Passionately

Hi Lexi,
you've set a nice scene here, but I think there's a fair amount you can do to make this more effective. Let's see what we can pick out.

One of the most important things in writing is realizing that every word in a piece is valuable; everything should be there for a reason. You can't afford to have extra bits that don't particularly add to the piece, particularly in poetry, because you have so little space to achieve so much. Take a look at this:

Your eyes,
bluer than the sky and deeper than the ocean,

Does it create an image? Yes. However, it doesn't make your poem richer. The comparisons are ones that everyone has seen before, so you're missing an opportunity to personalize the poem. When you look into a boy's blue eyes, do you ever think, "Oh man, those are bluer than the sky and deeper than the ocean." Probably not (although I suppose it's possible). However you might see his eyes and be reminded of your father's or the husky that you had as a kid or the ice that forms on your car in the morning. I remember a girl in high school who had light blue eyes and I always felt like I was staring into a frozen lake when I looked at her. It was beautiful in the way that jumping into icewater knocks the wind out of your lungs and cracks your ribs. When you're in it you want to get away as soon as possible, but when you're out you want to dive back in.
Make it real. Your description shouldn't just be pretty, it should be meaningful.

pierce me as though you can see into my soul.

One of the things I've learned as I've gathered more experience writing is that being timid almost always hurts you. State things powerfully and don't worry so much about being perfectly realistic. The tiny change of making this, "pierce into my soul" makes it significantly more powerful. The "as though" makes it sound weak and wishy-washy. This is your art, the truth is whatever you want it to be. It doesn't matter that he probably can't physically see your soul.

On a formatting note, try playing with stanzas. It's extremely hard to pull off a solid block of text effectively. Having no breaks makes everything run together. Use formatting to your advantage to accent important ideas and separate new ones.

shining through the agape curtains,
and the smell of fresh coffee and your cologne.

Read this out loud. Do you feel how "agape" creates a massive disruption in the flow of these lines? As you're writing, read to yourself in your head, or out loud, whichever works better. You can have a wonderfully insightful and deep poem, but if it has terrible flow it will be a bear to read. Getting a knack for flow comes with practice, (I know I still have a long way to go) but looking back over what you've written and getting it across your tongue should help a lot in finding problem areas.

My final comment, and my most important one, is to work on building depth. There's not a whole lot I can tell you on how exactly to do that, as everyone goes about it differently, but give your work meaning. Give me ideas to explore so that I'll want to read your poetry over and over. A scene is wonderful, but it should have a reason to be there. This poem has a reason to be here, but you need to bring that out so that it's not all out on the surface. A lot of the fun in reading poetry is digging for insight.

I know I threw a lot at you, but overall I did enjoy this and I'm interested in seeing where you go as a writer. It's also nice to see someone taking on sexuality in poetry. It's a topic that is largely treated with either fear or lack of respect. I'm glad to see this kind of poetry written way that is neither sleazy nor preachy.

Good luck and thanks for the read

This poem was quite interesting. The image your poem gives off is very romantic and I love your word choices. It's beautifully written. However, you made a few minor grammatical mistakes, just fix these and it'll be perfect.

-Cress

peirce me as though you can see into my soul.

*pierce

Your skin,
as soft as cloud,
lay touching mine.

*lies
You wouldn't say "Your skin lay touching mine" would you?

And your finger,
are intertwined with my chestnut curls.

Choose "fingers" or "is"

Your lips,
have never look more alluring.

*looked
It's "have looked"

[color=#FF0000]Are clothing lies on the floor. [/color]
*Our
"Are" and "Our" may sound alike, but "are" is a verb and "our" is a possessive pronoun.