Published November 26, 2005
I thought he was kind
I thought he was wise
I thought he was funny
I thought he was free
But there she was
Her blonde hair
Her sparkling blue eyes
There to take him away
I wasn’t smart enough
I wasn’t pretty enough
I wasn’t funny enough
But I was free
And know I’m free of life
Free of obligation
Free of emotion
Especially love
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141,757 Literary Works • 675,688 Reviews
This is suffocatingly OTT (Over The Top).
"Free," "sparkling," "smart," "pretty," "funny."
A five-year old could have come up with those words. Poetry comes from the investigation of the Self -- this investigation did not occur here. And the repetition was dull, boring, soporific at best.
Trash this sucker, pull out a notebook, and lisp your navel-gazing verse away.