Young Writers Society

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Heyyo it's voiceofdragons here for a review!!

I love love poems about the night sky!! It's so sweet.

"Today I took a star straight from the night sky." I love the imagery that was somehow painted from such a short sentence here. I really can see someone stretching as far as they can and just plucking a star from the sky like one would a blackberry off of a bush.
"Felt the rough edges and cupped the light so only I could see." I think it's interesting to describe the star as rough and not mention anything about the temperature. Seems somehow intangible but even more enchanting. I also feel like cupping the star for only the one's person's eyes is a very child like thing to do. So now I see a small child marvelling a star. It's very cute!! Ah.

"I crumpled it in my hand some of the ends pushing into the soft flesh of my palm." The star can be crumpled? Very interesting image here!

"I kissed my star, then breathed in its sweet perfume of flame and honey, wet sand, and meteor showers--but I choked on the star dust." I like the possessive "my" here. The words you use to describe the scent of the star is very neat too! Each of those scents is very distinctive and I can practically smell them. I like the choked on star dust but. I have no idea why but I do.

FLOWERS OF SPACE
I LOVE IT??? and the description of the flower/star growing roots in their lungs ?? That's super cool! So the star dust is kinda like seeds? How neeeeat!!

"I should have known never to take what belongs only to the heavens" once the narrator called the star theirs I figured this bit would happen.

That last line is so ominous I love it.

I really enjoyed this!! The works of Qinni came to mind while reading this. If you haven't seen her works I really recommend looking her up!

Keep up the awesome work!!

HEELLO alliyah,
A poem about falling in love with the stars. Love is a common topic when it comes to poetry and can be interpreted differently among writers. This poem however, put something new into the love category. What if your in love with not a person, but the stars?
"Today I took a star." You make it sound so casual, like you do stuff like this everyday. I like it. When you can do something impossible so easily.
"their roots beginning to grow around my earthling heart and squeezing a different pulse." Different indeed. I like how you described your heart as earthling. Separating human from heaven, two completely different worlds.
"I should have known never to take what belongs only to the heavens." This reminded me of one of those myths between mortals and gods. If the mortal does something to insult a god or goddess, they end up getting severely punished. Don't mess with the heavens, they are there for a reason.
"They tend to never let go." Again, you make it sound so casual. It's like a little breath from the serious tone of the poem. It keeps the poem flowing and makes it less tiring for the reader to read.

Keep casual,

Night Kaizer

Hey!!! It's Lily here...
It's a Beautiful Poem..like really beautiful!!!!
The way you described the star in your hand....was awesome!!
and...."Once you've inhaled the stars
they tend to never let go."

That was the best part of everything.#IncrediblyAwesome!!!!!^_^

Hey there, Katrina Kimberly here!

This is a beautiful poem. First off, I love how you describe yourself taking the star, when you talk about the light that only you can see. Then, when you go on to breathing in the star, it seems that the star almost becomes part of you. I enjoy how you talk about the smell of the star, how it smells of "flame and honey, wet sand, and meteor showers". I thought it was such an interesting and beautiful thing to think of how a star might smell. When you breathe in the star, there is such a large display of details and emotion that runs through the reader. I love your poem sooo much, and I know that every time I think of stars, I'll think of this poem <3

That's all for now! Best wishes,
Kitty Kimberly

Nice poem!

I don't have anything else to say about it. Good job. It was so great you silenced me!