August 24, A.D. 79
A deafening boom roars through Pompeii's crowded marketplace. The ground shakes violently throwing the midday shoppers off balance and toppling stands of fish and meat. People start screaming and pointing toward Mount Vesuvius, a massive volcano that rises above the bustling city, located in what is now southern Italy.
Vesuvius had been silent for nearly 2,000 years, but it roared back to life, shooting ash and smoke some 20 miles into the air. Almost overnight, the city and most of it's residents vanished under a blanket of ash and lava.
Now, almost 2,000 years later, scientists agree that Vesuvius is overdue for another major eruption-but no one knows when it will happen. Three million people live in the volcano's shadow, in the modern-day city of Naples, Italy. Correctly predicting when the eruption will take place will make a difference between life and death.
The Sky Is Falling
Through excavations that started in 1748 and continue to this day, scientists have been able to recreate almost exactly what happened in Pompeii on that terrible day.
"The thick ash turned everything black," says Pompeii expert Andrew Wallace-Hadrill. "People couldn't see the sun. All the landmarks disappeared. They didn't have the foggiest idea which way they were going."
Some people ran for their lives, clutching their valuable coins and jewelry. Other people took shelter in their homes. But the debris kept falling. Piles grew as deep as nine feet in some places, blocking doorways and caving in roofs.
Around midnight, the first of four searing-hot clouds, or surges, of ash, pumice, rock, and toxic gas rushed down the mountainside. Traveling toward Pompeii at up to 180 miles an hour, it scorched everything in it's path. Around 7a.m., 18 hours after the eruption, the last fiery surge buried the city.
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This was really well written! Like the two above me, making it longer would transform this into a full-fledged essay. However, I'm so amazed what I learned in a few short paragraphs. You did really well on this.
I do have 2 small nit-picks though.
In the second paragraph, you have ..."the city and most of it's residents..." The "it's" should be "its". The rule of "it's" is this: try putting "it is" in place of "it's" in the sentence. If "it is" works, than "it's" works there. If "it is" makes no sense, then "its" is the correct word.
The second thing I could see improvements with is the last sentence of the third paragraph, which reads:
To me, this sentence is worded really awkwardly. If it were me, I would have it say something more like:
Correctly predicting when the eruption will happen could make the difference between life and death.
On the whole, this was great! It was interesting and had a good balance between types of elaboration. You must get great grades on essays in school!
-Cassie
I agree. Perhaps a little more info, or a little more detailed. But I liked the amount of dramatic description crammed into that little space, it does make it (the eruption) all seem a lot more terrible and powerful in the readers eyes than the first part. I liked it, although a little more detail would be nice. Perhaps you could mention that people still find bodies, the kind of poses they're in, what happened afterwards, stuff like that.
A bit short.
Try finding out more.
Check the library,encyclopedia,Computer,etc.
Otherwise,It's pretty good.