Published April 19, 2011
I am a little cupcake,
I'm so sweet and bright.
Please don't eat me!
Us cupcakes don't bite.
You think you want to eat me,
I know you don't. 
Please don't eat me!
But fight you I won't.
As I sit on the bench,
I see you and sigh.
Please don't eat me!
I secretly cry.
From the bench you lift me,
My dooms day for sure.
Please don't eat me!
I try hard to roar.
I assume you heard me,
You put me down.
Please don't eat me!
You step back and frown.
I gaze out the window,
You look there too.
The morning sun,
Looks back at you
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140,252 Literary Works • 673,073 Reviews
Hi Cupcake! Here to review as requested! ^^
First of all, I'll just say that this was a very cute, fun to read poem. There isn't much I can review on for-fun poems, as they're not serious or really meant for constructive criticism, so I apologize in advance for how short this review will be.
As I just said, I did enjoy reading this, but there was one line that I didn't really like.
It just.... didn't really fit right. It sounded like a forced rhyme, whereas most of the other ones sounded natural and cute - as they should sound. I'd just check your wording there.
Another thing that I am going to be nit-picky about are the last few lines. They just didn't really seem to fit that well with the rest of the poem, if you know what I mean. It goes from a cupcake trying not to be eaten, and all of a sudden somebody's staring out the window. I don't know, it just doesn't fit.
Otherwise, I really did like this. Thanks for the request!
Keep writing,
~~Ish.
Aww, thanks guys!!!!
HA!!!! This was adorable! =) I tried so hard not to laugh (in class, haha). I truly did enjoy this sweet little piece. Nothing nit-picky to report (you're only twelve, and in all honestly, this is definitely age appropriate). You are doing poetry far better than myself, if that tells you anything about my works, haha! This was very cute, and I loved it.
~Panda;;
well I loved it I don't care what anyone elts thinks you did great!!!
Okay. So this piece did make me laugh and it would be perfect for a children's book =]. It was really cute and for a twelve year old it was really good. =] Your ability to see things from other object's and peoples perspectives is going to help you out in the future. Keep up the good work, it was cute =]