Published May 30, 2010
Dear Lord
Let today be like no other day
like a light has been turned on
and shown the way to our true selves
like the first snow of winter
let today cover yesterdays mistakes
and create a path for tomorrow
Let today be like the sea
a home for many
let it wash away the beaches of hopelessness
and provide the foundation for hope to be built upon
Please Lord let there be peace today
a calm hush that covers and protects
Thank you Lord, for today.
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140,691 Literary Works • 673,622 Reviews
Hello Creative!
I just reviewed your third Dear Lord poem
I really enjoyed this.
Again as I said for your third Dear Lord poem this would benefit from some punctuation as it would again make it feel more like spoken word. And the reader needs a point where they can breathe! Try reading it aloud and you will find where the natural pauses fall. You don't always have to use periods or commas either, you can use dashes/hyphens to show hesitation when someone is speaking to someone or perhaps confessing something.
I loved the message behind it and of course the imagery, though it was a little overwhelming at times. You can tone it down a little. Sometimes the simpler images are the ones that are most effective.
Overall though, a beautiful prayer and a lovely poem! I am going to go now and read your Dear Lord 2
Well Done!
Keep Writing,
~Lydia
I love this! Its a beautiful prayer, and poem in general. If you write many of these you could try putting together a devotional/prayer book and maybe even publishing it. I know I enjoyed reading it! =) Let me know if you post any more.
Lovely poem. Not exactly ground breaking but lovely.
The imagery is a little overwhelming
You really need to add some punctuation becuase
if this poem was read aloud, the reader wouldn't stop.
Believe me, it's harder than it sounds. Grammar is the key.
Love the imagery, you just need to tone it down a bit.
Lovely prayer overall.
KEEP WRITING
-Pages <33
Really beautiful! Some parts are just a bit confusing the first time you read them, but overall a wonderful prayer!
Well I like it. I think it might benefit from a little more punctuation but that's just me. The imagery and such are a little overworked, but are also well-done so I'm sort of conflicted right now. I don't think you opened up or found anything new, and it's nothing that I really haven't seen before, but it's nice.
Keep writing.
~StoryWeaver