Fall Through

by bookworm427

  • Poetry

Published April 25, 2012

In poetry

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When the wind stops blowing
and children cease their laughter,
When "Once upon a time" begins
with no "happily ever after."

When my world one day turns upside down
and inside out and backwards,
When a library's out of books
and when books run out of words.

When my body is down under ground
and I have paid my dues,
I'll finally give up my dreams
and hopes of them coming true.

In the meantime I'll struggle
and hope the floor won't fall through,
I'll somehow make it anyway
while I pretend to have a clue.

And in some way, and then somehow
I'll manipulate the game,
Bend it to my simple rules
until it's put to shame.

Eventually I will succeed,
More or less in my own way,
It's my goal, it's my promise
Before the end of my day.
Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
bagelbaby
Review
bagelbaby wrote a review Review · Apr 26, 2012

'When "Once upon a time" begins with no "happily ever after."
That was my favorite part of the whole thing. This poem is really well-written though, in my opinion. When you say that about your "simple rules," it leads the reader on, makes then wonder.. I like that in a poem. It really seems like you put alot of thought into this, so for that I have to thank you. :)

User avatar
Twitch Review
Twitch wrote a review Review · Apr 25, 2012

I think this is a wonderful poem. I don't really know how to write a review, but I'll give it a go. I think the first to stanzas are my favorite. I find them rather clever. I'd say it's a solid piece. I am kind of curious though, what are your "simple rules?" Why are they simple? The rhyme scheme is nice and I appreciate your slight use of alliteration. :)



i like that the title of dr jekyll and mr hyde makes a clear stance that the embodiment of one’s own evil doesn’t get a claim to the doctorate
— waywardxwallflower