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Mrs Jones - chapter 13

by heffa89

Hi! Wow. it's been 10 years since i've been on here. But I got a request to publish more of mrs jones. And it is done , so here goes. Let me know if you want more . :)

PS: It's over a decade since I wrote it, please review, but I didn't before posting so there may be mistakes =)

Liz <3




Amanda woke up alone.

She yawned and smiled for herself before she suddenly jolted and felt her insides freeze up as the memory of last night came back to her. She put the pillow over her head as she wished for a black hole to appear so she could get lost there. She felt nauseous and dizzy and suddenly got very hot.

She had singlehanded managed to ruin her friendship with David. It had just been luck that had kept them together after the party last week, and now she had given in again. How weak was she really? Just crushing under his gaze? Like he was her kryptonite? Their relationship couldn’t survive another “mistake” she knew that and it seemed like David had figured it out as well.

Of course David had left. As soon as he sobered up he had probably remembered and regretted everything that happened. And he had taken off! Fled even. He probably hated her for not stopping him. He was most likely to never want to see her again, afraid that Evelyn would get to know. And if she did, he’d be sure to blame Amanda for that too, wouldn’t he?

She had lost him. For sure…

Amanda threw the pillow on the floor in anger and just as she was about to kick off her duvet and get up, she saw the door being pushed open. Apparently David had left it ajar when he left. The first thing she saw was a tray with two cups and something that looked and smelled like toast…

“Morning!” said a smiling face.

Amanda’s face turned bright red as she beamed. She really couldn’t believe it. She had to be dreaming, right?


David laughed a little. “Who else were you expecting?” He closed the door silently with his foot and walked over and sat down on the bed, giving Amanda a passionate kiss.

“Here we’ve got breakfast for my girlie. Toast, eggs, tea…,” he scanned the tray, “Oh, um, yeah that’s it. Good enough?” His eyes twinkled as he smiled at her.

Amanda was lost for words. She kept blinking looking at him and down to the tray, and back to him again. “Am I dreaming?” she asked, not being able to stop grinning.

David took a bite of the buttered toast. “Um, no? Why?”

Amanda looked down in silence and took one of the teacups as she sat up, making herself more comfortable. “I just thought you’d…” she sipped her cup before continuing. “I thought you would run off when you woke up and remembered what had happened…”

David froze for a second and suddenly became serious. He looked up at her with not a hint of his usual smirk.

“Look,” he took her free hand, “I dunno why what happened last night happened. And I dunno why we did the same last week. I thought about going home. But to what? An empty apartment?”

Amanda chocked a little on her tea and coughed. Was she just a substitute? Was she some kind of hobby David had when Evelyn was away? Didn’t he get anything? She felt herself getting pale again.

David continued, clearly noticing. “I mean, back there everything reminds me of her…” he sighed. “And it doesn’t feel like home, it never has. But with you…” he took a deep breath, like preparing himself for a dive, “with you everything feels like home.”

He looked up at her. Amanda didn’t know what to say. She didn’t know what that meant. Was home good? Was home something he wanted but couldn’t really have?

He looked like he was waiting for her to say something. “I, um…” she started. “David what does that mean? I can’t take another situation like we had last time.” She held her hands in front of her eyes while she looked down.

“Hey,” David said softly, taking her hand again, freeing her face. “I’m sorry about last time. I screwed up! Yeh, I did, Mandy!” he added when he saw she was gonna start making herself co-guilty. “Mandy, do you know why I blamed you? Do you know what I was thinking when you took off and you wouldn’t want to talk to me?”

Amanda just shook her head looking at him with tears in her eyes, clutching to the cup in one hand, David holding on to her other.

“I was confused.” He said shortly before he took a break and then continued. “I thought about whatever made me kiss you in the tree hut. I could blame it on the alcohol, sure. But I mean only lame people do that, and I don’t want to be lame. There’s always been something between us hasn’t there?” He didn’t wait for her to answer. “It just took me too long to see it. This feels right. This feels like home. I can’t believe it took me over 23 years to figure it out. I want you, Mandy!”

Amanda smiled. She was sure she was dreaming. This was the words she had been longing to hear all her life. She retracted her hand from his and pinched herself. She winced in pain.

David raised his eyebrows at her. “What are you doing?”

Amanda’s eyes flushed. “Just checking…”

“For what?” He smiled at her again.

“That I wasn’t dreaming.”

David chuckled as he ate more toast.

“Don’t you laugh at me!” she smiled as she hit him playfully before starting to help herself to some toast as well.

They sat like that; eating and looking at each other in silence. Amanda couldn’t stop smiling. She was happy, so abnormally happy. He was hers. He wanted her. She felt like she was weightless.

She suddenly jolted and her face became serious again.

“What?” David asked her.

“Did anybody see you down there?”

David shook his head, still smiling at her. “Nope, it’s only 8.30, Mandy.” He nodded towards the clock on her bedside table.

She turned and saw that he was right. The only person that would consider getting up at that time was…

“Don’t worry about Katie, she wasn’t up. I actually checked.” He grinned at her and raised his eyebrows. “You know, I think Lucas stayed over as well.” David winked at her and Amanda giggled. “And the Twins were wasted!”

“Even Marcus?” Amanda asked him with some doubt in her voice.

“Even Marcus!” David chuckled as he suddenly remembered something. “Ah, you should see him trying to pick up this girl.”

Amanda looked shocked. “Marcus did?”

“Yes, he was so wasted though. He used the nerdiest pick up line ever.”

“Oh no,” Amanda couldn’t stop grinning picturing Marcus stumbling over to some girl trying to pick her up. “What did he say?”

David straightened himself up and lowered his voice a little. “Baby, if you were words in a book, you’d be what they call FINE PRINT.” David chuckled so much that he was shaking.

Amanda giggled as well. “So, did it work then?”

David stopped shaking and looked less humoured. “That’s the worst thing. I think it did.”

Now Amanda laughed hard. “The worst thing, David? Aren’t you happy for him?”

“Yeah, but it shouldn’t have worked. It’s so cheesy!”

“Awh, honey, if I was drunk and feeling a bit lonely that would’ve worked on me.”

David looked intrigued. “It would? Really?”

Amanda drank from her cup, not breaking eye contact with him. “Mhum,” she said when.

“So speaking of cheesy pick-up lines,” he said putting the, now, empty tray on the floor, wearing a cocky grin on his face, “So, babe, you look very sweet…”

Amanda looked at him with a smiling question-mark look on her face, she felt herself blush a little as she waited for the rest.

“Can I have a sample?”

Amanda burst out laughing. David just smiled proudly at her. He was so gorgeous she couldn’t believe how someone could be that perfect just wearing a white t-shirt and boxers and having their hair messed like that. Talk about bed-head!

She put her tea cup on beside her clock and leaned over to him, she stopped an inch from his face. “Sure, you can, babe.” She put her hands around his neck and kissed him passionately. At first he didn’t respond, looking a bit stunned and surprised, but after a second he kissed her back, pushing her body backwards so he was halfway lying on top of her.

When they broke apart, both panting for air, he lay down on his side beside her, with an arm on her waist. “I can’t believe it, so they really do work then?”

Amanda smiled at him, and lifted up the duvet. “Mhum, now you come here so we can make like a fabric softener and cuddle.”

They both laughed as he hurried under the duvet and held her firmly against his body as he kissed her again.


Amanda was still in her pyjamas, sitting with her knees under her head and gazing happily at nothing, when Katie and Lucas came – all showered, dressed and perfect looking, of course – walking in to the living room holding hands and bumping each other with their shoulders, both glowing.

“Amanda, are you up already?” Katie smiled and looked at her.

Amanda continued to gaze beamingly into space, not noticing them, as Lucas walked in to the kitchen to make tea. Katie sat down aside her waving a hand in front of her face.

“Amanda?” Katie asked again.

This time Amanda reacted. She jolted and looked at Katie, still smiling.

Katie smiled back and gave a little wave. “Hello.”

“Hello, Katie – best friend!” Amanda said hugging her tightly, radiating.

Katie looked surprised but hugged her back. “What was that for?”

Amanda was still beaming. “Oh, no reason. I just love you so much!”

Katie smiled back and stared investigatory at her. “Amanda, are you drunk?”

Amanda laughed and ruffled Katie’s hair. “Ah, you funny little thing!” Amanda stood up all of a sudden. “I’m gonna go make some tea!” She headed for the kitchen, but Katie grabbed her bizarrely oversized jumper before she had gotten far from the couch. “Lucas is making us some tea already.”

“Ah, brilliant!” Amanda beamed and fell back in the couch. She let out a big, long, happy sigh.

“Amanda, what’s up with you?” Katie couldn’t stop giggling at her.

Amanda giggled a bit herself when she thought about the reason. “Nothing, I am just ridiculously happy!”

Katie looked at her investigatory, still smiling at her. “What’s happened? Last night you were bummed about the entire David fiasco and now you are glowing more than even I am, and I am pregnant!”

Amanda opened her mouth to tell her about David’s decision, but stopped in mid-air, they had decided to not tell anyone just yet. But Katie didn’t count did she? Amanda decided against telling Katie the truth. She beamed at her. “I’m gonna be an aunty aren’t I?”

Katie smiled back at her and rubbed her stomach which wasn’t that big yet.

“So,” Amanda said, nodding towards Katie’s tummy, “when will you start showing?”

Katie was still stroking her belly as Lucas came in juggling a teapot and three cups. “Soon.” He said grinning. He had clearly heard their conversation.

He kissed Katie gently on the mouth before he poured them all tea.

“Yeah, Daddy’s right,” Katie said, “I’m 13 weeks so I should start showing already, but the doctor said that sometimes it took a bit longer for first-timers. I hope it starts showing more soon though. I wanna go maternity shopping!”

“Oh!” Amanda said, just as excited as Katie, “Can’t I join you??”

“Of course you can!” Katie almost screamed.

Lucas sat down and put an arm around his baby’s mother and held his cup with the other one. “Now, girls, calm yourselves.” He said mockingly.

Katie slapped him playfully on his thigh. “Like you aren’t excited!” she looked over at Amanda. “You know, he woke me up last night when he got home just to tell me that I was pregnant!”

Amanda cried out in laughter. “Luc,” she looked at a red-faced Lucas, “you do know she’s the one carrying your baby. She was the first to know…”

Lucas looked embarrassed as he tried to avoid Amanda’s and Katie’s gaze by staring down at the tea. Katie nudged him with her elbow.

Lucas grinned sheepishly. “If I’ve ever learned anything in my life; it’s to not party with the Twins. They’re insane!”

Both of the girls nodded and laughed.

“So, you had fun then Luc?” Amanda winked at him.

“Sure,” he cleared his throat, “from what I can remember we enjoyed ourselves…”

Amanda burst out in another fit of laughter as Katie giggled while looking lovingly up into his eyes and stroking his cheek. Going out getting drunk was so not Lucas. In Amanda’s eyes he was the responsible one. The Twins; well you couldn’t expect much from them now could you? And David; well, he enjoyed a good party from time to time too. Not Lucas though, a couple of beers at the most, then he would usually hit the water.

“What are you guys being loud for?” Matt came in rubbing his eyes, his blonde hair standing everywhere, he looked like he could have slept for another week.

“We’re mocking Lucas’ drinking abilities,” Katie answered beaming at her boyfriend. Lucas’ cheeks flushed red as Katie stroked them.

Matt laughed once as he dumped down beside Amanda. She put her arm around his broad shoulders and stroked him gently. “Poor baby. Too much?”

He nodded but smiled. “Was good fun though! I’ve never seen a man drink that much before.” He looked at Lucas in awe.

“Never. Again.” Lucas said smirking.

Matt rested his head on Amanda’s shoulders. “I’m afraid you might be right. When your kid comes along you’ll be forgetting us fun ones and be all grown-up and boring.”

“I can’t wait,” Lucas said, more to Katie than to Amanda and Matt, as he looked her deeply in the eyes and held Katie’s hands over her stomach.

“You two make me sick!” Matt said, making a gagging sound, but winking at them to show he was only joking.

Amanda’s eyes were stuck on Katie’s belly. Maybe she and David might be at their position some day soon? A baby with Dave… That would be happiness!

Spice Girls suddenly buzzed out of Amanda’s phone which lay on the table and everyone except Amanda groaned.

“Honey,” Katie looked at her like she was mentally unstable, “when are you ever going to change that?”

“What?” Amanda shrugged as she reached for her cell. When she saw who it was she blushed a little, got up quickly and skipped out of the room as she said hello leaving the other three behind with question marks on their faces.

“Has Amanda got a new boyfriend we don’t know about?” Matt asked rubbing his head, looking at Katie.

Katie looked as confused and curious as the other two. “I dunno. She hasn’t told me anything. I thought she was too hung up on David… Maybe I was wrong?”

Matt stopped in mid-air and gazed with an open mouth at Katie, Lucas did the same thing.

“Rewind a little, please?” Matt said, “Amanda and David? I thought they just slept together by mistake?”

“Yeh,” Lucas agreed, “what is it you’re not telling us?”

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User avatar
200 Reviews

Points: 14056
Reviews: 200

Sun Jun 28, 2020 9:04 am
LittleLee wrote a review...

Hey there, heffa89, I'm Lee and here to review your work.
I haven't read any of the previous chapters, so I don't know anything about the characters or plot. Because of this, I will only review the grammar, sentence construction, etc.
Let's begin.

She yawned and smiled for herself

"For herself" doesn't mean anything really, I suggest you remove it.

the memory of last night

I think "last night" is used in the present tense or in dialogue. here, the sentence should be rewritten as, "the memory of the previous night".

She had singlehanded managed


How weak was she really? Just crushing under his gaze? Like he was her kryptonite?

This really good be rewritten in a better way. the second question is thoroughly confusing, and I think it should be added to the first rather than being its own.

Their relationship couldn’t survive another “mistake” she knew that and it seemed like David had figured it out as well.

After "mistake", there needs to be a comma. And "she knew that" ought to end with a fullstop, making the second half of the sentence and independent one.

And he had taken off! Fled even.

...that's the exact same thing. No need to repeat yourself..

She felt herself getting pale again.

Going would be a good substitute for "getting".

Was home good? Was home something he wanted but couldn’t really have?

Okay, I don't think this is a good line. Of course home is good. Perhaps you could say, "Did he really feel at home?" or something to make sense out of her feelings?

clutching to the cup in one hand

"To" shouldn't be in this sentence at all.

“I’m gonna go make some tea!” She headed for the kitchen

After an exclamation mark in quotes, the word that follows shouldn't begin with a capital letter.

Okay, that's all I have to say. Oh, and the dialogues are quite realistic and fun to read. Good job on that.
I hope you keep writing. If I was too critical, I'm sorry! Just trying to help you out.
Good luck!
- Lee

User avatar
174 Reviews

Points: 3050
Reviews: 174

Sun May 31, 2020 5:14 pm
JesseWrites wrote a review...


I am unsure about this story because I haven't read the previous parts. Please forgive that part of me.

What I Like

The character development is key in stories and this is no lie. Lucas is a pretty good character with feelings. That is all a work really needs to revolve around. Like stars and a planet, which is main and secondary people. Think of that.


I couldn't find any from a quest to, so yay.

This review is brought to you by,
Team Aubergine Leader, Haley

You can cut all the flowers, but you cannot stop Spring from coming.
— Pablo Neruda