E - Everyone

The Angel Lies

Clouds of iron grey huddled together in the sky over a small town. It was empty except for the occasional shopper who cast a glance at the sky dark, flinty sky. A small boy sat on the sidewalk, which was nearly as dirty as he, looking around in silence.

Dragon was people watching as he did every Thursday. It had always interested him to watch every completely new face walk by. Mothers, brothers, friends, and strangers all going about their day, so unique and yet so similar never knowing how very bonded they are by just being average, ordinary people. However, as much as Dragon enjoyed this, he was in search for a specific person. The same woman he had been searching for every Thursday for almost a year. It was near the time he had lost his older brother and she had come to him like an angel. She was the most beautiful person he had ever seen. She was different but it seemed only he could sense this. And even though she had been an unusually pretty woman, after a few weeks her vivid appearance had dimmed from his mind. He knew though, that this woman was his angel. It was a delicate sanguinity, but Dragon continued to search for her in the hopes that if he found his angel again, she would bring his brother. Every day he looked, but she remained indefinable and even her memory struggled to survive.

The boy knew that she had fair skin not scarred by knifes or obscured by dirt. Cherry red lips parted around perfect, even white teeth. And her hair, a shimmering golden brown, would have found a way to shine even in this sunless sky. Her eyes were two oceans of blue-green. She was a fading memory of perfection, but she was worth the fight.

She had been escorted by a balding, middle-aged man. He was as unpleasant to look at as she was beautiful. The older man had a large pot belly which seemed to put a strain on his fading black suit, and the buttons traveling up the fabric were threatening to burst off. His lank hair, which was probably a ginger in his prime, was now streaked with gray and looked as dull as his brown eyes. The hair he had lost on his crown could be seen growing in a great abundance from each oversized nostril. The man spoke loudly to those he recognized on the street and steered the unwilling young woman around, almost as if she were a dog.

As the people surrounding him started to lose interest, the man had spotted Dragon staring at the pair with wide, curious eyes. The man raised his large nose up at the boy, glaring in a superior way. He had been sitting in the same spot he was now.

“The dirty little thief!” he had exclaimed to those around him. “Just looking over at us, trying to find what’s best to steal, no doubt!”

Honestly, Dragon wouldn’t have stolen anything from the man. He knew how to tell those who appeared to have money from those who actually were wealthy. The balding man’s suit was too small for him and, if you looked closely, fraying at the ends. While the woman wore a simple strand of pearls, the man didn’t wear anything of the sort. No jewels, not even a pocket watch. But Dragon was particularly looking at his hands. He knew that you could tell a lot about a person by simply looking at their hands.

His hands were large, and calloused, with grime from the days work still embedded under his fingernails. He had obviously worked his entire life. It was always easy to tell if someone was rich, because their hands were almost always unmarked by any type of work. They were always clean hands, if you didn’t count betrayal or greed, something you really never can wash off the skin. Dragon was no saint, but he only saw reason to steal from the wealthy. He knew that it was much easier to steal from them and it was always easier for them to replace what he took.

“C’mon sweetheart, we better get going. Much to do today,” he said, grabbing her elbow.

When he walked past Dragon he scoffed and spit, barely missing him. If he wasn’t a born thief he would have missed it, but a pale hand had grabbed a silver coin from the man’s pocket, and quicker than a rattlesnake, dropped it in his lap. His angel touched one delicate finger to her full lips and turned away.

Light, the brilliant shade of yellow-white flashed with such stark contrast against the miserable clouds, it made the boy go temporarily blind. Then, almost as if the lightening had shattered open the sky, rain fell in thick droplets over the empty town. Dragon threw his arms over his head in a weak attempt to shelter himself from the freezing rain. It clung to his greasy black hair, beading up at the ends, before dripping down his cheeks in tiny rivulets and leaving grimy patterns across his face. Water pooled in the indentation where his shoulder and collar bone met. He gave a violent shudder, sneezed and put his arms around his chest, fighting to keep warm.

The rain felt like icy whips on his skin and he hardly noticed when a dark shape came over him, blocking the downpour. It took Dragon a moment to realize that the water was no longer pelting his skin. He looked up, blinking stupidly as a large, broad-shouldered woman hunkered over him.

**So this is my newest project I've been working on. It's rather large so I'll be posting it in parts. I want to perfect each section!! Even if it takes FOREVER, with some tough critiques, I'll be eternally grateful to finally get the ball moving on this guy. :) Thank you all!!!

Comments & reviews · 2
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I think the repetition of sky in the second line was a mistake. I wasn't sure if it was a typo so I decided to put it in this comment box. If you purposely put it there, I would consider changing it. It sounds wrong : "cast a glance at the sky dark, flinty sky."

I really like the little boy so far. I don't know why since really it doesn't describe him but his encounter with his angel. I also like her. She was sweet giving him that coin. What I wonder, is she a real angel or someone that he just sees as an angel in his little boy mentality? I like you're description of the large man... he reminded me of walrus from Alice in Wonderland.

I really enjoyed. Hope this helped a little :)

Thank you! Also...yes that was a typo. Oops! How did I miss that? >.< To answer your question, she is not a real angel. This is a rather long story so I won't say much more, but no...this is realistic fiction. :)

User avatar
katngo73
Review

I love this! I was intrigued by your description and title, so awesome!
A few nitpicks, first:
"Mothers, brothers, friends, and strangers all going about their day, so unique and yet so similar never knowing how very bonded they are by just being average, ordinary people. "
There should be a comma between similar and never. And change "by just" to "just by". Sounds better. :)
"The boy knew that she had fair skin not scarred by knifes or obscured by dirt."
Comma between skin and not. And perhaps even add "even" after the not?
Other than that, keep writing!
And just to clarify, this whole story is the boy recollecting his thoughts on the "Angel", right?
Thanks!
<3

Correct! He's remembering a past encounter...his only encounter with her, actually. Thank you for the review!



A snowball in the face is surely the perfect beginning to a lasting friendship.
— Markus Zusak, The Book Thief