Hey I may not know how to sing
How to dance
How to keep up with the rhythm
My lyrics may stink
But this is what I got to say to you
I will keep trying
Now hear me sing
As I pour out my soul before you
Look at me catch the rhythm from my heart
My goofy dances move pushing me thru the dance floor
Want to laugh at me well go ahead
For this is my song
I can do what I want
Whether it bring you to tears
Or to joyous laughter
Come around and hear my song
As I sing from the heart
For I write this song on my bus
The way to school
As I think of other places
My heart yearning for some attention
Get on the dance floor
Move your hips as we dance
For this is my song to you
It time to have fun
As I sing from the bottom of my heart
Join me as I sing from my heart
Let your voice be heard
It time to have fun
It your time for the spotlight
For I sing this song
From my heart
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125,005 Literary Works • 672,804 Reviews
Hi there! I think this is a really lovely song and I admire how personal it is - and quite relatable as I can't dance myself xD. I really like the lyric "pour out my soul before you" - I thought that was quite a powerful lyric and obviously you're very eloquent. One thing I would say to improve though is the structure and how it's laid out. Personally, I always picture songs as being laid out in sections so that you can separate the chorus from other verses. Therefore, it would make it easier to see the structure of the song and how it develops. Also the way you've said "it time to have fun" rather than "it's" I'm not sure I am keen on. However, overall this song is really cool and you should keep writing - well done!
This is a very nice and heartfelt lyric that I very much enjoyed. Dividing into sections or stanzas (I don't know what term you would use for a lyric) would aid in readability, as well as some punctuation. Lyrics are difficult to judge without a sense of the rhythm behind them. I really liked the lines:
Keep writing stuff like this.
"For I write this song on my bus
The way to school"
These gave a sense of rhythm in the very wording of them. Probably my favorite bit of the whole piece.
However, there is one line that I completely disagree with.
"My lyrics may stink"
They don't.
it all the truth for i was writing this on the the bus the way to school lmao
This song should be written in song form also it needs punctuation so that people know how to sing it in their head to get a rythem.
also I think you bring up dancing and singing a bit to often but that's just my oppinion you may keep or change according to you.
It's also a little hard to understand what your trying to write about like the back story to the lyrics.
otherwise it is a great song and I can't wait to see more from you. I wish you all the luck in the world. keep writing don't ever give up also good luck and I really hope to see more.