Can't Help It But Cry

Sometimes I can’t help it but cry.
I don’t cry because it’s sad.
I cry because I think about the past,
And the future.

Are they watching?
Will they watch?
Why did it happen?
What will happen?

I think about him,
So protective,
So playful,
So careful;
The past.
Why?

I also think about him,
So funny,
So playful,
So loving;
The past.
Why?

I think about them.
What will happen?
I am worried,
Scarred,
Afraid,
Will I be alone?

I watch a movie,
I read a book,
I listen to a song.
Sometime I can’t help it but cry.
I don’t cry because it’s sad.
I cry because I thing about the past,
And about the future.

I loved them,
I love them.
I will always love them all.
What will happen?

Comments & reviews · 2
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User avatar
XxMattxX
Review

Hello!
I'm Jojo and I shall be your reviewer for today!
Here we go!


Sometimes I can’t help it but cry.
I don’t cry because it’s sad.-#0000FF "> that right there is a really weak sentence. "It's" just throws me off. You need to specify if you want to keep it in the poem.Not really need, anyway.
I cry because I think about the past,
And the future.

Are they watching?
Will they watch?
Why did it happen?- #0000FF ">I would switch this line with the one behind it if i were you, it makes a lot more sense that way.
What will happen?

I think about him,
So protective,
Soplayful,-#0000FF ">three "so's" aren't vital to the beauty of this poem.
So careful;
The past.
Why?- #0000FF ">why are you asking"why?" let the reader in on the actual question.


I alsothink about him,-#0000FF "> "also" isn't needed.
So funny,
So playful,
So loving;
The past.
Why?- again#0000FF ">- why "why?"

I think about them.
What will happen?
I am worried,
Scarred,#0000FF ">( or scared?- because using scarred doesn't seem to fit the overall mood of the poem.)
afraid,
Will I be alone?

I watch a movie#FF0000 ">.(period)
I read a book#FF0000 ">.(period)
I listen to a song.
Sometime I can’t help it but cry.
I don’t cry because it’s sad.
I cry because I thing about the past,
And about the future.

#0000FF ">All that isn't need, either. You could just jump into the rest of the poem, and it would finish beautifully.

I loved them,
I love them#0000FF ">(all).
I will always love them all.
What will happen?


Now, with all of the edits....
Sometimes I can’t help it but cry.
I cry because I think about the past,
And the future.

Are they watching?
Will they watch?
What will happen?
Why did it happen?

I think about him,
So protective,playful,
So careful;
The past.

I think about him,
So funny, playful,
So loving;
The past.

I think about them.
What will happen?
I am worried,
scared?-
Afraid,
Will I be alone?

I watch a movie.
I read a book.
I listen to a song.
Sometime I can’t help it but cry.

I loved them,
I love them all.
I will always love them all.
What will happen?


Overall:
I loved this poem, it just had a whole bunch of filler and unnecessary repetition.
All you need to do is make sure that you say only what you need to in order to get the point across.
Engage the reader, give detail.
But it's lovely.
Spelling is flawless.

Nice job!
Keep Writing!
--------------------------
-Jojo

Random avatar
danipower0204
Review

Sometimes I can’t help it but cry.
I don’t cry because #FF0000 ">I'm sad.
I cry because I think about the past,
And the future.

Are they watching?
Will they watch?
Why did it happen?
What will happen?

I think about him,
So protective,
So playful,
So careful;
The past.
Why? #FF0000 ">I like the structure of this part here.

I think about him#FF0000 ">I would get rid of "also",
So funny,
So playful,
So loving;
The past.
Why?

I think about them.
What will happen?
I am worried,
Scarred,
Afraid,
Will I be alone?

I watch a movie,
I read a book,
I listen to a song.
Sometime I can’t help it but cry.
I don’t cry because it’s sad.
I cry because I thing about the past,
And about the future.

I loved them,
I love them.
I will always love them all.
What will happen?


All in all, I enjoyed it. It's kind of mysterious, as you don't really tell us what happened, you just ask quesitons, which can make it personal for anyone really. Good job!



All we can do is our best, and hope that it was enough.
— CandyWizard