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Hello! So sorry you've had to wait this long for a second review!
hm... You know, poetry doesn't have to rhyme, but what it does need is rhythm. And this poem doesn't have much, which I think you need to work on. Try reading the poem aloud to yourself and seeing if it sticks in your head, or at least sounds good (or professional, if that's the term you'd prefer to use). That usually works.
I like how you played with words that sound the same but aren't- like 'mourning' and 'morning', and 'pane' and 'pain'. But I don't think they worked. for example, 'mourning' doesn't seem like the right word for what you're feeling in the poem, even if it does sound clever and convenient.
You can't 'sigh with a groan', because those are two different noises one can make. A sigh is generally indicating disappointment or longing, and a groan is usually an indicate of annoyance and frustration, generally. I'm not saying you couldn't be all of those emotions at the same time;of course you can- but what I'm saying is that you can't make both the sounds at the same time. I would honestly take out the 'groan' part, because you just wanted it to pair with 'grown'.

I didn't understand the last stanza, with the hair- your hair would kill the monsters?
and if you died, where did the monsters go?
but, I'm guessing you're not saying that you actually died-it's just a metaphor. but it doesn't make that much sense, so I would clarify by saying, i. e., that a part (specify which part?) of you died.
Sorry I'm being so hard on you... I'm a really harsh critic, so don't take everything I say to heart-just keep it at arm's length. Have a good, day, and happy writing!

Hello! So sorry you've had to wait this long for a second review!
hm... You know, poetry doesn't have to rhyme, but what it does need is rhythm. And this poem doesn't have much, which I think you need to work on. Try reading the poem aloud to yourself and seeing if it sticks in your head, or at least sounds good (or professional, if that's the term you'd prefer to use). That usually works.
I like how you played with words that sound the same but aren't- like 'mourning' and 'morning', and 'pane' and 'pain'. But I don't think they worked. for example, 'mourning' doesn't seem like the right word for what you're feeling in the poem, even if it does sound clever and convenient.
You can't 'sigh with a groan', because those are two different noises one can make. A sigh is generally indicating disappointment or longing, and a groan is usually an indicate of annoyance and frustration, generally. I'm not saying you couldn't be all of those emotions at the same time;of course you can- but what I'm saying is that you can't make both the sounds at the same time. I would honestly take out the 'groan' part, because you just wanted it to pair with 'grown'.

I didn't understand the last stanza, with the hair- your hair would kill the monsters?
and if you died, where did the monsters go?
but, I'm guessing you're not saying that you actually died-it's just a metaphor. but it doesn't make that much sense, so I would clarify by saying, i. e., that a part (specify which part?) of you died.
Sorry I'm being so hard on you... I'm a really harsh critic, so don't take everything I say to heart-just keep it at arm's length. Have a good, day, and happy writing!

Hey there! I'm Kekai, here to review your poem. You have a really interesting concept here; from my understanding of it, the narrator is expressing the feelings that she has regularly, but never shows--what lies beneath. I really love your imagery and metaphors in this piece, I feel like those are all executed very nicely.
The only things that I had a little bit of trouble with were the phrasing and the rhyme scheme. I think I'll go through this stanza by stanza, just so I can get all my comments in.

"i woke up mourning in the morning.
heavy rain knocked on my window
and shattered the pane.
my body was intact but my mind in pain."
I really like your play on words with mourning vs. morning, but I feel like the phrasing of the sentence itself is a little bit awkward. May I suggest "i woke up in the morning, mourning." That way, the message is intact, but the play on words is closer together and sounds more smooth. Also, for the last line, I would suggest "my body was intact, but my mind was in pain." Just having that comma and the extra word will help with understanding.

"sighed with a groan as my emptiness had grown.
i had a dark hole lingering in my head which
kept me from feeling whole."
Here, I would suggest separating the first line into two separate lines. It helps keep it uniform with the rest of the poem, and accentuates the play on words.

"i figured drying my hair would reach down
and kill the monsters in my head.
but i'm the only one who died."
Once again, I would suggest separating, and rephrasing the first line. Maybe change the whole verse to:
"i figured drying my hair
would kill the monsters in my head
but i'm the only one
who died."
It's hard to understand the reach down part, so I would suggest cutting it. I'm not so sure about my edit, but you get what I mean right?

In all though, I think this poem has fabulous potential. Keep up the great work!