Smile sweetly dear, in the way you always do, and I'll let it crush me in the way it always does, so I can still dream of that smile being directed at me, in the way it never will.
Don't get me wrong, for simply because you are my hopeless obsession doesn't mean I cannot find new love, it just means I can never adore a person as I adore you, since you still hold the biggest piece of my heart, and I still dream about you while asleep next to her.
In a way, it is the hopelessness of this obsession that allows me to love another while I reach out to you forever, because it makes me realize that nothing will ever come of the spark I thought I felt on that day we first met.
Sometimes I look back to then, and reflect on those extinct conversations we had just to get my daily dose of heartache that I have come to accept as the next best thing to actually sharing love with you, and sometimes, like right now, I sink into a corner and bleed out my thoughts onto a page for nobody to read, as if writing to myself could ever solve my problems.
I've stopped trying to let go, and I've realized that I won't soon be getting out of this whirlpool of insanity that I am drifting softly on, like the ice flow on the bay that I so desperately wanted to ride out past the horizon and drown alone as it melted away.
The only thing keeping me in this world is the hopeful fear that you might actually miss me when I go, as if you cared, or knew.
What you don't realize is that every lyric comes back to you, but there aren't enough rhyming words to put in a song for it to mean anything more than the fact that I can get emotional and sing through my tears behind a closed door in the middle of the night, still hiding from you, my beautiful nightmare.