Road Signs
I tread on a path
where the dust kicks off the ground
and hangs in the air, floating.
I walk along winding turns,
criss-crossing like snake scales
whose luster fade into a gray unknown.
Sometimes exhilarant from the beauty of this natural world:
the kiss of drizzling rain lifting the weight on my shoulders
until they come up lightly when I shrug.
Other times, beaten down on by a glaring sun:
eyes scabbed with burns from the clinging dust,
skin raw from the whip of the wind.
But always, always, I remember
that this journey has no road signs,
that I have no clue where it ends.
Sometimes that knowledge is freedom.
Other times, it is despair.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,013 Literary Works • 672,844 Reviews
wow. the anonymity and the generic attitude you submitted this with alone makes me want to give this a five-star. Reading your lines, i don't see a 'what-age'-guy (or gal, see how hard u've made this?), or the writer's world. all i CAN see is the poem, the path i imagine to be brown and unmetalled, and an obscuring fog of dust. i see decisions gone wrong, and decisions that were right, and i see a maze of life, a graph of crests and peaks. i see endless wanderings and going wherever the day leads, going through the 'drizzling rain, glaring suns, clinging dust, and whistling winds.'
"that I have no clue where it ends.
Sometimes that knowledge is freedom.
Other times, it is despair."
this reminds me of 'the truth is rarely pure, and never simple.' in short, im saying these lines made me feel, something that only my sister's poems can do. though for me she'll always be the best (no offence), this work is beautiful.
Thank you for the thoughtful feedback! I appreciate it a lot
Hey biochroma!
Let me start off by saying that I love the message of this piece. The way that you described everything, from the beautiful rain to the wind made this poem so interesting to read. I loved all of the metaphors which really added to the feel. My only suggestion would be to divide the top stanza into multiple, just to give the reader a little bit of a break. Overall great work, I look forward to reading more in the future!
-1nspire
Thank you so much! The kind words mean a lot
You're welcome!