12+ Violence

The Sun Children I - Prologue - Draft 1

This is where the entire Sun Child legacy kicks off. You might have read the Sun Children V prologue, which is written in the same format, but unlike that, this one does not span out over such a great length of time. Whereas TSCV spans about 1600 years, this spans a matter of 1 year, but its about how the Sun Children got their abilities. You might notice the link in with Elansar the Bloodburner ;)

Heres the link to the TSCV prologue

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/work.php?id=103341

Hopefully you'll enjoy thisif you decide to read it! :) bearing in mind i wont be writing TSCI for a number of years yet i wanted to see how this went, so its a test!! :D

Prologue

The Era of the Sun

1542EB

Blood. It’s the very thing that keeps them alive, the people of the falling world. How can a civilization survive when so much has been spilt?What left is there when all that brought life and happiness is taken, when the skies begin to grow dark and fear fills hearts? An entire Era of bloodshed slipped into memory. The savage hands of kings and lords fell into the ground or went up in flames. But the lust for power…it never dies.

It was a day like any other. The sun began to rise. There was a tempestuous glow that came with the dawn. Its ascent shook the ground and the skies were torn apart. Lights appeared, and they bore fire and bled smoke. They fell from the sky like gods being thrown from the netherworlds.

One great entity blazed through the amber clouds, leaving black clouds behind it. Many of those that fell to the world were lost to the vast oceans of blues and bronzes.

This one however, fell into lands of ruins and remnants of a bygone age. Arinalgar was where it fell, into the eastern lands that had been dead for many years. It was the smallest of things – the stone from the skies. It lay in its crater, burning and searing. Strange wisps of amber and black wandered from the smouldering object as if the entity was feeling the air.

The dust that blew back from the burning fields seemed to take with it the darkness of the Blood Era. The skies still burned. Trails of smoke were slow to fade. The light that came with the falling of the gods was a sign that new times were to come. That was the day that the new Era began. The Era of the Sun.

1ES

It was not long before the people, still cowering from the fiery skies, began to grow wondrous about what had fallen into the world. None grew more curious than the King to the Realm of Arzornia. His name was Ansar. Although a crown lay upon his head, it was the five Lords that sat at his side that seemed to hold the power. They were the eyes and ears of the King, informing him of everything that happened beyond his far reaching sight. In the days before the new era they had began to twist the King’s mind, controlling him, corrupting him. He was made to cause atrocities that need not be done. Towns burned and people fled. They crawled to the other Realms; Alornia and Erivania.

When the day came that the skies burned in the sunrise and a comet fell to the Wastes of Amar in the east, the Lords convinced their King to bring back the fallen. He was not the only one however. Fearing the power that Arzornia might find, Alornia and Erivania also went after that which still smouldered in the ground. Three realms began to slaughter one another in the darkest civil war the country had ever seen. Coats of blues and reds and greens butchered one another until at last Arzornia threw down their contenders.

Arsur’s brother, Ronsar was the first to lay eyes upon the stone. He climbed down into the crater and held the stone in his hand. It was light, yet it put a heaviness in his mind. The amber and black wisps of energy seemed to wrap around him and sunk into his flesh. He could feel something strange and powerful inside him, and he assumed that he had been given the power by the god thought to be trapped inside the stone.

As victors he and his armies returned to the city of Agar, hidden within the Arzornian Mountains. The people of his brother were not as gracious about his return as he would have liked. He heard whispers that he was drunk with power, and even his brother began to suspect him. In those days Ronsar kept the stone hidden, and many feared what he was to do. He began to organise a coup. His underground armies slaughtered hundreds who refused to bow to him. The black and gold halls of the underground city became shed in innocent blood and echoed in their screams. The eyes of the five Lords saw all that moved, and they had Ronsar seized, and he was executed by his brother. The stone was taken and put away, deep inside the Kings royal chambers where no one could get to it.

Ansar did not question how his Lords saw so much, and still they watched as he returned to his pregnant wife when all was safe again. Eladar had been heavily guarded when the people were being thrown down in the city below, and as the months went on, she began to feel something. She fell ill, and whilst the King was distracted by her declining health, his Lords assumed governance of the Realm, and began to cast a shadow over Arzornia’s people.

Still the stone lingered in chambers of the King. Eladar’s veins began to grow black. She began to burn up and blood was choked up from her insides. Her cries of agony kept the Citadel awake at night. Her eyes turned red and her nails brittle from scratching the bed as she writhed in agony. Ansar could feel something strange coming from the stone, but before he could get rid of it, Eladar began to give birth.

Her screams and wretched wailing were harrowing to hear, and from her pain she bore a child – a girl. They were smothered in dark blood and bronze hair grew upon their head. It was different from the darker hair of her parents. It was then that Eladar began to howl once again, and before long another child arrived into the world - a boy. The twins cried, as did their mother, but soon she fell silent, and the black blood stopped flowing.

Ansar was driven by grief at the death of his beloved wife, and he looked into her lifeless eyes and grew angry at the children he had been left with. He took the death as a sign that the birth of the twins was a bad omen, and a punishment for restraining the god that was thought to be living within the stone.In despair, Ansar sent his children away to be forgotten about whilst he returned to the throne a bitter man. He saw the misery his Lords had caused at the cost of their own greed, and he had them exiled. He was left without family, left without those he thought he could trust, and left without a stable mind. His hair went white in but a few months, and he died soon after, falling before the black stone that lay hidden in his chamber. It was said that the gods had killed a king because he was not worthy of worship as they were. It was said that he got what he deserved for thinking he could enslave the almighty.

Eladar’s brother was the only man reliable enough to run the country whilst the twins were too young to rule. He had the stone hidden in the deepest depths of the underground city below the Citadel that stood above the clouds, and there it remained.

Priests and priestesses kept the twins safe within Agar. None but they knew the heirs were hidden there, within the temple of the Citadel. The day came when they were named and their eyes opened to the world.

The girl was named Elansar, and she had the blue eyes of her father.

The boy was named Daransar, and he had the green eyes of his mother.

The energy of the stone flowed through their veins, and the air began to grow warm and thick. A candle was brought into their chamber where they lay, but its bearer walked into their cries, for they felt the pain of whatever was in their blood, and the candle erupted into a heavy flame that sent the candle bearer back through the doorway in a ball of flames and a flourish of agonising screams.The priests gathered and talked about what the twins were and what they were capable of, and they agreed. They must have been sent as guardians from the netherworlds, reincarnated from whatever lived within the stone.

Their twins’ fire had awoken. The legacy of their kind had begun.Years from that day they were to be known as something else. The Sun Children.

Comments & reviews · 2
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I felt the prologue, as a prologue draft, was descent, and outside of some minor grammar/spelling things rather okay. I'm not really familiar with your TSCV series, so don't know how these things connect to it, but feel like you have a good world established, with only some minor questions left in my mind. What kind of religious system does this society have? Do they believe in gods of the underworld/netherwords, or just spirits, or what? And what are the 'gods' the King supposedly offended? Hope that gives you an idea of what a first time reader's going to come across (since I prefer to read things in internal chronological order).
And when I first read Arzornia I thought it was Arizona. :)
Hope this helps!

Hey there! Stef here to give you a review :)
I loved this!
Honestly, your descriptive style is awesome, on par with a lot of books that I've read :) You have a way with words that just got me to read and read until there was no more :)
Plot wise, you've got me going and I can't wait to read more. This is just a prologue draft but it's still amazingly well done, to the point that it draws me in.
I've nothing else to note, a splendid job indeed



Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.
— Bishop Desmond Tutu