Nostalgia

Hey happiestwr1t1ng23, nice poem I would say this deserves five stars not only for a job when done but for the good flow that it gives and the sadness that comes over a broken friendship. I like the last stanza it really made the whole thing come together "But I should've known the very second our fingertips touched that it wouldn't last forever, not like the kiss of death that forever plagued our friendship." I will quote this when I have it memorized. Keep up the good work!!

I.
Am.
Batman.

Hey, happiestwr1t1ng23. xJ here for a well-deserved review.

Let's take this sentence by sentence. Usually I would do this line by line, and take my sweet time, but I feel that takes too long and I end up boring writers with my reviews. Anyway,

First Sentence: "Leaves twirled gracefully, following the path of the autumn breeze that seemed to smack violently across my face as I realized that you were no longer beside me." Alright, a few issues with this first sentence. The first being that you are using present and past tense in this sentence in a bit of a mess. Such as "twirled" then "following" and "seemed" and so on... Also, I would think It'd be better if you used a different word rather than "smack." It would make the first line sound much better. ^.^

Second Sentence: "I lost all sense of direction now that you're gone." Again with the past/present tense. You used past tense for the first part with "lost" and then present with "you're gone." Please decide which one you are going to use BEFORE starting on a poem. Also, make sure to proof read before you submit.

Third Sentence: "The sweet scent of pinecones that we both once admired as we giggled at the simplest things in life, now reeked of the harsh reminder of your absence, the mud that I used to not mind splashing in with my yellow rain boots stained my grey tennis shoes to my disdain because it all too well took me back to when life was happier...to when you were with me." This entire sentence takes up a paragraph on its own. You need a period instead of a comma after "your absence." You need a pause every now and then, otherwise the flow of the poem is thrown out of balance. Also, nice use of the word "disdain" since it's not the most common of words.

Fourth Sentence: "I stopped at the oak tree we used to dare each other to climb and let time pass us by as we played." Again with the past/present tense. Proof read before you submit. Thanks.

Fifth Sentence: "I traced my finger across the bark where you'd gotten the splinter you begged me to pry out." Great sentence. No issues or nitpicks here. Plus, this part gives me a cute mental picture. Kudos for that.

Sixth Sentence: "Blood trickled from right where it'd impaled, giving you the idea of becoming "blood brothers"" You forgot to add a period here, but good use of the word "impaled" which is another uncommon word.

Final Sentence: "But I should've known the very second our fingertips touched that it wouldn't last forever, not like the kiss of death that forever plagued our friendship." You nailed this ending! Overall, great poem, I could feel the emotion. But, at the beginning this gave me an idea that you were with a partner, until the "blood brothers" part.

May your travels through space and time be merry,

-xJ ❤︎

Hi! Just like the comment below, I first thought that you were describing a lover or a girl-friend, but then when I reached the bottom, it was "blood brothers", neither one of my assumptions was right. haha.

I loved how it started and hated how it ended. I can deeply feel the emotions that you have when you're writing this. I feel so sorry that you have to experience such pain.

Losing someone might be the end of the physical contact, but then again, you gained an angel up there that is looking at you from above.

Use your emotions to create more lovely literature like this. Keep it up!

Hi!

I really enjoyed this piece.

You did such a nice job in explaining the true feelings that one goes through during a terrible loss. The detail really captured my emotions.

I was a little confused at first if the person you were describing was a lover or a friend but as I kept reading I realized it was a friend.

This is a very nice Poem...I look forward to reading more.

~Elephant

This is a poem of deep emotion. I can tell that you feel strongly about your friend, it is cool that you can write a poem so deep in thought. The poem was well detailed, I can tell that you put thought into it. You did well and I think that you should keep writing.
You did great!
Awesome job!

This is utterly beautiful