*In the spirit of Valoween, I am posting this song/poem based off the 1986 movie “Labyrinth”. This is underneath my folder titled “Labyrinth 1986 fanfics”. Gacha Club character designs are under this forum: https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/viewtopic.php?f=27&t=116005&start=1155. Oh and the last two words is actually the title of a song from the movie, except “her” is “you” in the actual song. There are other references to the movie in the song too. Anyway…enjoy!*
Sarah’s a girl all caught up in her dreams
Just a girl who wants to feel seen
So many rules and so many responsibilities
Why does joy have to end so suddenly?
That screaming baby won’t keep his mouth shut
He’s her little brother and she has to take care of him like a mother
Oh, why can’t she live a fantasy?
Dance with creatures that rip off their heads
Fall through a twisting hole of helping hands
In a labyrinth that isn’t really a labyrinth
Friends with a coward whose got heart
Leading a scared beast to safety
And fighting alongside a noble-spirited fox
That could all be hers
If she just let the Goblin King keep him
The Goblin King of the labyrinth
With his magic crystals of many promises
And his most lavish balls of many masks
The peril and the pretty
The agony of freedom
Horror and happiness
All of it, just for human, mortal Sarah
Sarah, still holding fast to her childlike hopes
Reaching towards a brother she never really wanted gone
And oh, how her heart yearns for all that glorious adventure!
Who wouldn’t want to sink into the Goblin King’s arms?
Tall, blond, and dashing, he’s almost like a Prince
But he can be cruel
Just as he can be kind
And he does not know what real love is
Try as he might
He’s moved the cosmos and raised Hell
He’s made it hard enough to hurt
But easy enough to go on
He made a glittering ball of masks and mayhem
Again, all of it for Sarah
No one else but Sarah
He became her Dark Prince
And although she loves it so
She loves her brother more
To leave him in that wonderfully strange world
It’d break her heart more than anything on Earth ever could
Because while growing up has not the mystique of a fairytale
It has the magic of the mundane
The Goblin King’s a soft and seductive fantasy
But his love will never be as real as her family
And at the end of the day
He has no power over her
Her dreams were always hers
She can have her desires without leaving her loved ones behind
Everything she’s ever wanted
Was home this whole time
The Goblin King must retreat back to her mind
His immortal heart broken
But memories of her will never be a blur
Because he’ll keep watch of her with his crystals
Within her
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Canary word: Present
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WAAHHHH HI THERE IM REVIEWING THIS NOW!!
WAHHH I LOVE THIS MOVIE SO MUCH EEEE
I SHOULD PROBABLY TURN OFF MY CAPS LOCK TO BE HONEST
okay I love this. Though this might not actually be a review because I was going to review and then I decided I don't have the brain power but I love this so much like actually. So yess.
ANYWAY my brain is in overdrive at this point, love the poem, i'm gonna sleep now byeeee
--Eli
I%u2019m glad you like it!
WAHHH THE %u2019 is BACK AT IT AGAIN
yep
Hiya creeperfeverdreams!!
Back at it AGAIN!!!! Hop here with a review!! This is like your third notification from me!!! Are you sick of my username yet, lol? Anyway, AGAIN I'M EXCITED TO READ THIS BECAUSE IT'S A POEM!!!!! So what are we waiting for??? Let's jump right in!!!!!!
OMG WAIT A GOD DARN MINUTE I'M LITERALLY SO THANKFUL YOU JUST MADE ME FIND A MOVIE I'D BEEN TRYING TO FIND FOR THREE YEARS THAT I WATCHED AND ENJOYED WHEN I WAS LITTLE. NO JOKE I WAS LOOKING EVERWHERE FOR THIS MOVIE AND I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT IT WAS CALLED. I'M LITERALLY IN YOUR DEBT HOLY CRAP.
SORRY. ANYWAYS LETS CONTINUE.
This poem also just got like 10x better since i know the context for it. I really do think this just is a genuinely good reflection of the movie. You just portray it so well!!!
I was going to do a longer review but now i'm too excited ToT
Sorry TToTT
Have a good day/night!!
Love,
Hop
lol I%u2019m glad I could help you find a beloved movie. <3 Labyrinth is very cool. ^v^
Thx for reading!
Hello hello! It is I, CrimsonTears (or Crim for short)! I am here to read and review this amazing piece! Typically, I read and review as I go and so as usual, that is also how I will review your work here! Let’s dig in, shall we!
As always, I like to start with the title and genre the writer has chosen.
Girlhood and Goblins is such a fascinating title! And the fact that this is a genre of Fanfiction/Supernatural makes me even more interested in reading this! And might I add, Labyrinth is one of my favorite classic movies, so bonus points for that (and I don’t typically read much poetry so this should make you very happy!)
Anyways, moving on into the actual review here…
I like this a lot because for those who have watched the movie I have heard a lot that people don’t think Sarah is portrayed as a girl well enough and instead a older yet younger young woman. But in all reality, she really is just a girl and really does just want to be seen even though in the movie at first it is instead portrayed that she is just selfish and doesn’t want any responsibility up until you see her bedroom and notice how much of a free imagination she has and just wants to enjoy her own world.
This I think is also written very well because once again the first impressions of Sarah are proven to be incorrect in the movie as yes it seems Sarah’s imagination is innocent enough but it actually is quite vast and very detailed like this.
This is beautifully written and I believe accurately sums up the desires the Goblin King tried to present to Sarah. You also write this in a way that doesn’t give spoilers but seems to describe everything. Very well written!
I really like this line too because it just shows even more to how young Sarah really is and how innocent her mind is in the story. The Goblin King in the movie (though I’m not sure about the actual book itself) is a man and yet how he is presented to Sarah makes her so fascinated of him. Whenever she looks at him she is obviously intrigued, but also on a mission to save her brother so pushes those feelings away so I think “Dark Prince” is the most accurate way to describe the person he was to her.
I’ve told this to quite a few people and I’ll say it here too. Every time I watch the movie I catch a new detail or observe a new thought and reading your poem made yet another thought come to my mind! The movie portrays her imagination so well that it seems she is teleported into another world altogether and not instead a dream or a moment of daydreaming. But in all reality, none of what she saw or experience was real at all and truthfully was all in her mind something the directors of the movie did very well to show. Viewers get so caught up in the story that they forget this isn’t a real world she was sucked into and rather she created. Your poem lines her beautifully show this true from the movie and I like this detail very much as it’s not something I have thought about until you mentioned it!
Some critiques I have is…
1. Though I love the entire poem, I feel like the last line of the poem leaves it unfinished. The poem got so much detail but the last line ”Within her” seems like it could be missing something to make it complete like the other lines.
2. The title is "Girlhood and Goblins". While I believe the girlhood part of the title is presented thoroughly, I feel like the Goblins part doesn't hit as on point as the first part.
But now for the highlights!
1. I don’t think it needs to be said, but I’ll say it anyway in case it wasn’t obvious, lol! I LOVE THIS POEM. Again, I am not one who delves into poetry very often but you had me all the way. I love how you provoked thoughts and emotions from how beautifully this was written!
I wonder how it hasn’t gotten more attention that it 100 percent deserves!
Overall this was a great read and I hope to read more of your writing soon! Especially fanfictions!
Have an amazing rest of your day/night!
Crim signing out!