Published February 1, 2010
how could i let this fall into spring
you were my summer fling
in the middle of winter
i looked to the west
and found that was where my compass pointed
and tried my best to act belated
some time ago i said this will never do
but this is something i can believe in
if only this was what you wanted to hear
i could never be your hero when you aren't here
i am who you thought i was
not who i am to you now
i took the biggest bow
this was my biggest show
you were my only fan and i never played you a song
if only you were going to hear what you wanted from me
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139,496 Literary Works • 672,585 Reviews
Hello, I am AspiringAuthorA..M. and will be your reviewer for tonight.
But, first, I have one quick question. Are lyrics supposed to be in all lower case letters? If not, then I suggest you capitalize the I's
Such a great line.
But, I'm sorry to say your ending line confused me. I had to read it multiple times and I still didn't understand it. Not a good thing. Some rewording would work wonders for the over all feel of your piece.
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a lot of my songs don't have a chorus because they're usually about two minutes long. i'm only posting my solo acoustic work, mind you
I quite liked the general idea of the song and, although its length worried me at first, on re-reading the lyrics I actually think the sparseness of your descriptions works quite well. However, if this is meant to be a song I can't help feeling it needs a chorus or at least some line to return to (unless you planned it that way and were going to have a repeated musical riff or whatever in it instead?); but besides that slight concern about a chorus I did think it was an enjoyable piece so well done
Great! Its awesome. You should post more!
You've hooked me into it!
Sonnyxx1
Its great!
awesome! Post more.
Kayla