Hi Myth! Valkyria here to leave a review for your lovely work. So, let's get into it:
I love how this is formatted. The whole poem being in italics makes it feel like it's an actual story. Honestly, if this was multiple chapters longer, it could be an epic. I also like how the poem flows. It does feel like something someone would sing
or tell the tale to an audience in medieval times. I like how some of the lines are long and flowery with description, but short and sharp when it came to the actual battle.
Since this is a story with plot, I would have liked there to be a clear beginning that introduced the conflict. We jump right into Lunisear riding to meet the dragon, but why? Is he a warrior? What threat was the dragon causing that needed it to be slayed? You also introduced the dragon as a worm, but I didn't know it was actually a dragon until it was stated. I understand that dragons could be called worms but make it clearer.
Overall, this was a great fantasy poem. I loved the ballad style. And the imagery felt very immersive. Thank you for publishing! I hope we see more of your poems!
Points: 13332
Reviews: 180
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