The siren's Call

by fallenoutofgrace

Published October 25, 2014

12+ Violence

In Horror Stories

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A/N the ***** are different times, and places so you can get the whole story sorry if its confusing. Also cutting back on a lot of the gore that I originally to do.

There he stood staring back at me with a look of astonishment. Wait. No, it was not that it was a look of terror. My muscles locked up as I moved my body to face where his stone cold glazed faced. Therein the water was our demise, sirens. There with onyx eyes glistening with murderous content accompanied with two other beautiful demons. My constricting voice croaked out a frighten laugh as my mind flashed to what brought them to here in the first place.

“Come on it’ll be fun, beside you need the cash.” Jonas said.
“Yea, but really Athena’s treasure. It is a myth bro, a legend.” I try to explain.
“Well I’m going, whether you come or not it’s your choice.” Jonas retaliated.
“Fine, all go, only to keep you idiot ass safe.” I laughed pushing Jonas lovingly, who knows maybe this will be fun.

We arrived when Apollo chased away the moon in his fiery chariot. Our destination would be the deepest section of the cove; even the anglers do not venture that far. Legend has it; it is the home of the sirens. Yea right when pigs fly. The sun seethed on at us blistering our skin when we arrived. We set out the lines and the scuba gear all set when it happened.

I looked over to the beautiful women. My thoughts were the consistency of sewer water. I looked to Jonas as if go inside not sure how to address the situation. I looked over the boat at the three, they all wore similar tops the only distinguishing were the different shades to blues, light greens, to lastly a soft pink. The leader of the women it seemed stepped up and smiled. It was as if my knees were water and buckled at the sweet incense that was her voice. “We just stopped by for an afternoon swim. Would you like to hear a story?” she asked with a voice of silk it was as if I was a puppet my head nodded.

The leader of the group beamed, her eyes transfixed to the sky as if in deep memories.

" There once was three beautiful sisters born from their human mother and Achelous, the river god. There names were Rosen, Nala, and Helen. Nala and Helen were twins and walked the earth for 16 years. Rosen the youngest walked the earth for only 11 years. For the three sisters life was splendid, they were the pearls to their fathers eyes and could woo any men they liked, even women would stop an gaze at their beauty. But, then the goddess Aphrodite became jealous and cursed the three sisters into monsters. Their father who once looked down on them with pride and love decided to take his daughters to a sanctuary, the cove of Athena. For you see, Him and Athena were Together for nearly 300 years and still remained close friends today. But alas, Athena looked at the three and saw that there was no help. They were monsters and had to be dealt as such. she banished the sisters to the coves eastern from her place to live their lives.

But on good did come out of the curse, there power to lure and their beauty remained intact in their voice. Their song was mostly this," she said before beginning the song.

Once he hears to his heart's content, sails on, a wiser man.

We know all the pains that the Greeks and Trojans once endured
on the spreading plain of Troy when the gods willed it so—all that comes to pass on the fertile earth, we know it all!"

She looked up at the young man now and smiled, men so easy to fool she thought. She moved closer still looking up, " Now listen carefully, I wish you to gather up your crew to come swim with us." she directed.

I nodded rushing out almost stumbling over the gear set out, forgotten. My voice ricocheted, " It's safe come out, come out for a swim!"

The crew with some effort on my part reluctantly came out, to see what has cause so much mayhem. The moment they looked down it was over. Like lemming's they jumped to their deaths with a crisp splash.

I beamed at the women like See! See! I did what you ask! " What are your names anyway?" I ask curious.

The closest sister, the one that told the sister grinned, " My name is Helen, my sister in blue is Nala, and my sister in pink is Rosen. Were here to kill you come along little sailors" she chuckled before beginning to swim off to the cave jutting out from the soaring cliff.

My strokes became hysteric as I tried to catch them as fast as I could, hearing the vicious lapping of water I knew I wasn't the only one.

My arms blistered and screeched in outrage as we still propelled. My legs were two tons of cement sinking toward the cove's floor.  Soon we made it to the cave, My eyes scanned the cave's floor past the foot high of gnawed bones littering everywhere. Boy these ladies have some strange fetishes. I thought laughing.

They lead us to another section of the room where they told Jonas and I to wait while they took the captain to a different room.  I watched amazed as the rounded the corners, The screams exploded outward before tuning to soft gurgles, then silence. WHAT?!? He got to have fun with them first! UNCOOL. I WANT TO PLAY WITH BONES! me temper rose as I knew I was missing out.

Jonas looked his eyes less fogged over now after hearing the screams and looked to his brother, " we need to leave" he said.

I looked dumbfounded. was he stupid! " No were going to play with the sisters. Why would you leave?" he asked.

Jonas looked " Your not listening We need to leave im not leaving you bro" he said moisture escaped his tired eyes. " Your the only family I got bro"

I looked " Then stay cause im not going." he said.

Jonas growled softly before trying to pull his brother off his crazy butt and leave.

I yell " GET OFF!" and shove him hard into the pile of aged bones. " I'm staying. If you loved me you would to" I said.

Jonas looked brushing off the bones and relucently  sat back down. He knew they wouldn't leave, but he couldn't live with the guilt of knowing he didn't save his brother.

**********************************
Nala  beamed as she turned slightly a delicate finger coaxing the salty sea captain closer. As soon as they were out of sight of the other two,  the feast began. Helen was first to demonstrate to Rosen.  " Now it's different for all of us, you may want to take it slow and rip them apart, or quick and slit their throats. Its all up to you, But I will be showing you the slow while Nala shows you the quick, then its your turn to try Alright?" she asked

Rosen nodded beaming " Yes Helen" she said entranced with what would happen.

Helen smiled ruffling her little sisters hair before turning toward the sailor moving seductively, a panther about to pounce on her meal. A flash of white and her sharpen teeth sank into the burly arm of the sailor blood squirted in rivets around them. Helen beamed as the harden flesh touched her pallet, the liquid red gold rushed past her begging lips.  Then the moment ended as the sailor began to scream.  Can't a girl murder a sailor without them screaming? It's like they Don't want to die, such ungrateful pigs.  she thought bitterly. The sailor moaned " No- No please stop. Your hurting me. please spare me, show me mercy!" he bellowed.

Helen looked disdainfully over to the whimpering lard of flesh and bone. No this wouldn't do at all. " You talk to much" she stated simply, with a flick of her wrist her stained hands clutch the thin tendons of flesh. She ignored the gurgling sailor and turned to Rosen " care for some vocal cords? their quite delicious" she said setting them in her sisters hand.  While her sister munched on the tendons she began her work separating the good meat from the bad and sharing it with each one. Soon their was nothing left but gnawed white bones, even the marrow was gone.

Nala smiled. " Now the quick way" she said leaving to round of another one of their juicy pigs for slaughter.

**********************************

Nala entered the pen once more and saw the two brothers. she took the one that helped them. leaving the last for Rosen, lucky girl the best yet she thought.

She directed the young man to stand still and smiled to Rosen, " The quick way is getting the good part now and saving the rest for later, or sharing it like Helen did. Now you can either cut the wrist, throat or just take the whole head off. Whatever you want" she chimed.

She moved knowing she didn't have to toy like Helen did, it was simply him or her. With a simply flick of her sharpen nails the deed was done. She latched her lips across his throat and breathed in the liquid red gold until nothing else dripped out, whipping away the excess off her mouth she again divided up the rest for later. handing Rosen a heart, it was always her favorite.

Helen smiled, " Now go on lure yours in" she said lovingly.

Rosen nodded skipping out of the room toward the last men.

**********************************

Rosen looked to Jonas and smiled " Come with me" she chimed giddy.

Jonas stared at her trying hard not to, every being in his body wanted to leap, " I rather not" he said groaning.

Rosen looked smiling, she never expected this, maybe she did it wrong. she placed a soft hand and wrapped it around his" Lets go silly its time to play" she beamed and with some effort pulling him back in the room.

**********************************

Rosen smiled at her sisters, " Do we have to kill this one? He's so cute can we keep him as a pet?" she asked

Helen looked at her sister in disbelief, " Rosen that's not how things work" she said.

Rosen shook her head " No I want him, I want him , I want him" She cried in a tantrum.

Nala groaned hating to hear her sister upset. " Fine, Helen grab me the jar beside you and the rope. " she directed. she looked straight to Jonas " Don't move until you wake up darling" she said watching as his figure stiffen. With experience came skill.

Helen returned with the jar and handed it to Nala. " if he's going to be a pet he's going to have to look like one. " she stated.  setting the jar down she moved through the bones finding the ones she needed. once that job was done she moved placing them securely on him. creating a body out of bones, nothing else showing but his black shirt and jeans. Then she went to finish the next task and took a sharp knife and made a deep cut on her pale wrist. black tar fell into the jar quickly filling it up. " Helen, Rosen pry open his mouth" she ordered.

The two nodded taking both sides of his jaws an ripping his lips apart and tilting his head back.

Nala nodded and moved beginning to dump the content of the jar down the boy's lips and watched as his neck budged as he swallowed. " Good boy" she chimed.

Lastly, was a skull of a beast, so he forgot he was a man. That would be the tricky part. aha there it was she thought a bear's skull found from a wreckage of a ship years ago. she moved back placing the head on top of the boy and secured it in place. There we go one berserker to be the best pet a siren could ask for she thought.

" When he wakes up he'll be the best pet you can ask for" she said.

**********************************

12 years later:

Jonas laughed as he raced around the cave with Rosen his four limbs working rampantly to propel him further. He was to involved that he almost knocked over Helen who was fixing dinner.

Helen growled " What did I tell you Jonas, no playing when im fixing dinner" she said

Jonas whimpered nodding " Yes Helen, do you need any help?" I ask, he always loved helping his family.

Helen smiled the anger lost in her eyes, " Why not, now you know what to do right?" she asked. She had to give credit to Nala, having Jonas here as their pet was great, she had never seen Rosen so happy before.

Jonas nodded " Yes Helen" he said and glanced at their dinner. He was a middle aged balding man. His edam's apple bounced up and down in lust, his eyes trained on Helen no one else.

He moved his dagger claws ready and with a few strikes the man fell apart in a bloody mess of limbs.

Helen smiled scratching behind Jonas ear " That's a good boy" she beamed.

Nala entered the room smiling " Alright time to eat" she said handing out equal amounts to everyone, leaving Rosen and Jonas to split the heart.

What an amazing Family.

Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
godlypopo
Review
godlypopo wrote a review Review · Dec 28, 2014

Hello, happy review day!

I really liked the story that trailed behind this at the beginning. It was a very interesting piece to read. By using the greek gods and goddesses, the story receives that ancient feel to it :D I like how you talked of the father of the three girls as more sympathetic than the mother as that is what you would expect to happen. However, If you really wanted to go for the unexpected, or match the time this seems to be set I would change it to the mother being sympathetic and the father banishing them as for hundreds of years men didn't give a second thought about women. This is just a suggestion, however, the story is fine as it is. I do feel that your descriptions weaken a tiny bit once you reach the dialogue as you seem to focus more on that than the actual story itself. My only other thing for you to do is to re-read it and search for any grammatical errors. E.g. 'There once was three' should be 'There once were three'.

Overall, this was a great read but I do feel it is more fantasy and supernatural than horror :p

That's all from me,
Godly

Thanks and that is an awesome idea :)

User avatar
Rosendorn
Review
Rosendorn wrote a review Review · Dec 28, 2014

Hello.

Just an fyi, I edited the star breaks so they were shorter; they were causing the story to scroll side to side, which was pretty distracting to read!

Onto the content of the story itself.

First off, your dialogue punctuation needs some work. You're using periods when you should be using commas, and it's really distracting. Go through that article then apply it to your writing; it'll make it much more readable.

Related to your dialogue, you use a lot of words other than "said". Some people don't like "said" because it's used so much, but its frequent use means you don't notice the word and instead focus on the dialogue itself. As soon as you use another word, you draw attention to the word itself, to how the words are said, which can be very distracting when every single statement is marked with a different word. Using other words besides said also means you're less likely to use body language to explain how a character says something, which means you're robbing yourself of really important characterization opportunities in terms of how a person stands and moves when they say something. Only 7% of communication is the words— the rest is how they're said and body language.

I noticed this is meant to be horror. Unfortunately you're not really hitting the mark when it comes to horror proper. Your beginning is weak, without really much of a hook or a fear factor to it. This article goes more into beginnings. You need to give us something interesting and really attention grabbing for a start, which this really doesn't do.

As for horror, here is an article about what makes horror a genre.

Overall, this is an interesting premise, but you've got some basic execution errors that are really hampering this as a horror short story.

Hope this helps. Let me know if you have any questions or comments.

~Rosey



It's easier to come up with new stories than it is to finish the ones you already have. I think every author would feel that way.
— Stephanie Meyer