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redemption attack pact

by amelie

Warning: This work has been rated 16+.

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34 Reviews

Points: 199
Reviews: 34

Wed Oct 23, 2019 3:20 pm
MiniGem26 wrote a review...

Gem here climbing out of her Jewelrybox for yet another review.

This poem conveys strong anger not at anyone but the speaker. The speaker is mad at their self from how I've read it anyway. The poem is powerful, it, it isn't as lithe as most on the subject it addresses. This poem jumps unafraid into the heavy stuff, looking at the names of some of your other poems it seems that this is a trend for you. You are a very brave poet, I respect that.
I really didn't criticize much, which is really because I feel as is I don't need to? I really like your style though the effect of your ending threw me off just a hair I know that is your style in general just I wasn't prepared for it. What I mean is like to me is the end of your poem feels like the middle of one of my own all the angst all the emotions bam! They just are building until they hit you in the face at the end and usually after that mine give you some sort of cool down. I haven't reviewed in a while though so I don't know how this is coming off.. What I am saying is I like your poem. It is a lot different then those of mine and really that is why I like it so much.

Anyway. Keep writing and have a great day!

And with that gem climbed back into her jewelry box until her next review.

User avatar
19 Reviews

Points: 337
Reviews: 19

Wed Oct 23, 2019 3:10 pm
EmileeBrightman wrote a review...

Hello! I'm here to write a review on your beautiful poem.

I saw that this has been sitting in the Green Room with no reviews, so I decided to check it out. And, I love it! I've never seen a poem written in this format, and I love how nice it looks.
I loved how you moved the poem along continuously, and you put a lot of emotion into this piece. The way you used raw emotion to keep it going was awesome, and I'm a sucker for raw, emotional pieces of writing. I'm not much of a criticism reviewer, so sorry! But the thing is, I just loved the piece, and there's nothing that I would say you need to work on!

As I said above, I'm not really one for really giving out a lot of criticism, so sorry if you were looking for that! I'd just like to say once again that this was good, and I hope to read more of your works!! I know that they'll be just as good as this one was. When I read this, I could tell that you can go far, just don't give up on your dreams! Honestly, I don't really have anything other negative things to write, because this piece is done well. Keep up the great work, and don't ever stop believing in yourself!! And, Em out! :D

I love how we all band together to break things...
— Kelpies