When I was in 4th grade,about 2 or 3 years ago,my mom was a addict.At the time,she had my sister Sarah(about 1 or 2), my other sister Faith(4), my brother Steven(5) and me. Also, those ages are at that specific time. Not the present. She had met this guy at a rehab center she was at and to me, they instantly clicked. Now, what my definition of ‘clicked’ is, may differ from yours because at that specific time, I didn’t know what love was.
After a while, they had gotten together but she had stayed out too late almost every night and I became the Mom. Faith and Sarah’s first word was my nickname that everyone had called me. ‘Dezi or Desi.’ I had to do the cooking, and the cleaning and changing bed sheets and other jobs while trying to be a 4th grader.
Then, she had gotten pregnant. She didn’t want the baby and at the time, I didn’t understand why. She carried on with the pregnancy until the baby was born. It was a girl and the father named her Hope. I had always thought my mom named her because she wanted the name to go along with Faith and Destinie.
Hope was the cutest baby I had ever seen. Yes, cuter than my other siblings. But, I still had the responsibility of being the mom. And since it had been a long while, I had gotten better and started to like it. I cared for all of them the way I would my own kids.
But then I remember the day Hope’s grandmother, her Dad’s mother, came to get her. My friend was there and we had cried from the time we had woke and from the time we had went back to sleep. I remember asking Hope’s dad to take a picture of Hope,my friend and I. I still have the picture today but nothing will ever be the same again. I grew up way too fast but if none of that ever happened, I wouldn’t be who I am today.
We’ve all seen Hope since she’s left but it doesn’t replace the hole in our hearts. Now, she’s either 3 or 4 and having the life I want her to have. Our Mom is doing much better and is not an addict like she was. My Mom still says that I’m her best friend and if it wasn’t for me, she probably wouldn’t have made it.
I’m happy with the life I have now because I learned to accept it and I’m not going to do the same thing to my kids because I want them to have the life I never had. But now that everything’s done happened, I’ve put it in the past and I hope everyone else can too.
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!!
First Impression: Well...that was quite a story there....did like it though...that ending was quite a hopeful one and its a story that shows strengths, terrible situations but people overcome them without letting themselves fall and I love that.
Anyway let's get right to it,
Okay....well...starting off here with quie a paragraph there...lot of things happening there all at once. Hmm...might almost have a little too much stuff here for just being a first chapter...but then its not too over the top. It does establish the backstor there so mehh...a little on the fence about whether its okay or not.
Well...that doesn't sound very good at all...definitely not an ideal situation you want to be in as a fourth grader...well...let's see where this story is going. So far its rough but I have a feeling the worst here is yet to come.
Well...that's a fun way to name your children. Although that's an interesting contradiction there saying she didn't want the baby but then she ends up going through with it anyway and even coming up with a matching name...well...this is continuing to just get more interesting.
Well...that's a little sweet at least...not too bad to see in the middle of all these terrible things happening all around us here.
Okay...well...that's an interesting little twist...the pacing kind of sped up a touch there....but its working for the moment...relatively I guess let's see how this ends I suppose.
Oh well...a bit of a bittersweet ending then...at least the future for all our characters here appears to be quite a bright one so I'm satisfied with that...oh well...you can't really have everything you hope for after all. But its better than I thought it would be, so that's always a plus.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
Overall: Overall...it was a nice little story. It had everything you could really ask from something like this and I did enjoy reading, so on the whole I think this is pretty good here.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
Hey, I'm going to review!
I'm going to start from the bottom up. I liked it because you really didn't talk much about drama and all that. But I also didn't see a lot of sensory language (which I know might be hard considering what the circumstances are), and then except for the part about Hope, I didn't see many happy points in your life. Surely, there was something good at school or something like that. I also noticed that a lot of your sentences run on. Try and break them up, or readers aren't going to remember it. But good job!