The Siren's Story- Chapter 4

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Rickie didn’t protest as I took him to the hallowed mountain that contained the palace. Mostly, he just looked at everything in awe, and he bugged his eyes at the sight of Zale, in his shellfish armor and the non-magical trident that he carried. They must have been on high alert, if he was wearing armor. Maybe there had been barracuda sightings. As it were, I pulled the speechless Rickie toward Zale and told the guards, “This is the Human that His Grace wanted to see. I am on royal business. Let me through.” I spoke in English, so as not to pull anything too surprising on Rickie yet. He was still in awe of just breathing down here.

           

Zale smirked at me, his black eyes shining with humor as he dragged the entrance boulder away. He caught me by the arm as I was swimming through, saying, “If you’ll be at the palace for a while, would you like to take a trip into Atlantis with me?”

           

Rickie was pulling me along like an eager child, so I just said, “I’ll see what His Grace will decide. But I do need a vacation. Badly.” We swam down the corridor, Zale’s laughter ringing through the hallway.

           

Rickie tried to drag me behind him, but the fact was that his legs were of no use underwater. They were thin, feeble, and unnatural looking. Whereas my fin was solid muscle, perfect for dragging Human boys along through the halls so they wouldn’t get too distracted. There was much time for him to explore later. Now was the time for meeting Neptune.

           

I stopped his just outside the Grand Doors, telling him carefully, “You are about to meet King Neptune. Just follow everything that I do, and he will probably let you live.”

           

As I combed through my hair once, I heard Rickie mutter, “Sound like a nice dude.”

           

I shot him a confused look at the word “dude” and pulled him through the beautifully adorned doors, not acknowledging the bows from the pages. They were everywhere, always bowing to those higher than them. It was impossible to notice all of them. Besides, it was their job to help us. Eventually, they would become full-fledged bodyguards, and the new pages would bow to them.

           

The entire royal family was in the Throne Room. The King, Merrick, his younger brother, Santus, and their older sister, Pax. I went through the ceremony, showing Rickie how to kiss their hands. He seemed especially hesitant at kissing Merrick’s hands. I swam to the middle of the room, pulling Rickie into a bow with me as King Neptune’s voice thundered out, “So, this is the boy Rickie Miller that you said can see the Mer? Come child, lift your head and look at me.”

           

He was talking to Rickie, so I stayed in my bow, tilting my head up just enough to see Neptune’s face. The creases in his skin seemed especially tired, almost deflated. He had trimmed his beard, and it oddly made him seem older. Rickie’s eyes were wide and shining, his mouth was hanging half open, as if he was trying to speak, but words wouldn’t come out. Neptune’s voice was frightening, but only to people who didn’t know him. Rickie looked scared out of his wits, but I could hear the tired edge to it. “Rickie Miller. So my Siren’s song doesn’t affect you. We must find out what you are. Tell me, do you know who your parents are?”

           

“Well, y-yes, I-I….” He was shaking, almost hyperventilating, so I clutched his hand tighter.

           

Neptune interrupted his stuttering, sounding stern and-if it was possible-a little awed. “Do you know for sure that your parents are really your parents?”

           

They all stared at Rickie, who was trying to find his words, except for me. I kept my head bowed until Neptune called me out of my ridiculous bow. But for now I was bent over, as if broken in half. “I-I didn’t know my real Dad. He left before I was born. I have a step-father, though. And for all I care, he’s my real dad.”

           

Neptune seemed to be deliberating something and he told me absently, as if he had just noticed me, “Nerin, you may straighten.” We all watched anxiously as Neptune swan in a circuit around the room, reaching the wall, then going back to his throne, and doing it all over again. He clutched the huge, pure bronze Trident, the sharpened ends gleaming wickedly. If only Rickie knew how much danger he was really in. Neptune could very easily have him killed, and then we would be done with this whole mess.

           

But he didn’t. Instead, Neptune snapped his fingers, which brought a pair of trembling pages forward. He said to them, “Show this Human to his room. Make sure that he uses one of our Wind Rooms, or else he would drown.”

           

The Wind Rooms were a collection of rooms inside the castle that were filled with huge bubbles of air. If we had underwater mammals visiting, we would often let them use those rooms to breathe. I hated them, because every time I entered one, I felt the same drowning in air feeling that I had whenever I went on my watches. The two small pages clutched Rickie’s hands and led him away, and I stretched my stiff fingers. To hold somebody’s hand for days made one tired.

           

Now that Rickie was gone, I asked Neptune, “Am I to go back to my watch, or am I to stay at the palace. Either way, I need some sleep. I’ve been awake for two straight days, and I fear I’m going to collapse.” There was a beat as Neptune turned toward me, so I added quickly, “But if you need me to stay awake, then I will. I’ll just need to comb my hair more often.” I franticly ran the comb through my hair, the effects of poison not breaking through my pure exhaustion.

           

My eyes were half open as Neptune told me, “I wish for you to stay here, Nerin. And get some sleep. I need you wind awake tomorrow.”

         

   I gratefully bowed and was about to swim to my rooms when a thought came to my groggy mind. I turned and asked, “Your Grace, am I allowed to know why you need me awake tomorrow?”

           

Neptune’s back was to me, and he answered without turning, “We’re going to find out who the Human’s father is. I fear that a traitor had a child with a Human woman.”

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LemonyIce
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Gill!

Ooh, this is getting better and better! Buuut, a couple of typos here and there.

Rickie didn’t protest as I took him to the hallowed mountain that contained the palace.


"Hallowed" or "Hollowed"? I'm not sure about this.

Mostly, he just looked at everything in awe, and he bugged his eyes at the sight of Zale


"Bugged"?

I stopped his him just outside the Grand Doors,


The creases in his skin made him seemed especially tired, almost deflated.


Rickie looked scared out of his wits, but I could hear the tired edge to it.


This confused me. Rickie hasn't spoken yet, so how can Nerin hear the tired edge to his voice? I think you were talking about Neptune's voice, here.

We all watched anxiously as Neptune swanm in a circuit around the room
,

I asked Neptune, “Am I to go back to my watch, or am I to stay at the palace? Either way, I need some sleep. I’ve been awake for two straight days, and I fear I’m going to collapse.” There was a beat as Neptune turned toward me


A beat? A beat of what? Her heart? You need to mention that.

And get some sleep. I need you wind wide awake tomorrow.”


They're just typos, and I'm being picky, but I think you should change them.

Besides that, I like how the plot thickens. 8D The novel's becoming really interesting to read.
Keep up the good work!
~Lemony/ formerly HPR

Thanks! I'll be the first to admit that I suck at editing! Anything that the spell check doesn't put a little line under, I usually don't notice! I guess that I'll just need to be a little more observant. :)



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