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Young Writers Society

love.the lover and the beloved

by jossymaiye

He is as the cluster of camphire,
as the rows of jewels,
as a chain of gold,
He is her beloved.

She is as the fountain of gardens,
as a well of living water,
as an orchard of pomegranates,
She is his love.

He is as fine as gold,
as sweet as flowers,
as excellent as cedars,
He is her beloved.

She is as a flourished vine,
as fair as the moon,
as clear as the sun,
She is his love.

It is as strong as death,
as perfect as itself,
as a seal to their hearts,
It istheir love.

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798 Reviews

Points: 17580
Reviews: 798

Sun May 29, 2005 11:12 pm
Areida says...

It's pretty good...the title immediately makes me think of Song of Solomon. Not sure if that's what you were going for, but it's good.

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Points: 1212
Reviews: 241

Sun May 29, 2005 2:05 pm
Harley says...

I agree, it's a good poem, but it isn't as good as a song.

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323 Reviews

Points: 890
Reviews: 323

Wed Apr 20, 2005 7:55 pm
hekategirl says...

This seems more of a poem not a song. For one this you don't have a chorus. And the verses don't really flow like a song. I like it as a poem though.

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