Published March 26, 2016
A large mural showcasing a tambourine frowning
hangs over my head as I sleep.
I could hear it sing to me five hours a day
as I sit cross legged on my floor,
making a puzzle that's supposed to be a dog
but it looks like a fish.
I look at my phone, a reminder that
I'm only depressed because
I have nothing else to do
and that I only go around in circles
with things that have hurt me in the past.
"you should be happy,
you're at the top of your game.
You established a character
and reputation for yourself.
Don't ruin it by thinking you're less
than what you really are".
Fists aren't harmonious
when they're right hooks,
sloppy and drunken to the beat
of the newest synth pop song.
I knock myself down because
I don't want to disappoint;
bad publicity is still publicity,
but it does nothing
to revive your legacy.
I stopped talking to the phone
and the tambourine.
The dog/fish stares me in the eyes,
screaming and screaming for
bittersweet euthanasia.
Five minutes and a couple tears later,
I have a rag over my mouth as I lay
over 500 puzzle pieces.
The tambourine has a slight smile,
its eyes piercing through my skull.
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Canary word: Present
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139,784 Literary Works • 672,764 Reviews
Hi, Fandomsnmusic here to do a review!
Wow. This poem is really cool! I admire the way you can make free verse work. Not everybody can, and you did a really great job making it work out! You did great with putting in punctuation for the poem and you have a great variety of word choice.
Although the poem itself is great, the end seems a bit rushed and I think you could make it a little longer and not seem like it all came to a stop too suddenly. Just my opinion of course, but I think you could make it better.
You don't have any spelling errors, and all your grammar is good, so all I have to say is great job and keep up the good work!
Never stop writing,
fandomsnmusic
Marvelous piece of poetry. I was lost in the words. The feelings and emotions you carved on such a way that it touched one's heart. I have come here to review but I dont have such nice knowldge to criticise it. In simple I wanna say. That O like your penning really. Be true to yourself n i ll will be reading you more often.keep it ip. Blessing!