OH Poor Wayfaring Stranger
Why take the route that no one goes.
Dragging along false promises and reckless self-hate.
Avoiding all touch, stating the need to contemplate.
OH Poor Wayfaring Stranger
Why will you say and do what others don’t approve?
Replying to their negative notions with patience and a silence as quiet as the ocean.
Back and forth, up and down. This is the cycle of your sad existence, yet still you seem to drive on with almost effortless persistence.
OH Poor Wayfaring Stranger
Why must you take the lonely road?
Seeking none of the riches and gold that these people hold.
Choosing instead to live a life of simplicity and solitaire.
Holding onto faith to which many do not dare.
OH Poor Wayfaring Stranger
The way you find peace puzzles me greatly.
Here I witness people chasing primal desires yet remaining empty.
Here you travel through this world alone, through the black and cold.
Standing tall amongst the people, despite what you’ve been told.
OH Poor Wayfaring Stranger
I was once reluctant but now I feel free.
To express my kindness and sympathy.
You, oh one who seems so small and weak.
Have taught me what to believe in. When all seems hopeless and bleak.
You need no longer suffer at the hands of any woman or man.
For I have come forth to extend my hand.
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Hi, there, Messenger!
First I have to say that I don't claim to be religious myself, though I've attended church and religious schools at different points in my life, so I'm familiar with general narratives of faith. Which means I've been familiar with this idea of turning the other cheek, continuing on the path of faith no matter what is happening around you. It's similar to me desiring my students to continue to use good manners and to be decent people no matter what the kids in the other classes are acting like. It's hard -- it's really hard for humans, because I think part of our nature is that we are social creatures, and social creatures generally like to act similarly to the other members of their group. So it's hard, it doesn't make sense, and yet in terms of logic we can recognize it as "right".
You have several parts that begin with "OH Poor Wayfaring Stranger", and that makes me wonder, if you could only choose ONE of them to carry your poem, which would you choose and why? What would make you decide to leave the other ones behind? What makes one stronger to you than another?
Finally, I am confused by the voice that comes in at the end. At first, it seems like it is the author of the poem, a human, trying to live a similarly good and faithful life. But then the last two lines say "You need no longer suffer at the hands of any woman or man./ For I have come forth to extend my hand", now the voice seems like a higher power, higher than the righteous walker, and I'm lost. I don't want to be lost anywhere in the poem, but especially not at the end, because that's my last impression I get to carry with me after reading.
I hope these thoughts are helpful to you! If you have any questions/comments about this review, please PM me or reply here.
Good luck, and thanks for sharing,
Hannah
Excuse my French! But God damn! This has been one of the most Insightful reviews I have recieved in a long time and I appreciate your concerns about my poem. I chose the "OH Poor Wayfaring Stranger" as the repetitive notion in the poem is because I was inspired by the many holy texts in which a recurring theme is the repitition of the consituational values and responsibilities that God had bestowed onto Man. However Man being Man usually forgot the old constitution and thus God had to remind him again through more holy texts and prophets. I used this as inspiration so that I repeated the notion of the "Poor Wayfaring Stranger" as to remind people of who the stranger is and what the situation of the stranger is in the world. As for the ending I personally liked this poem because of the ambiguity of the ending. Something that makes the reader ponder and question means that the piece of writing has far more to offer that to say a text tht fully explains everything from start to finish. These are just my personal preferences for writing however and I ain't trying to force anyone to adhere to my dogmatic beliefs. I hope this clears up any problems you had understanding this. Take care and have a nice day.
hey!
This is great!
Thank You Kimmycat!
Hi there! I love the theme and I love the emotion in this poem. First off, this line;
.
"Yet dragging with you false promises and reckless self-hate."
Was a little confusing, especially when you read the first two lines. Is the second line supposed to be a question? Either way, the third line is confusing and a little awkward to read. I would either change the first two lines, or this one. Maybe something like this; "Yet you drag with you false promises and reckless self-hate." Just a suggestion.
"Why will you say and do what others don’t approve." Is this supposed to be a question? It's phrased as one.
"You, oh one who seems so small and weak, have taught me what to believe in when all seems hopeless and bleak."
This line needs to be shortened into two verses.
I would do something like this:
"You, oh one who seems so small and weak,
Have taught me to believe in. (believe in what? I would explain that in the poem.)
When all is (or seemed) hopeless and bleak."
That was all I saw. Again, I really liked the theme and the feeling expressed in here. I hope this was helpful. Keep writing!