my heart is torn

Hey there, I'm Rachaella! This is a really nice poem you got here. I can really relate to what you're saying and I like how personal it is. It felt like you were pouring your entire emotions into a single piece writing in something like a journal (or in this case, the Internet) and I really love it. However, the only thing is I have a problem is sort of the rhyming pattern. You occasionally rhymed in the second and fourth line of each verse and not the first and third ones. I would of preferred it if there wasn't really a rhyme to it and it would've made it even more heartfelt and connected. But overall, I love the poem and I hope to see your work again.

Hi, nice poem!

I was instantly drawn in by the title as it sounded very appealing. You got the emotions across very well, and it was very heartfelt, and I like poems that have a sense of passion in them. I felt like the last line was very effective. Not sure exactly why, but it really worked. A couple of things that you could maybe revisit, but obviously this is just my opinion. First of all, I felt like the rhythm didn't flow as well as it could. It kept changing in every stanza and it just didn't quite fit together quite right. I also feel like a few of the lines were just written in that way that they were so they'd rhyme. Lines like:

"he doesn't play nice"

just didn't quite carry the same emotion as some of the others did. I also noticed in your fifth stanza, you broke out of the rhyming scheme. It just broke the flow slightly.

However, the poem was very heartfelt and nice and easy to read.

Well done!

Hey I'm here for a review.

This poem to me is very heart-touching. It positions itself firmly within the universal theme of unrequited love. Yet it seems the poet is left with a little bit of hope through the very last line requesting the lover to "stay".

The attempt taken to make the reader feel emotional is quite successful. The simple diction makes it easy to comprehend. The emotionally charged words (like "love", "hope") along with the title itself is able to create a melancholic tone.

The repetition of the words "you" and "I" makes it obvious that the poet is talking just about them.

Having a simple rhyming scheme (A-B, A-B) is impressive making the poem sound better when read.

The poem repeats the title twice which furthermore suggests the heartbroken nature of the poet.

I enjoyed reading this!
Guess you've done a great job. Keep it up

This poem is very good. I love the flow and choice of words. Also, I think the length is also a good factor in this poem, so yay you!! You can really write nicely

Hey Lylas,

First Impressions: Well, it definitely classifies as a "Love Poem," no doubt about that. A little bit more on the "bluesy" side, but still classic. This seems like something that would be in a sort of post-rap song, because it's not quite edgy enough to classify as real rap, but it doesn't quite have that elegant feel of a full blown poem. Sort of alternative, I suppose.

Positives: Good flow. It starts at the start and ends at the end, so no problem there. Your struck of A-B, A-B is simple, but consistent. The number of syllables don't count out, but if you were using this as spoken poetry, then it wouldn't be a problem.

Negatives: While everyone loves a good love song, (or poem, in this case,) we've all heard so many of them. This poem doesn't have anything unique or interesting about it, meaning, it's just like all the rest.

Of course, that doesn't detract from the face value at all, but it doesn't quite make it the next best thing. A slight change to make it catch the eye, or the mind could go a long way.

Overall: Not much else to say as it's hard to grade poetry, especially when it's all just emotions put on paper.

I give it: