Rosy Painted Butterflies

thankyou for all your comments:D There very helpful:)
just like to explain my choice of words:
Because upon that page, you wrote your name,
More beautiful than words,
I mean this as in the painting conveys their name. Not that there name is actually written. So their name is the painting.. a more beautiful way of writing it:)
but anyway.. THANKYOU:p

Hi.. Like the first reviewer I'll also say that there is a lot of repetition.. Replace the words and you could make this good poem a very brilliant one..
The flow was smooth and gentle.. I understood what you meant about 'I can't help reading it to tune everytime'.even i read it to a kind of tune.. I think you did something right by waiting for that old laptop to boot and suffering the boredom all that time and then putting it n YWS because this poem is worth it.. I loved it!! Very well writen..
Harshita:)

Wow, I really loved this poem ^_^ it was delicate, sad, yet... I didn't really know what it was about, which was great.

A bit of critique-yness:

laylaflame wrote:The canvas, so delicate, slipped into the flames,
the memories, and faces, slowly burnt away,
AndI’ll never see those rosy painted butterflies again,
No; I’ll never see your butterflies again…

I did the first one, but I won't do it for every line, it's NOT a capital letter, because you haven't put a full stop/question mark/exclamaion mark.

But I’ll not forget, the eyes that chose the rosy paint,
Or the careful hand, that brushed thevery strokes.
Because upon that page, you wrote your name,
More beautiful than words,
I won't forget, I can never forget, your name…

Okay a name IS words, words cannot be more beautiful than words, it just doesn't work.

The canvas, so delicate, slipped into the flames,
Your memories, your face, slowly burnt away,
now I’ll never see you paint again,
No; I’ll never see you again…

Yeah you posted something!! When I read this I was like woah! I wish I could write this good hahha I shall read your other one now!

Hi! I really enjoyed this piece. To me, it seemed more a poem than a song. Really well done! Your style is simplistic yet at the same time beautiful. Here's a nitpick!

laylaflame wrote:
The canvas, so delicate, slipped into the flames,
And the memories, and faces, slowly burnt away,
And I’ll never see those rosy painted butterflies again,
No I’ll never see your butterflies again

This stanza is nice, but you use the word and far to many times. You don't need ( in my opnion) to put 'And' here ( see above in pink)

But I’ll not forget, the eyes that picked the rosy paint,
Neither the careful hand, that made the very strokes,
Because upon that page, you wrote your name,
More beautiful than words,
So I cannot forget, I won’t forget, your name…

You don't need a comma here (see top line in the pink) You also used the word 'name' twice and it doesn't flow so well. On the last line, you don't need to put 'name'. Also, on the last line, if you changed the order it would make it more dramatic. Ie- 'So I won't forget: no, I cannot forget...'

And the canvas, so delicate, slipped into the flames,
And your memories, your face, slowly burnt away,
And I’ll never see you paint again,
No I’ll never see you again…