hey so I am here for the review
so let's start from the beginning , you have little grammar mistakes , but that's not very much of a big deal, you can always use Grammarly app to correct them , some of them are
= Roberto loved the stories of the past and present stories
you have used the word story twice , only one time is enough
=And an elf princess form
its from not form
= And he woke up as he woke up
=his finger at his candle next to his bed
no need for 3 his
=woke up Shanle his guardian. And told him what all had happened. Then
woke his guardian up and told him all that had happened
=the older magician as he whispered
the older magician whispered or if you want to use ( as he) you have to add what was happening with the magician speaking
These are some of the grammar mistakes, I will not point out all of them but like I said in the beginning grammar is not the biggest problem with this story.
the main problem is that it has no structure of a story, there is no pace of how things are taking place everything is happening suddenly, there is no clear description of what is happening or where it's happening.
it might sound harsh, but this story doesn't feel like a story it seems more like a summary of a movie that a child is explaining.
I suppose Eng is not your first language so don't worry about the grammar and sentences mistake with time this will improve.
and for the story structure and writing I suggest you read first, read as much books as you can , if you want to write a fantasy story then read fantasy books, and read with open mind don't belittle yourself for not understanding some of the sentences or things , try small and easy ones first build your confidence and then try hard books ,read them and look how they explaining a situation, how the writers of the books introduces the character , how they change scene how they describe the emotion of the characters , read and make notes about it then use it yourself when writing, it won't be easy but with practice you will become the best version of yourself
don't lose confidence, masters have failed more times beginner has ever tried.
So keep writing.