Published September 8, 2008
Is it ice? Is it fire? Is it wind or is it rain?
The questions persist while it gains,
Unable to prevent, only to protect from it
The storm blows on, impossible to outwit,
Gaining speed it moves closer to the land,
Reaping havoc before its entrance,
Chaos spins out of control and the wind,
It continues to churn the storm ever more.
Lightning adds to the deadly cocktail,
An inferno starts, the screams begin
And the fear ensues, loss inevitable
The Tempest fresh from the anvil
From the ravaging we seek revenge,
We try to predict, but unlike a disease
Unlike anything we have witnessed;
No missile can destroy the tempest.
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Any reviews and votes on the poll would be helpful - thanks 
.
I just got told it was bad on the polls and that's fair enough, any chance I could get a couple reviews as to WHY it was bad and how I could improve it? Ta.
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140,703 Literary Works • 673,672 Reviews
i love how you use the questions at the beginning to arouse a sense of wonder.
The poem is very gripping, Congrats on using synonyms like 'tempest' and 'storm.'
some people don't, and it gets boring. Even better though is at the end where you say
"no missile can destroy the tempest" It gives a sense of how truly vulnerable humankind is to the power of nature. The word tempest to me has a kind of majestic ring maybe partially because I played a piece in band that showcased an oceanic storm.
Keep writing!
I found it very intriguing, I do poetry like you at least somewhat the same :]
A lot of people don't like that it doesn't rhyme but, I find that the meaning is more
important. I may be wrong but hey, there's not really a wrong way to write unless
you like going by the book (being non-original) Well I'm so happy i took my time to
read this i hope you add more to your portfolio ;]
--Mackenzie L.
This was okay. Your rhyming is a bit off - you start with an AABB scheme, then the second stanza didn't rhyme at all, and the rest seems filled with words that...sort of rhyme, but sort of don't. You did well in describing the tempest itself, though I'm not sure how it could be mistaken for ice or fire....it could be ice cold, I suppose, or dangerous like fire, if that's what you meant, which is fine. I would just like to hear about the damage it's doing, not just what it is, but how it is affecting everything else - buildings, people, animals and so on. This is a good start, it's just the rhyming that needs a little work and I would like to hear more about the effects of the tempest. Keep writing.