Young Writers Society

Hey!! Forever here with a tiny review!!

Hm... School pain. Literally, a lot of problems in the school. I really like how you described the pain in quite a funny way. You could have put it in humorous genre, I think. Also, realistic too wouldn't be a bad suit. Now with the capitalization. I wonder why you didn't capitalize the 'i's. Is it just a hint that your brain is not working properly due to the stress of school? That could be an interpretation of it. I really like the repetition. It did a good job emphasizing the fact that students have to go to school everyday and face the same problems a thousand if not more in lifetime. And wow, that scene of entering the classes. i know the feeling! And bus catching is an all time problem. Overall, this was quite a great piece of work. School school school. The title was... We often speak about the school like that.

This was a good start with the rhyming but I really think that if you start it out that way then it should continue. You also need to put your lines in order so your poem doesn't read like a paragraph because without those separated lines your poem didn't flow very well. Also, Clicky got you on spelling, but try to refrain from using i, instead of I, and use a lot more punctuation throughout the whole thing. Then as soon as you clarify the just of your sentences and use stronger words to make your readers stay interested this could make a good poem.

Keep at it!
-Rieda

I like it alot. I think it really conveys that you obviously don't like repeatedly going to school. I like school though, hehe.

Just a few spelling errors:

* (last line) relize = realize
* trample = trampled ?
* do your home ... i assume you meant do your homework?

"Untill a bell, registered in my brain, as an angel's song." <--- somethings bothering me, about this sentence, just can't figure out what... lol

I REALLY LIKE YOUR POEM THOUGH, YOU DID A GOOD JOB!!