Published January 9, 2011
A storm of confusion rages inside my head,
I toss and turn whilst lay inside my bed.
I long for some form of salvation,
A life boat in this vast ocean,
A bright star in this sky of swirling clouds.
I’ve become everything I didn’t want to be
The guilt and doubt crashes down on me
Judgemental, calculating, suffocating.
I hold my saviour in my hand, steel and cold.
I press it to my skin, the familiar relief takes hold.
Deep, warm, running fault lines on my skin,
Crimson signals, warnings to the world.
‘S.O.S’, save her soul,
Before it obliterates into nothing.
You see, a selfish act begets a selfish act.
The things you’ve all done, there’s no validation for that.
I’ll hurt you as easily as you’ll hurt me,
It just so happens, my pain sets me free.
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141,708 Literary Works • 675,597 Reviews
I really liked this piece of poetry.
It was really emotional and quite a strong piece. Though I didnt think it flowed as best as it could.
It seemed a little cramped and rushed. Apart from that the wording is really good.
I enjoyd the imagery used.
Overall, Well done!
Hmm, this is the first poem I've seen with only one thing I'd like to point out, this poem was quite amazing and has shown me what you're feeling, and how you feel, and this is why I can't change your poem, or find anything really wrong with it. Besides the "S.O.S save her soul" Wouldn't you have wanted to put "S.H.S" That's just me, I know everyone knows what SOS is but seeing has you put "save her soul" They would understand. Anyhow that's all I have to say, this is a masterpiece of emotions, you can't go wrong with poetry when you are in a mood such as this.... I'd like to ask you if you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm a great listener.
~The Masked Poet
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