She stood there in the pouring rain, her face turned up to the sky. Her eyeliner, once perfectly placed, smeared down her cheeks, a mixture of tears and rain. Her whole body shook with the pain she felt. The realization hit her hard: She had nothing left to lose. Her world had shattered. Her love was gone. Even her best friend of fourteen years, couldn't be bothered with her feeble, desperate cries for mercy.
She stood there in the pouring rain, her hands held up in the air high above her head, a symbol of surrender, salvation, in a mixture of fear and relief. Her whole heart shook with the breaking it felt. The truth hit it hard: She had chosen the wrong path. Made the right mistake. The mistake that would take everything away. Even her God couldn't be bothered with its stuttering, guilt-ridden beats, made in vain.
She stood there in the pouring rain, her eyes closed to the universe around her. Once seeming so big, now literally nothing but dust. A scattering memory, flying with the wind that whispers, "Will there be a tomorrow?"
Her whole conscious shook with the understanding she felt. The knowledge hit her hard: This was the only way. She had nothing left to live for, and nothing left to give. And there was so much she never should have taken in the first place. Like all that they gave. She'd taken it. Taken it for granted. She hadn't cared. They were supposed to love her. That's what they were living for.
He sped down the road in the pouring rain, his hands white on the wheel. His mind, once made up on leaving her, was now distorted with his love. A mixture of terror and shock washed over him as her figure loomed ahead. In the middle of the road stood the image of a goddess, an angel among men.
And he swerved...
...But not fast enough.
The screeches of tires filled her ears, but only a second too late. Her body now lay beneath the scorching hot metal that had once driven her to countless happy dates. But now, it would have created a new memory. That is, only if she had made it through that stormy night alive..
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125,005 Literary Works • 672,804 Reviews
Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm Knight Hardy here on a mission to ensure that all works on YWS has at least two reviews. You will probably never see this but....Imma do this anyway.
First Impression: Well, this was a rather heavy chapter right here, it seems to be one tragedy in progress and then in attempting to resolve said tragedy another much worse tragedy occurs, and I think you manage to convey it quite powerfully here.
Anyway let's get right to it,
Well it appears this story is getting off to a start with a very low note here, definitely catches your attention right off the bat with what looks like someone that has lost quite a lot in life recently and for some reason even a supposed best friend of 14 years is ignoring, that certainly makes you wonder if that friend is actually a friend or not...but, well, intriguing start here.
Well, alright now it looks like she's in the middle of a bit of a big realization here, and it appears that she believes she undertook a path that was some kind of big mistake for some reason...aand she now appears to be saddened by that and trying to perhaps find forgiveness....well this is getting interesting here.
Well, that's not a good sign...she appears to be in a very low state in life there, almost having lost the will to live by the sounds of that. The memory description there is also quite powerfully done here.
Well, this is going down a very dangerous path, and I can see some subtle hints there that whatever relationship is causing her all of this grief wasn't a very good one at all, there certainly appears to be some hidden secrets right there.
Ohhh....well this looks to be perhaps the cause of her current state of mind, and he appears to almost want to fix things here by the sound of it, the state you describe in here as he drives certainly suggest that he has a single-minded goal somewhat like that here.
Welll...that ended on a note I wasn't expecting, the plot basically swerved up on all us readers much like this car did...and well, a powerful ending...here, you clearly get to see here that the woman here dies by that car...and it all seems like a very final piece here, I almost get the feeling this was not meant to be a longer story here.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
Overall: Overall, this was a very well written piece here. You can really feel the anguish of this woman and then the hurry and desperation in the man, and well, the inevitable is described rather powerfully there in that final paragraph.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry