I think the piece had a lot of potential, but the rhyming wasn't necessary. It felt forced a lot of the time, and it felt like you were stopping and starting, instead of making it flow smoothly from one line to the next. Aside from that, powerful, and emotional.

I liked it. It was very intense and had a lot of regret and emotion in it. Usually rhyming is over done or not good with the poems, but with yours it seemed to work really well. I liked the topic and the way you portrayed the imagery. Very dark and creepy. But over all it was good.
-Hayley

This was a good poem. Be careful to avoid singular conjugation of verbs involving more than one thing, though. Other than that, I found nothing too in need of correction. I'm not sure I liked the rhyming of the poem, but I loved the idea behind it. It really was an amazing piece, so don't let my ideas mitigate the beauty of your work. Great job, and keep it up! I look forward to reading more of your pieces!