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Canary word: Present
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
... whoa. Awesome. It sounds like a song ( don't kill me for this)... i kept hearing a rapper read it as I did.
Purely awesome... I love how you mentioned cotton-burns and all of those other incredible images. EXTREME KUDOS!!!!
And a chocolate-chip cookie for you too.
I know how much you just love my critiques on poetry, so I won't say much.
It was long... very long... but the strange way it was held together kept the poem from completely falling apart. Which is a good thing. I'm sure you intended it to be that way though...
And then there was the part where you deliberately used bad grammar, which made me want to strangle the author of the poem... *grins evilly*
But that's to be expected from an essayist like me, eh? ;P
Anyway, this was my favorite part of it:
"I'm clever, but I'm not clever. I'm sorry. For instance.
Last night your best friend taught me a diminished
chord progression in the keys of be and see
and other things. Oh shush. All along I’d meant to"
I thought that was clever. ^_^ Really clever. As a musician, I applaud you! If you look at it literally, it is intriguing, and if you look at it not-so-literally, it also is intriguing. Brownie points to you!
Now that I can speak again...that is, type again...well, you know what I mean. What I mean is, I'd tell you how fantastic you are, but since you wouldnt care, I wont. But yeah.
Fantastic.