Www

This is in no way relevant to the work, but you have an epic username. I would never have been able to come up with that in a million years. That is very original.

As for your poem, I am very confused. Are you being serious, or joking, or being self-referential, self-conscious, etc.? The opening line, "the moon is an Oreo", is absolutely hilarious, intentional or not. It is so random, especially if compared with the stanzas that will come up. It sounded like you were clutching at thin straws for a meaningful opening line, because the breakdown of Www wasn't enough (I suppose).

The second portion really makes me feel bad about laughing the first bit, because it is so serious and with references to either physical violence or self-harm. Or a robbery/mugging, by a pretty violent individual. However, your opening line spoils it because now I expect everything else to be a joke or the build-up to a joke that only the author laughs at. Either way, I am unsure of how I'm supposed to react to this.

That third part, about being emo was really snobby and actually rather spiteful, as if you assume the reader will have the same reaction to that. Maybe it was supposed to be relatable or humorous, but instead of the intended chuckle, you receive a statue-esque marble face from me. Then, it dawns on me- this person is running away, because they feel afraid, even though this is not the desired action. I felt sorry for this speaker, but with that rather snotty presumption of intent and judgment, I don't care about them anymore.

I tried to read onto the fourth and fifth, but found that the third portion annoyed me so much that I stopped caring. You really need to clear up the speaker's attitude.

I'm quite confused. What happened to this person? Did he/she get mugged?

Not knowing what happened to him/her does diminish my feeling for him/her. Not going to lie. It sounds like he/she is doing some weird, self-harm experiment. Does he/she have a death wish?

I guess 'emo' would be a safe term to apply here.

I do like the imagery in this poem. The line "The moon is an oreo" is delightfully off-putting. The juxatposition of a timeless romantic symbol (the moon) with a symbol for unnatural, processed food (the oreo) places the locale for this story squarely in Somewhere, U.S.A. The emo thing only intensifies this impression for me.

I have to say, I think the best line in this is "Cutting off all communication so I examine darkness". As a teenager aching to write, I desired many times just to walk out the door of my parents' suburban house, and just walk out alone into the quiet moonlit night. Not telling anyone where I was going, just strolling under the streetlamps and listening to the rustle of the trees, and "examining darkness".

As I'm sure you understand, there are several influences that stop us from doing such things most of the time.

I enjoyed that bit of insight in your poem, however. Interesting work.

ok so I don't know if its the way I read it but I really enjoyed this little poem. It wasn't completely obvious what you were talking about the entire time; I liked that. I also enjoyed the short lines. It gave it a flow that I really like when im reading poems. I do think that there's room to make this longer and kind of make it come to a specific..topic. My absolute favorite part of this was "Blood still running...phone still broken." I didn't really like the way it ended. I think you could probably relate it more to the last few lines, in a way. Great poem

Hello!! So i do my reviews a little different, but hey that makes me a special reviewer right? ok so first thing is first.. I LOVE this haha, i honestly am not sure why. i find it different and creative. i really like the way you have this set up and your word choices. It also surprised me in the Begin, because you started by saying the moon looked like an oreo, so i didn't think it was going to lead to blood and sleeping behind dumpsters. Another thing is maybe naming your poem something, like ,well, i don't know, umm Oreo? The last line does bug me a bit, i do not see how it ties in to the whole poem. If you explain why then maybe i will haha
~Bam