Published October 22, 2008
Consumed in my thoughts.
Just scattered and thrown
not quite sure of myself
and my strengths.
I'm not sure how much I can endure.
But I know I am strong.
Consumed.
I can feel that I'm not the person I once was.
But I shall persist and be determined to be myself.
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Canary word: Present
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138,455 Literary Works • 672,122 Reviews
Consumed is a wonderful poem I like how it doesnt scream me, me, me rather you say it without saying it. Now I'm sure theres a word for that lol I have short term memory lol lets go with that
I have to say overall these are my two favorite lines
"I can feel that I'm not the person I once was.
But I shall persist and be determined to be myself."
Great job keep it up!
Dude, I'm like so mesmorised its like mind bottling an yeah like what does this mean
Mod: Please don't swear in reviews.
This seems good for the beginning of something. Try adding more detail to make it longer: what brought you to that point, your own thoughts at the time ect. ect.
Nice poem. There are some grammar mistakes. I won't point them out thoguh, since DrammaMamma has already done so. It's true, and I hope that you continue to write, If you have any questions PM me. The best of luck!
Hi there. A short and simple poem:) Short poems like this makes it easy for readers to read it.
However, I feel there are some mistakes.
**I like how the word was fit into the poem here.
Besides that, I feel that the ending is .. Too sudden..? As in, maybe a better ending would have made the poem end smoothly. Yeah..
*Hmm, maybe you could have put in commas? To make the sentence a complete one? Yup.
Just some suggestions for you.
Overall, good attempt on this one!
Cheers,
DrammaMomma