Published October 11, 2007
(Verse 1)
It’s funny how disappointing it seems.
How could she miss such an obvious thing,
To confuse her dreams with reality?
She only wanted something more,
But disappointment pushed her to the floor,
(Chorus: the pronoun “she” is changed each time the chorus is sung: 1st time: she, 2nd time: he, 3rd time, I)
Cause she’s a dreamer,
She hopes for better things
For the world, including her friends
And her family.
Oh she’s such a dreamer,
But she sees a bright future
If we only had a dream,
If only others shared her dream.
(Verse 2)
It’s funny how blind we can be,
To our own sin and shortcomings
But when he’s dreaming he can see (so clearly)
If we had the urge to change,
There could be much better days.
(Chorus, then Bridge)
(Bridge)
But who ever defends these honest visionaries,
And among you who will hearken to their call?
Cassandra cried out to her people
“Destruction is near,”
But no one heard her at all.
But destruction came on their
Disbelief.
And honestly
I can see
Similar things
In us.
And I tell you this because (chorus)
Is this way too cliche? It has a pretty melody, but as a reader do they mean anything to you? Critiques welcome.
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140,588 Literary Works • 673,542 Reviews
It sounds good! I'd like to hear it sung
Although, if your doing Bridge > Chorus then it's better off to take out the last 'Because'
Or other wise it may sound stupid...
And I tell you this because 'Cause she's/he's/I'm a dreamer.
Because 'cause.
It depends on the tempo of the beat and how it's sung i suppose though.
gah, i'm not a musician, so i'm not the person to ask. but i am a music lover, and i really liked this.
i wish i could hear the melody. it sounds like it would start out slow and pick up speed during the chorus.
I'm terrible at lyric critiquing, but I'll give it a shot.
I liked this, overall, and it seemed very tuneful (is that even a word? If so, it's really badly used, in this case). The first stanza was definitely the best, and after that it fizzled a little.
In the chorus, the word "dream" was used far too many times [most noticeable in the last two lines; after which the previous "dream"s popped out a bit more], but that was the only low point.
Overall, good work.
Peace, love, chocolate,
Muffin
I'm no good at lyrics, but I liked these. It wasn't too cliche, and the actual words were really nice. The only thing I can complain about was I had a really hard time finding a suitable tune, but I guess when you only have lyrics it does make it hard.
I'm not very good at lyrics, but I think this was actually nice.
Too cliche? No I don't think so. This is only my un-professional opinion though. But I think it's got a lot of meaning and it's nice. And I wish I could even begin to imagine the melody to this. It's probably really nice.
Anyways, good job. keep it up!
Lots O' Luv,
Lindsay