Printer

Funny!
It was really really nice, but I noticed you did not mention the 'printer' anywhere in the poem, other than the title.
The ending was hilarious in a very abrupt way.
I enjoyed the way your sentences were so short and direct, yet expressed so much.
And most importantly, the ENTIRE idea on our never-helping printers was genius!

Keep writing!

Hello there,

I thought this poem was a relief for other readers, to know their not the only ones who's printers are a struggle. Even though I'm still living with my parents, I still have to use our printer for school work. Either it takes forever, or the ink runs out. Overall this was a great and funny poem for me to read. I think we need a printer upgrade, don't we?

~cassaundra~

That was hilarious. It made me smile about a million times and I totally agree with you. My printer NEVER WORKS!!!!! It's either that we're out of ink or it is just being slow to annoy us. PRINTERS ARE THE DEVIL'S TOOLS!!!!! Why do we even need them? They just take up space wherever you put them and they never do what you want them to do!! Who invented printers, anyway??? They shouldn't have, whoever they are out there. Grrrrr.........

hey!

sorry to say but your piece confused me a lot. the only lines where i laughed were -

"Are you dying?

You bastard."

The only thing that i could make out from it was your anger.

the good part it was personified. i liked the way you used a daily routine thing to bring out humor.
nice effort! keep up the spirit.

just as i say -

keep dreaming! keep writing!

Oh, I love this piece. I adore how you made the printer out to be someone that was once a confidant, describing your disappointment and anger. "You were supposed to be my partner, stay by my side at troubled times." It almost sounds like you are trying to get attention from someone that you admired, but they forgot about you. I also like your play on words, such as "your emotions have turned black and white, as has your skin." And your funny ending, short and concise, is hilarious: "you bastard." Well done, thanks for the laugh!

Wow! Bravo! This is the kind of stuff that makes my day. Your humor is so... on point. This is how I feel when my printer is being a jerk. I really like the beginning when you used single words. I believe it added more depth to the poem. I was blown away at how you made a everyday object comedic. I bet thats what a lot of people think when their printer dies, and you made those thoughts into a poem. A very good poem indeed. It made my day.

Printers.Are.Hitler.Personified! I completely 100% agree...
They are the most disgruntled of all gadgets!! This poem bought back so many memories of me fighting, pleading, bribing (yes, i did bribe my inanimate gadget), shouting and reasoning with my printer.
I love the way you start the story, slowly easing into your frustration with your printer!
And i especially love the fact that you used the word solitude and not loneliness (just another odd quirk of mine)
And the ending?!?! I could literally imagine you fixating a cold-blooded stare at your printer and saying those two words with all the venom you can conjure! Rather animated!!
I really enjoyed it!!

In the words of Benedict in Much Ado About Nothing, "There's a double meaning it that."
I have one little nitpick in order to preserve the double meaning. that is the line "Humming and buzzing, and making all my worries go away." This bit doesn't seem to match the twin meaning you've been setting up. Also I have another problem with this line and the next, specifically the line ends. I don't like "making" or "I am" at the end of the line, don't put a verb at the end of a line unless you have a specific technique in mind.
Next point, I would recommend joining lines five and six with a comma rather than using a full stop, I believe it would flow better.
Also, I think you need a comma to join lines seven and eight, at the moment you have no punctuation there.
Finally, there are a couple of tweaks I would make to the ending of this work. Firstly, rather than have "Your emotions have turned black// and white, as has your skin." I think it would flow better as "Your skin and emotions have turned black and white."
The next point about the ending is I think the penultimate line could be improved by having "dying?" on a separate line. And finally, I suggest that you shorten the last line simply to "Bastard." if you'll pardon my French.
All in all, a good job. I like double meanings and cross purposes, and I know how hard it is to write them, so I'll give this probably 7.4 out of 10.
Yours in reviewing,
The Fiend.

Hellooo. I only have a few criticisms, and then we can get to the happy stuff!
I've already seen others point out the non-capitalized 'I,' so I won't worry about that. Your punctuation is good, grammar is also good. Everything's spelled correctly, and really the only problem I had with it was that some of the lines were broken in a way that confused me until I read it over again. Overall, the form was good. At some points the flow became a little wonky, but nothing major. Maybe work on your word choices so that the lines are a little longer.

This is so accurate! Having a dysfunctional printer is so irritating, and I like the way you wrote this. It brings back memories of fighting my old printer. Some of them just don't want to work... A shame. I'm glad this was in the humor category, because it really was funny. Not in a knock-knock joke way, but in a way that was almost 'Yeah, I've been there...'

Great job.

Hello! Zhia here for a Helpful (hopefully) Review! Let's get started, shall we?

First of all, THIS IS SO TRUE! Printers are EVIL. This poem is just perfect. I like how you start off with insults, then you get to asking angry questions. It was really funny, like you probably intended it to be.

2nd, nitpicks! Or rather, nitpick, "And when i try to force feed you" should be "And when I try to force feed you" And that's it.

This was a great poem , a hilarious poem, and so many adjectives could describe it, it's crazy! Thank you SO MUCH for this incredibly funny and amazing read,

Zhia

This review was brought to you by team Reviewing is the New Black!

This is hilarious; you kept the tone so serious till the end, making it even funnier when I remember you're talking about a printer! The only mistake I noticed was here: "And when i try and force feed you" the I should be capitalized. Actually... I've noticed that some poets choose to leave their I's lowercase on purpose, so if that was your intention, nevermind!
Anyways, great poem! It's good to see some humor in the poetry category

Hello! KatyaElefant here for another review! Happy Review Day! Let's see what we have here.

Somethings that just are bugging me when I read this are organization and capitalization. You certainly need to organize your poem in to stanzas so that it can be read easily. If you don't know how to do that, you just put periods in between them(but I can already guess that you know how to do this because you have 5 stars already XD). For the capitalization, I think that you should start each line with a capital letter because it looks much better that way. I wish that you would have talked about the annoyance of pushing the buttons to make a fax because that is so annoying. My parents make me do that and it's just tiring to do.

I really love the idea of this poem. It really deserves a like(*likes*). My printer is especially annoying because it's slow, it's right under my white board(so I have to squirm to write anything on there) and it only prints in black in white. My printer is surely a jerk because it never wants to work. Your grammar and spelling is really good in this poem. I don't know if it is necessary to put that punctuation at the end but I like it. I think that this is a really good poem. We all want to beat up our printers with a hammer or a chain saw(I would probably choose an atomic bomb). Have a nice Review Day! Keep calm and keep writing!

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Hilarious!!!!
Oh my goodness, I can not stop laughing right now!
You see, poems like this a very memorable!
So much simplicity but so relatable!!

I love how you personify the printer.

"What is wrong with you?

You don't eat anything,

you don’t talk.

And when i try to force feed you

you cough up your dark blood."

And by the language you use in your poem, you seem so serious. I can just imagine you speaking to the printer, getting frustrated with it as if you had had a long relationship and s/he just "...abandoned [you]…"
Oh how I can't stop laughing! The last word especially had me rolling out of my chair!!

I Love Love LOVED this poem and I know I will end up reading it again just for a good laugh! Keep writing! You've earned yourself a new faithful follower!!

This poem is SO funny! I love the seriousness of a dying printer and the emotional connection between it and the writer. Keep writing!

EPICnumber1 her for a review...

Ok I laughed at the end I don't know if it was suppoed to be funny though I don't think it is but I laughed anyway.

Great poem reminds me of my own printer lol

I love how you started off with just single words then used phrases which I thought was a great effect.

Try to put it in stanzas it looks better and sounds better maybe every four lines/ But if you think thats rubbish just ignore me.

Love the words you used they really fit.

"And when i try to force feed you" the I needs to be capitialised.

Overall this is a great poem not many errors

Keep writing...


-EPICnumber1