Darkness

I’ve all ways wanted to know what it feels like to die. Do you see a bright light? Do you see your body lieing where it’s suppose to be? Do you feel anything? Do you feel everything?

I thought about trying it once, before this. I thought that knowing was better then wondering. I couldn’t decide how to do it, so I changed my mind.

Now that I am dead, wondering is better than knowing. There is no bright lights, no body, no nothing! It was blackness. It is blackness.

The pain doesn’t go away. I’m not any less sad about losing everything. I still feel broken, and lonely.

What happened to the pearly white gates? What about the enormous kingdom that was made for me? What about the mighty creator? What about the angels?

There is no handsome angels flying high above. There is no harp or any other instrument. There is no long white robes. No angels.

I’ve seen more angels on earth. I’ve been where it seemed more like heaven than this. I’ve seen pearly white gates. I’ve heard angels sing. This is not Heaven.

This is hell.