Published August 6, 2026
Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for violence.
CHAPTER 1
The dream always begins the same.
The wind whips through the towering pines, their branches groaning and bending like ancient bones. Moonlight slants in silver streaks across the forest floor, painting the world in a kaleidoscope of shadow and light. The air is sharp, filled with the scent of pine, snowmelt, and something older and wild.
Running.
Paws strike the ground in perfect rhythm. The earth feels alive, every root and stone pulsing with the heartbeat of the mountain. Lungs drawing in the cold air greedily. Thick, moon-pale fur, ripples with every bound. I don’t question my form—it feels right. Natural.
Trees give way to a clearing. Nestled between massive boulders is a house. It’s always here.
Small, crooked, and leaning to one side, the house looks as if it grew from the earth itself, cobbled together from mossy stones and gnarled wood, smoothed by centuries. Vines crawl across the roof. A single window glows with warm amber light.
Kya pads to the door. It creaks open without a touch.
Inside, the space unfolds. What looked like a cramped house, stretches into a vast estate of impossible halls and echoing chambers, filled with old paintings that shift from the corner of her eye, staircases that twist upward only to return her to where they began. The air is scented with lavender and dust. Somewhere, a clock ticks, but she can never find it.
She searches. Always searches.
Through velvet-curtained archways, across cold marble floors, past mirrors that reflect not her wild beastly form, but a human face, wide-eyed and alone.
Then, the garden.
She finds it every time. An open courtyard bathed in moonlight, the hedges neatly trimmed but brimming with white flowers that glow in the night’s reflection. The air is still. The sky impossibly vast above her, strewn with stars like scattered gems, and in the center of it all: the moon. Huge, white and watching.
A blinding light bursts from its surface, flooding the garden, swallowing everything in brilliance. The voice that follows is booming, ageless, and unmistakably feminine.
“Kya…”
She strains to listen, heart pounding. Her paws dig into the soft earth, ears flattened under the weight of something ancient awakening inside her. The voice begins to say more, words forming on the edge of understanding—
And she wakes.
I wake gasping and clutch the warm fur pressing against my side. The great black head, yellow eyes gleaming in the half-light. A low chuff escapes him, concerned but calm.
Kya? Clarra, stirs at her feet, her reddish coat dusted with early morning frost. The dream again?
Kya nods, sitting up in the bed of moss and pine boughs she'd made in the hidden hollow where they lived. Her breath curls in the cool morning air. Around her, the forest is waking—birdsong tentative in the trees, the distant rush of a waterfall somewhere beyond the ridge.
“It was the same,” she murmurs. “The house. The garden. The moon. She tried to speak. I could almost hear her this time.”
Kato’s golden eyes held hers for a long moment before sliding his gaze to Clarra, still resting on the moss. It was subtle, but Kya saw it. Something passed between them, silent and knowing.
She frowned. “What is it?”
Neither answered.
She waited, lips parting to ask again, but Clarra rose with a shake of her red coat and stretched, long and slow. Kato blinked and turned toward the trees. Whatever they knew, they weren’t budging.
Kya sighed and brushed a hand through her silver hair, tousled from sleep. The dream had left her disoriented, her heart still drumming. But dreams were silly things, she reminded herself. Wisps and riddles. Nothing more.
Still, a prickle lingered along her skin like the brush of unseen eyes.
She shook it off and stood, padding barefoot to the stream that curved like a ribbon of glass through the hollow. Morning mist clung low to the earth as she knelt by the water, cupping it in her hands and splashing her face. The chill bit through sleep’s residue, clearing her thoughts. She caught sight of her violet eyes in the gleaming ripples. Her sharp cheekbones and slightly crooked nose shifted with the current. Her skin, sun-warmed and freckled, bore the soft smudges of dirt and ash. She belonged more to the mountains than to anything else.
Behind her reflection, Kato’s dark shape emerged.
Ready to hunt?
A slow smile curved her lips. “Always.”
The forest sang as they moved through it.
Branches whispered against one another in the wind, birds cried out overhead, and the thump of hooves or flutter of wings startled from the underbrush as the trio ran. Kya’s feet were silent on the pine-covered ground. She moved with the ease of one who had lived her entire life as part of the wild. Her breath matched the rhythm of the wolves’ strides, and she weaved effortlessly through trees, ducking under branches, leaping stones, and laughing when the wind pushed tears into her eyes.
Clarra ran just ahead, her red coat streaking between ferns and brambles like a flame. Kato was to her right, almost silent despite his size. Together, they were a shadow—silent, swift, and deadly.
They hunted like this once a week, Kya could forage and trap easily enough, but the hunt… the hunt was different. It fed something deeper. A ritual of motion and unity, wordless and sacred.
Clarra paused, nose to the wind. Deer, she murmured. Two. Close.
Kya crouched behind a fallen log, her eyes narrowing. “Wind’s in our favor?”
Yes, Kato replied. We’ll push them east. You circle wide. The glade near the stone ridge.
She nodded once, already slipping through the trees. Her movements quiet, precise. Years of practice had taught her how to step without snapping twigs, how to move with the breeze. Her carved spear—yew wood, smoothed by time and wrapped in leather at the grip—was slung across her back.
She reached the ridge just as the wolves made their move.
A blur of motion. Snarls split the morning hush as Kato and Clarra burst from the underbrush, their massive forms driving the startled deer into a panic. Hooves churned earth and leaf, but the wolves were faster—guiding, herding, relentless.
The smaller doe veered east, exactly as planned, her hooves striking stone as she fled.
Kya waited, muscles coiled.
The deer crested the rise—Kato leapt. His massive body slammed into the doe’s side, knocking it to the ground. Clarra was already there, her teeth at its flank, holding it down.
Kya sprinted the last few feet, her spear in hand. Her breath burning in her chest, but her grip was steady. She met the deer’s wide, panicked eyes and whispered, “Moon guide your spirit home.” and drove the point cleanly into its heart.
It was done.
Silence returned slowly, broken only by their breathing.
Kya knelt beside the fallen creature, resting a hand on its still-warm shoulder. “Thank you,” she murmured. The wolves stood nearby, watching with solemn patience. Ritual mattered to them, too.
They would share the meat, leave some for the scavengers, and bury the bones beneath a cairn of stones, like always.
But as Kya rose and wiped the blood from her spear tip, something in the wind shifted. A scent, unfamiliar and faint.
Clarra lifted her head. Do you smell that?
Kato’s ears flicked and his body tensed. Smoke.
Kya turned slowly toward the horizon, heart tightening.
Smoke curled through the trees like a serpent—thin, gray, almost playful as it twisted through the shafts of morning light.
Kato stilled beside her, muscles rigid beneath his thick black coat. Clarra crept forward, her nose low to the ground. The wind had shifted, and now, with the scent of smoke, came others—scents Kya did not know.
Iron. Horses. Humans.
Kya rose slowly, spear still in hand. “Humans?” she asked aloud, uncertain, her voice quieter than the wind in the trees.
Kato said nothing and Clarra’s ears were flattened. Too many, she said finally. Ten, maybe more. Not from these mountains.
Kya’s heartbeat quickened. She hadn’t seen another human in… she didn’t know if she had seen another, truly. Her memories before the wolves were shadows and feelings. Hunger, cold, crying in the dark. Then, warmth. Fur. Fire. Kato and Clarra had raised her, fed her, protected her. Taught her to survive. Taught her to thrive.
And kept her far away from anything and anyone else.
“Why are they here?” she murmured, her gaze fixed on the faint smoke ribbon.
They shouldn't be, Kato growled, low and deep. No one comes this far. Not without reason or without cost.
Kya blinked at him. “What do you mean?”
Kato didn’t answer. Instead, he looked at Clarra again. Another silent exchange passed between them.
Kya frowned. “You two keep doing that. Looking at each other like I’m not here. Like I don’t deserve to know.”
Clarra turned, eyes soft but firm. It’s… not time.
“Time for what? What are you keeping from me?”
Silence.
Kya turned away, frustration knotting in her chest. She stared out into the trees, past the veil of ferns and moss-draped trunks, past the ancient stones and frost-laced ridges.
For years, she had roamed freely through these mountains. Miles and miles of wilderness. She had walked for days in one direction only to find herself circling back, as if the land itself were gently herding her home. It had never struck her as strange.
Not until the dreams.
And now, this smoke.
The scent tugged at something inside her, something she couldn't name. A starved curiosity.
She stepped forward, securing the spear to her back again. Her breath came slowly. She could hear them now—murmurs. Laughter. Voices. Real, human voices, just beyond the ridge.
Kato stepped into her path. His eyes met hers with golden ferocity, and filled with a fear he would not speak aloud.
Kya, he said quietly in her mind, do not go closer.
She blinked. “Why not?”
Because the edge is breaking.
Clarra came to her side. The wards… barriers. They kept you safe. Hidden. But something is changing. We shouldn’t be able to hear them.
Kya stared at them, stunned. “Wards? What do you mean?”
Kato’s gaze didn’t waver. This land is protected. It has been since we came here. I built the boundaries to keep you from wandering too close to the outside. To keep the outside from finding you.
Kya took a step back, heart pounding. “You… you built them?”
Clarra nodded. Not just him. The mountain itself. The magic here is old. Wild. It listens to those who know its name. But even it cannot hold forever. Something is pressing in.
Kya swallowed hard. She looked again toward the source of the smoke, and this time the scent pulled at her like a thread tied to her ribs.
“I’ve walked these mountains my whole life,” she said. “I’ve never found a barrier. Never saw anything that told me I couldn’t go somewhere.”
Clarra looked away. That was the point.
Kato lowered his head. Until now, the wards guided your steps without your knowing. You would feel tired before reaching the edge. Or forget what direction you were walking.
“I thought I was just… wandering.”
You were meant to, Clarra said gently.
Kya shook her head. The stream gurgled nearby, its sound suddenly too loud in the silence between them.
“But the dream,” she said quietly, “the moon… it was calling to me. It feels like something is waking up. Like… I’m waking up.”
Neither wolf answered.
She looked to the trees again.
“I have to see them.”
No, Kato said, his voice sharp. They bring danger.
“Then I’ll be careful.”
You are not ready!
Her fingers curled into fists. “Maybe I’ve been ready for a long time, and you’re just afraid of what I’ll find.”
That stopped them both.
Kya turned, not waiting for their reply, and moved through the trees—swift, quiet, but not hiding.
The smoke grew stronger. So did the voices. Soon, she reached a small rise above a clearing and there, spread out in the valley below, was a camp.
Tents made of canvas and hide. Horses tethered along the edge of a brook. A fire crackling in the center, with meat roasting and pots simmering. Men and women moved about, armed and armored, dressed in dark leather and long cloaks. Some were laughing. Others sharpening blades.
Kya crouched low among the ferns, her body still as stone. She covered her mouth and nose with her shall to hide her breath.
Tents rustled in the breeze. Horses stomped and snorted, their breath fogging in the cool air. Kya counted at least a dozen people, not including those hidden inside the tents or walking the camp’s perimeter.
Two younger men, both looking near her age, stepped into the open space near the fire and began to spar. Their wooden practice swords cracked together with rhythmic snaps, laughter spilling from their lips as they circled one another in exaggerated stances. One feinted a blow and was promptly tripped, landing on his back with a theatrical groan.
Kya tilted her head, watching them—fascinated. She’d never seen play like this. Their energy was bright. Chaotic. But it wasn’t unkind. They smiled easily. They touched each other’s shoulders like brothers. For a moment, she forgot she was hiding, a small smile touching the corners of her mouth.
Then her gaze was drawn to him.
At the center of it all, a man with dark hair, silver in his beard and a long, curved sword at his side turned slowly. His gaze lifted toward the trees, toward her.
As if he sensed something. As if he were waiting.
He stood apart from the others, a tall figure draped in black wool and hardened leather. His blade’s hilt worn with use. His face was hard, weathered by wind and time, but his eyes… his eyes were fixed. On her.
No.
On the place she was hiding.
Kya didn’t move. Didn’t breathe.
She was downwind. She knew how to vanish, to blend into bark and shadow. But still, his gaze did not waver. Not for an instant.
He began to walk toward the ridge, boots crunching against the pine needles.
Someone called after him. “Andros! We need you to—”
He lifted a hand in silent dismissal, never breaking stride.
The name echoed in her mind. Andros.
There was something about him that unsettled her. Not fear exactly. But not safety either. His presence felt... aware. Vigilant. Like a hawk circling high above the trees, seeing everything.
The weight of Kya’s spear suddenly felt heavy on her back. Her heart stuttered once.
This had seemed like a good idea when she first smelled the smoke, when curiosity was a warm tug behind her ribs. But now?
Now he was too close.
He reached the edge of the rise—just a few feet below her. She could hear his breath. Could almost see the flicker of his eyes scanning the underbrush. She shifted slightly, preparing to move—
“Wolf!”
The shout rang through the clearing like a struck bell.
Andros turned sharply, cloak flaring behind him.
Kya’s breath caught as her gaze snapped to the camp. One of the sparring men pointed toward the woods behind them, eyes wide. “There—beyond the Ash grove!”
The camp erupted into chaos.
Men leapt to their feet, hands flying to swords and bows. Women barked orders, some diving for armor, others whistling to the horses. Kya’s gaze followed as Andros whirled catching a glimpse of movement. Dark fur, bounding like a shadow between the trees.
Kato.
A blur, gone in seconds.
“After it!” Andros roared, voice cutting through the tumult like a blade. “Move! Fan out!”
Boots pounded the forest floor. Weapons flashed. The hunters disappeared into the trees like hounds let loose from a leash.
Kya’s heart raced. She turned to move—
A sharp nip at her heel.
Clarra.
The red wolf’s fangs gently tugged at her ankle, just enough to pull her back. Her pale rose eyes met Kya’s, bright with urgency.
Come. Hurry. We must away while they’re distracted.
Kya didn’t argue.
She turned and followed Clarra through the underbrush, the forest rushing past them in streaks of green and gold. The sound of the hunters faded behind her, swallowed by distance and birdsong. Her breath returned in bursts, her limbs remembering the rhythm of flight. Clarra led the way, weaving through deer paths and rocky clefts with the precision of a spirit born of the land.
By the time they reached the hollow the world had gone still again.
The sun had risen higher, casting longer rays of light through the canopy and burning off the last of the morning mist. Kya collapsed beside the water; arms braced on her knees. Clarra sat a few feet away, ears twitching, listening for any sign of pursuit.
A few minutes later, Kato emerged from the shadows, silent as ever. His chest heaved with exertion, but there was no blood on his fur. Smoke lingered on his scent.
They won’t follow far, he said. The magic still confuses them near the heart. For now. We’ll have to go further into the mountains tomorrow.
Kya stared at them both, sweat cooling on her brow, hands still trembling.
“You let me see them,” she whispered.
Clarra’s head turned, eyes narrowing. We warned you not to go.
“But you knew they were there. You let me get that close. You could’ve stopped me. Why didn’t you?”
The wolves didn’t answer immediately.
Then Clarra said softly, Because something is calling you, and we cannot silence it forever.
Kya looked toward the trees again, her thoughts spinning. Toward the man—Andros—who had stared directly at her without seeing her. Who had drawn closer than anyone ever had. Who felt like the edge of a story she didn’t know she’d been telling.
“What’s beyond the barrier?” she asked. “Why are they here now, after all this time?”
Kato’s answer came slow and heavy.
What sleeps within the mountains is starting to wake and it’s not only you who hears the call.
“And what sleeps within the mountains?”
Magic.
Kya sat on the mossy ledge above the stream, knees drawn to her chest, eyes fixed on the shifting light in the canopy. Her mind was still tangled from the way her world had shifted.
She had questions. Too many. And for once, she wasn’t going to let them go unanswered.
Kato stood nearby, his black form statuesque and still, staring toward the distant edge of the hollow. Clarra paced the streambank, her ears flicking back as if she could still hear the barked orders of the hunting party.
Kya’s voice broke the silence.
“Why are we really here?”
Neither wolf spoke.
“You didn’t just find me in the woods and take me in out of kindness. You didn’t just raise me.”
Still nothing.
She stood, her jaw tight. “I’ve followed your rules. Stayed within the bounds you never told me existed. Trusted your silences. But not anymore! I saw the way he—Andros—looked. Like he knew who he was hunting. When I ask who I am, you say ‘not yet.’ When I ask where I came from, you change the subject.”
Clarra stopped pacing.
“I need the truth,” Kya said, softer now. “No more barriers. No more waiting. Tell me what I am!”
Heaviness fell between them. The heaving of Kya’s breaths the only sound.
Then Kato finally turned, his great head dipping once like a bow. He padded toward the edge of the hollow where the ferns grew thick, and without a word, vanished behind the dense brush.
Clarra followed, her red tail the last thing Kya saw before they both disappeared.
Kya furrowed her brow. “What are you doing? You can’t just run away from this!”
Silence. Then—the shuffle of movement. A low grunt. The rustle of fabric.
Voices. Human voices.
“You might want to sit,” said a familiar voice—Kato’s voice, but deeper, resonant in a way it had never been in her mind. A moment later, the ferns parted.
A tall man stepped through.
His pale skin marked with old scars, and his frame powerful, broad-shouldered, wrapped in a shirt of worn wool and hide. His jet black hair was pulled back into a thick knot, and his familiar golden eyes held hers with quiet gravity.
Kya’s breath caught.
Clarra stepped out beside him, slighter in frame but no less striking. Her hair was long and auburn with streaks of white at the temples. Her eyes were rose-tinged, a lighter version to Kya’s violet. She wore a simple tunic and trousers, both loose and weather-worn. Her feet were bare.
Kya backed up a step. “No.”
“Yes,” Clarra said softly. “This is what we are.”
“You’re… you’re human!?” she whispered, throat tight.
Kato—the man—shook his head. “We’re not just human, Kya. We are shifters. Werewolves, if you must use the old word.”
Kya’s mind reeled. Her knees nearly gave, but she forced herself to stay standing. “Can you transform into other things?”
“No. Just wolves.”
“You can… you can turn at will?” Kya’s voice quivered as she spoke.
“At will,” Clarra confirmed. “The strongest of us usually can.”
“We’ve kept the truth from you,” Kato continued, stepping forward slowly, “not to hurt you. Not to lie. But to protect you. You were born here. You wouldn’t have understood.”
“I wouldn’t have understood?” Kya hissed, voice rising. “All my life, I thought I was alone. I thought maybe something was wrong with me. That I was… abandoned.”
“You were not abandoned,” Clarra said quickly, her eyes shining. “You were hidden.”
Kya’s mouth opened, then closed. “Why?”
Kato exhaled. “Because others were hunting you.”
The words struck like cold water.
“What?”
“You were born to these mountains,” Clarra said. “Kato and I risked everything to escape with you. You were already marked before you born, at least in the eyes of wolves who hunted you.”
“The wolves?”
“The spirits of this place,” Clarra said. “The old magic. They whispered your name before you could speak it. They chose you. Protected you. That’s why we built the barriers—to keep others out. Those who would come looking for you.”
Kya’s knees finally gave, and she sank onto a rock near the stream. “I don’t understand. Why would anyone be hunting me? I’m just… me.”
Kato knelt across from her. “You’re not just anything, Kya.”
“There’s power in you,” Clarra said gently.
Kya stared down at her hands, her fingers trembling ever so slightly. The memory of the dream clung to her. The rush of the wind through fur, the earth pounding beneath paws, the moon speaking her name in a voice that stirred something inside her.
“You’ve felt it,” Clarra said, “Haven’t you? The change. The dreams.”
Kya nodded, slow and uncertain.
“It’s not just magic stirring in you,” Kato said, his voice low and grave. “It’s your very blood. The legacy of your heritage.”
“My heritage?” Kya’s eyes burned but she let no tears fall.
Clarra moved forward, kneeling in front of Kya. “You’re one of us. A shifter. A wolf. But… not like the others.”
Kya blinked, stunned. “How could I be—I…I’ve never—”
Clarra gently reached out, fingers brushing the collar of Kya’s tunic, sliding it down over her left shoulder. Kya didn’t resist.
A mark was there.
She had never thought much of it before. A faint shape, a crescent, small and luminous like silver dew. It shimmered in the filtered sun, catching the smallest reflection of light.
Kya stared at it. “What is it?”
Kato stepped forward. “A mark spoken of in the old stories. A prophecy older than most remember. A child born under the veiled moon. A crescent on her skin. The moon lighting her blood, even in darkness.”
Clarra’s eyes shone, and her voice shook now, thick with something deep. “You were born with that mark, Kya. My daughter. Born in secret, in pain, and in hope.”
Kya froze. “What?”
Clarra reached for her hand. “You are my child.”
Kya pulled back slightly, her breath shallow. “But… you never said. You never told me.”
“I couldn’t,” Clarra whispered. “Not then. You were safer not knowing. If you knew, and were somehow captured… linking you to me, and to your father, would have put you in more danger.”
Kya stumbled back a step, shaking her head. “My mother? And you let me believe—you let me think—”
“I stayed close,” Clarra said hurriedly, trying to calm her. “I watched every new step. I dried your tears when you cried. I hunted so you could eat. But if they knew I had a child—if they knew you survived—they never would have given up until they had you.”
“They?” Kya’s voice was cold now. “Who is they?”
Kato answered. “The Deadclaw Pack.”
Clarra’s gaze hardened at the name. “Their Alpha, Sylas, is a tyrant. Ruthless. He believes power need not be earned, simply taken. He saw our bloodline—your blood—as a tool. A weapon. He wanted a child only for what they could become.”
Kya’s mind reeled. The world felt too still around her, too quiet, like the forest was holding its breath with her.
“He killed your father, Kiel,” Clarra continued, her voice a rasp. “The man I had chosen, who had also chosen me...” the pain the memory surfaced was clear in her voice as she continued. “He challenged him. Claimed me like a prize. The beast took me on the dual grounds, right in front of...” Her throat caught at the memory, and she closed her eyes for a moment.
“I fought him, but he was older, stronger, filled with bloodlust. I thought I could survive, endure, keep myself alive until I found a way to break free. Then I discovered your father had left me a parting gift. You.”
A long silence passed.
“I couldn’t let him have you,” Clarra said. “So, Kato and I planned in secret for months. He’s your father’s brother. He left everything to help us escape.” She met Kato’s gaze for a moment before continuing. “We made it into the mountains, and I went into labor before we could get farther.”
“You were born at the heart,” Kato added. “and the magic rooted in this place recognized you. It wrapped itself around you. Strengthened the wards. Shielded you. The mountains claimed you.”
Kya’s legs buckled, and she sank to the mossy ground again. The coolness of the earth pressed through her skin.
She looked up at Clarra, voice small. “And all this time… I thought I was just some foundling you took pity on.”
Clarra knelt beside her, wrapping her arms around her daughter.
“You were never just anything to us,” she whispered into Kya’s hair. “You were everything.”
Kya let herself lean into her mother for a breath and for a moment she never knew she was missing. But the fire in her hadn’t dimmed. If anything, it burned hotter now.
She pulled back, her face solemn. “And this Andros… he’s here looking for me?”
Kato nodded. “He’s a hound of Deadclaw. Their best tracker. He may not even know what he’s hunting, only who. And if he’s here, Sylas is behind it.”
Kya’s hands curled into fists.
“If they want me,” she said, her violet eyes glowing faintly now, “they can come and try to take me.”
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Good morning!
I saw you doing reviews and now you have a story in the Green Room! It was meant to be XD
I’m ready to be swept away by a good romance (it has happened before!)
I love how you describe the cabin in the woods (also the nod that we are probably dealing with a shifter thing—even if the MC is not a shifter [yet])
And I love this detail:
Not so fond of the next line tho. Idk is she searching for the clock? That makes the clock sentences less special somehow. Is she searching for something else? Then you’re being too vague :/
I do like that the mirrors show her as a human, no matter what form she’s currently taken!
Hmmm intrigued by the normal situation she wakes up too. I do love me some telepathic friends~ Also I like how she describes dreams as riddles!
Oha with her violet eyes and white hair, I figured she’d be some sort of albino—and so the freckles caught me completely off guard =D
I like how wolves and human work together in the hunt and how clearly you walk us through their process. I wasn’t lost or wondering for information once :3
Tho you are losing me a bit with this phrasing: Because either she’d seen a human and remembers or she doesn’t but if she doesn’t… why does she know this is humans then? oô
Ohhh what an interesting concept. And the wolves clearly know something. That someone paid a steep price to leave Kya with them, huh?
You were so careful, earlier, with how you presented information and with what your characters were saying and how they were saying it. I feel the information that the wolves warded the place comes … without the same story telling grace. It feels very rushed and we also don’t rly get a reaction from Kya for how the wolves were even capable of this magic etc
Like they kept this big secret from her and now they just spring all this info on her… I just… hm I don’t like the pacing of this.
Well… I didn’t really get that feeling: As I said, I don’t feel like you’ve done enough groundwork for me to understand why she went there. I do like how she’s transfixed by these humans bc ofc she would. She’s never seen others like herself before. I also don’t mind that she’s too paralysed to move away when Andros approaches. I just don’t like how she describes this to herself, that this was a good idea. Because she never reflected on what going to the humans means to her. She just decides to go there. :/
Ohaaa what type of evil wolves are these humans regularly dealing with that an entire contingent of soldiers is whipped into a frenzy by their mere presence? A wolf in the woods? What a shocker!! Fork found in kitchen!
I have the bad feeling that Kato will die for this and that Kya will be sad but not properly sad over it =.=
Ah well I am glad it didn’t happen this time…
Also I like how the wolves are like “welp guess it is time” and didn’t try to stop her. That speaks for their character.
I AM very curious why Andros was able to sense her. Also this: I don’t know what you mean by this.
I think now is a much better time for Kya to ask these questions and receive answers.
Well then, I was right abt the shifters!
Uhhh that feels like a contradiction? Like no, they cannot transform at will UNLESS they are the strongest?
Okay I think you are drifting into “too much info”
Now we have the reveal: my parents are wolf shifters. I was hidden. Wolves were hunting me. I’m special etc and it all because too much. I have a hard time following and in so, I have a hard time relating to the characters ☹
I also don’t get why they couldn’t just raise Kya as a wolf then. If it truly doesn’t matter? Like why go through the whole “we hid her far away from civilization” but telling her she can transform is a step too far? I don’t see it. Or that her actual parents are with her? That seems needlessly complicated and I don’t buy the parents’ explanation.
Yes yes, Deadclaw etc BUT THEY DON’T KNOW WHERE YOU WERE, right? So why not tell your child who she is when she is hidden anyway. What.
Well I do like the start but that ending is… well it is certainly something. I’m still reeling from all this information ^^°
Hi Tikaya! Thanks for all the feedback! This is a first draft and definitely a work in progress. It is also the first time I have tried writing in third person. I really appreciate you taking the time to make so many detailed comments about the pacing and what didn't make sense to with the story. Also pointing out the emotional reactions. That is an area I have been working on with my other projects because I tend to forget about them and get lost in my descriptions haha. I will have to revisit this one on that too! Some of the questions you asked will be answered in subsequent chapters
"Ohaaa what type of evil wolves are these humans regularly dealing with that an entire contingent of soldiers is whipped into a frenzy by their mere presence? A wolf in the woods? What a shocker!! Fork found in kitchen!" hahah - yea this one is answered later.
"Uhhh that feels like a contradiction? Like no, they cannot transform at will UNLESS they are the strongest?" - yea I can definitely see how that would be kind of confusing. I should change that.
"Who felt like the edge of a story she didn’t know she’d been telling.
I don’t know what you mean by this." - It is meant to convey that she feels connected to something already happening in her life, even though she hasn't understood that connection yet. Perhaps I'll adjust it if it's not coming through properly.
"Because either she’d seen a human and remembers or she doesn’t but if she doesn’t… why does she know this is humans then? oô" - so she has vague feelings from when she was young of being held but they are not clear which is why she is unsure. I may not have explained that in the story though!
About the people who raised her not telling her - this is answered in later chapters also
You have given me a lot to work on and I really am thankful! I appreciate you reading and helping me improve my writing!
No problem at all :3 Have fun writing!
Also I think you slip into first person a couple of times in this chapter and I forgot to mark down when OTL
I really like it when people are excited by their own projects~
Hi! I'm Charlie, here to help review your work. first of all, great job! very interesting work! I like the size of your paragraphs. there's a good amount of short, medium, and long ones. it has great pacing too. all of the characters feel realistic. I also love the themes.
Thanks for reading and commenting. I'm glad you enjoyed it!