Published December 6, 2011
Hey guys, ya its been a while since I've been on. This is just to warm up so I can get back into the rythm of things. Tell me what you think. 
I'm stuck at an impasse.
Two sides
Faced to one.
I could choose one
and keep the other....
Or choose the other
and loose one....
My thoughts don't quite sound right.
How could I consider the friend
The one I go to talk to when I need help?
And how could I consider the one who
I always go back to?
Is that what I want?
I try to clear my head but
the answer hides,
lost in the havoc of a receding thought.
I stand still,
Caught at a fork in the road.
Should I go to one or to the other?
....Or should I create a new road
right down the middle?
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Canary word: Present
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141,710 Literary Works • 675,600 Reviews
Thanks guys ya...that was an accidental misspelling. My bad. I'll PM you guys when I have more time to explain the other things you pointed out. Thanks for the reviews. Adidos!
I love the whole poem in general but my favorite line was
I don't know why, maybe it's because thoughts don't usually sound right until they are reworded in your head but it's a very nice poem. Keep up the good work.
Hello Amanda! I'm Rose, and I'll be reviewing this piece today!
First off, I'd just like to say that I adore this piece. It's exactly the kind of thing that I like to read; it's a little bit jumbled, but intentionally so, and I'm still able to find out what you're getting at. Great work! That being said, I did find a few issues with it.
While I love the first line, I'm not really sure what the next two mean. I could very well just be missing something; my mind doesn't always grasp things the first time around. Still, it's how I feel.
Ellipses should be used sparingly in poetry. In my opinion, they're used far too much. Most of the time, a comma will suffice. If I were you, I would edit this in the following manner:
I think that looks much cleaner.
The above three lines are my favorite of the entire poem. They're absolutely beautiful. I love them!
Great ending! (I eliminated the dots, though. I feel like they distracted from the awesomeness of the rest of the poem.)
Awesome work! Always keep writing!
-Rose
This is beautifully worded and the indecision you as the narrator are facing is running off these stanzas like rain on a leaf...so effortless, it sounds simply like a train of thought flawlessly put to words. Very well done. However, there is oooone spelling mistake in the second stanza:
"Loose" should be "lose".
I wouldn't be surprised if this was just a mindless typo. It just needed to be pointed out.
Beautiful grasp on language, I envy your fluency. Keep writing, you're very good at it!