My Last Wish

My Last Wish
“I’m tired, but then I’m always tired aren’t I? Illness will do that to you. Exhaust you more than you would assume. I’ve been here for two months now, this hospital not this room. I moved into this room today actually, I guess they don’t want me to infect anyone else. We wouldn’t want to start another epidemic. Ha. The first epidemic is the reason I’m here in the first place. If it hadn’t been for that stupid flu outbreak lowering my body’s defenses I wouldn’t have been infected. Actually, no, no that’s not true. I probably would have gotten sick anyway but I need something to blame. I need a reason for why I’m missing drivers ed. For why my mother cries at the end of all our visits, or for why the doctors all look at me with pity and frustration. I don’t understand why they lie to me. I know that I’m dying, it just doesn’t seem real yet so I’m not scared. I suppose you want to know the name of my disease right? Well, if I’m going to tell you that I might as well tell you the whole story.”
“Are you guys signed up for the flu shots?” I ask setting my lunch tray on the table and sitting beside my friends. Kyla shrugs snatching the bag of carrots from me and popping one in her mouth. I roll my eyes and snatch the bag back handing her a few. She smiles and answers my question.
“Yeah, Riana and I already handed in the forms, you?”
“I keep forgetting to take them home.” This is a lie, and Kyla knows it’s a lie. She raises her eyebrow in a questioning manner just as Riana joins us.
“What’s up?” She asked completely unaware of the looks I was dodging from Ky.
“Cassie over here still hasn’t shown her parents the immunization permission form.” She tattled as I glared at her. Riana rolls her eyes.
“Come on Cas you know they’re gonna have to see it sooner or later.”
“I know Rye but still, I’m waiting until I can think of a sound argument.” I explain. Kayla laughs without humour.
“If that’s what you’re waiting for it’s gonna be a while until you’re parents see the form.” I return to glaring at her but unfortunately know she’s right. Sigh.
“Yeah, I know. I better go put those forms in my bag, be right back,” slinging my bag over my shoulder I called out behind me. “And don’t touch my pizza Ky!” I heard Riana’s laughter and didn’t need to look behind me to see the sullenly expression of a guilty Kyla.
“That was the last time I saw my friends, and with my condition I think it always will be. But I’m okay with that. It’s a nice memory, nothing special, just three girls sitting together at lunch. I’m sure you’re curious though, why that was my last meeting with them. Well when I was upstairs at my locker the bell rang and I had to get to class. Riana, Kyla, and I don’t share any classes so we couldn’t see each other for the last two periods. I wonder, if we’d known that was the last time we would ever see each other, would we have done anything differently? Probably. But we didn’t know, no one could have known what was coming.”

I was in social studies and we were studying the Canadian provinces, nothing special. The teacher asked who can name the capital of Ontario. I raised my hand but he called on someone else, a girl named May I think. I put my hand down on the desk but it started shaking. My eyes widened as I used my other hand to try and stop the shaking, but I couldn’t. It wasn’t just my arm that was vibrating, I was shaking, I was having a seizure. Mr. Seabrook stood up just as my eyes slipped shut and I lost consciousness.
When I woke up it was to beeping. Not the blaring beeping of my alarm clock but the constant beeping of a heart monitor. Heavy eyelids peeled back to show me a horribly white room with a bouquet of white roses on a small table. Confused I tried to push myself up when I felt an uncomfortable tug on my arm. Looking down I saw the plastic tube stuck in my arm that seemed to be feeding me. “What the heck is going on?!” I yelled having enough of the confusion. Immediately a man in a white lab coat came running into the room followed closely by my parents.
“Cassie, good to see you awake.” The man, my suspicion was that he was doctor but I couldn’t confirm it, greeted me by name. My parents however were less…controlled. My mom flung herself at me carefully avoiding the I.V. tube and engulfed me in a hug. My father came up behind her with tears in his eyes. Okay now that was scaring me. My father never cried. Never.
“Mom, Dad, what’s going on?” I asked cautiously and slowly hugging my mom back. Mom lets me go and exchanges a look with Dad, the look that says she doesn’t want to say something and is silently begging him to say it for her. Dad’s nod is almost unnoticeable but it’s obvious he agrees when he sits down on the side of my bed and takes my hand.
“Cassie,” he starts, “you were at school and you had a seizure. You started convulsing on the ground and your teachers had to call the paramedics.”
I was confused. Why couldn’t I remember any of that? I should remember that. More importantly why was I here? I’ve had seizures before and never had to stay more than a few hours at the hospital. Dad saw the confusion on my face and continued.
“It’s different this time, Cas, they can’t explain it this time. They think your brain’s sick. But don’t worry because I’m sure you’re going to be fine” He explained with the tears barely held back. The doctor, who up to this point had been silent, ushered my parents out telling them that they need to do a few tests now that I was awake. That was the start of my two month stay in that hospital. After that I was transferred to a more advanced medical treatment center in the States. They didn’t know what I had, they didn’t know how to treat it. Everyday hurt me more and more but not because of the disease. Because everyday there was that line again from my parents.
“Don’t worry,” they’d say, “I’m sure today they’ll figure it out.” Or they’d say. “Don’t worry Cas, the treatment today will make you feel better.” They didn’t believe their own words and I wondered how long until those words would turn into, “don’t worry Cassie just look for Jesus when you see the light.” I wasn’t stupid but I was dying.

“So I think that’s where you came in, and I’m rambling now aren’t I? You just wanted my name, disease, and wish while I’m over here spouting my whole life story. So let me try this again. Hi, my name’s Cassandra Cassie Malcolm and I’m dying of a new disease called Malcolm’s Syndrome. My one wish is to see my friends once more before I die, so I can tell them how much better they made my life.” The lady from Make a Wish stood up, shook my hand, and thanked me for my time. She seemed to know that what little I had left was precious. Then she left and I went back to my normal schedule. Nothing changed except my range of movement, I was bedridden and I knew, even if no one would tell me I knew the end was near. That’s where I am now actually. Lying here waiting for my doctors to come and take my vitals. This had become such a common affair that I didn’t even look up when the door opened. That is, not until I heard her speak.
“Hey Cassie.” My head snapped up faster than a bullet at that sound and tears filled my eyes when I saw Riana and Kyla standing there. Not hesitating for a minute they both came over to sit on the edge of my bed as I desperately fiddled with the remote trying to make the bed hold me up in a sitting position. I didn’t know what to say, I had never actually thought my wish would make it through the screening process, I never thought they would be here. But I didn’t need to say anything because at that moment Kyla cried, and Riana cried, and I cried. We cried for all the months apart, we cried for the fact that this would be our last meeting, and we cried because we were scared. And when we finished crying we talked. We talked about everything under the stars and when we couldn’t talk anymore we sat together writing a poem. The last poem that we would ever write together. Hours passed but not once did I see either Kyla or Riana look at the clock, and not once did I see either stare at all the machines I was hooked up to. Because they didn’t care. They only cared that we still had time and none of us planned on wasting it.

Two days later I was surrounded by my family, Riana, and Kyla. I closed my eyes that day, and I didn’t open them again.