z

Young Writers Society



Demon ~Excerpt~

by iEuphoria


But the realization had kicked in, and it kicked her hard. She was a monster. She had achieved nothing in her life, except knocking down and slaughtering any bit of happiness that those that mattered to her was once filled with. She was a “vile creature” as he said. Just another troublesome enemy of mankind. Her smile, once unable to leave her face was now far gone, completely lost of how to come back to her pale face. Without him, there was nothing left of her. She simply had no other reason of living, baring a heart, which apparently hers was frozen solid in another dimension. She had nothing left.. Not even George Carlin, or Mayday Parade could make her feel anything anymore.. She was numb. Sickened by the own thought of her own existence.


Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments



User avatar
4096 Reviews


Points: 253363
Reviews: 4096

Donate
Thu Sep 09, 2021 11:21 am
KateHardy wrote a review...



Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm Knight Hardy here on a mission to ensure that all works on YWS has at least two reviews. You will probably never see this but....Imma do this anyway.

Anyway let's get right to it,

But the realization had kicked in, and it kicked her hard. She was a monster. She had achieved nothing in her life, except knocking down and slaughtering any bit of happiness that those that mattered to her was once filled with. She was a “vile creature” as he said. Just another troublesome enemy of mankind. Her smile, once unable to leave her face was now far gone, completely lost of how to come back to her pale face. Without him, there was nothing left of her. She simply had no other reason of living, baring a heart, which apparently hers was frozen solid in another dimension. She had nothing left.. Not even George Carlin, or Mayday Parade could make her feel anything anymore.. She was numb. Sickened by the own thought of her own existence.


Well the last excerpt I ran into from this novel was a very different one, and assuming this isn't just a different novel of the same name....this looks like a very different point in the story and potentially some kind of other turning point, except while that other one was more revengy sounding, this feels like a character that's almost give up somehow here and has sort of lost the will to live.

We also get to see that this is perhaps the result of some sort of breakup in a relationship..which is certainly interesting. I get the feeling when the title of this says demons, its probably not referring to any actual demons by the looks of things here. This relationship of sorts also seems to be fairly toxic here, what with mentions of how it is this person that has called here all sorts of names and it seems as if this person has convinced her to be in this state that she's currently in.

All in all this comes together to make this yet another intriguing excerpt from this particular story here...and it definitely seems to be sort of thing that I'd read here.

Aaaaand that's it for this one.

As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.

Stay Safe
Harry




User avatar
49 Reviews


Points: 3034
Reviews: 49

Donate
Sun Dec 30, 2012 5:22 am
iEuphoria wrote a review...



Hey Euph, Alex again! ~Sorry, my account wasn't working..~
So, I'm just going to start by saying how this hardly counts as a short story, even if it's just an excerpt.. I think you should add to things more before posting things.. That said, I hope this is not a personal reflection when I say this ;; It appears to be an obvious teenage angst, and little girls who want to kill themselves over stupid boy. As mean as this might be Yuffie, I suggest not pursuing this type of writing..
If you have any questions on why I feel this way, feel free to Skype me or message me on here (Not sure if I'll manage to get my account back in time..) But, good luck and keep writing, kiddo!






... that was weird



iEuphoria says...


My friend Alex apparently got into my account.. xD




Edna began to feel like one who awakens gradually out of a dream, a delicious, grotesque, impossible dream, to feel again the realities pressing into her soul.
— Kate Chopin, The Awakening