“Were I to host the graduation party in my home, the Royal Palace, I would fill the famous Fountain of Fortune with fire.”
Princess Alicia looked up from the single gilt-edged card that her speech was written on, and caught Nathaniel’s eye. He smiled at her in encouragement, and she continued.
The party she would hold, she explained, would be like nothing that Avery’s Academy for Future Female Rulers had ever seen. Harlequins, firebreathers, masked guests and spiced food. She described the moat filled with floating candles, the servers dressed in every colour of the rainbow, the circus performing death-defying feats. The younger girls gasped and listened to her with open mouths, the judges nodded thoughtfully to one another. Beside Nathaniel, Squire Charlie was watching Alicia with undisguised adoration.
“Nathaniel, do you know how lucky you are?”
Nathaniel tried not to smirk, watching Alicia flick her silver hair back casually as she spoke. But out of the corner of his eye, he couldn’t help but see the yellow head of Astrid Race, the Duchess of the Hazel Peninsula, sinking lower and lower.
With every word she spoke, Alicia was breaking her best friend’s heart in two.
“My party,” Alicia finished, “would truly be the perfect symbol of six girls entering a strange new world.”
In his training Nathaniel had been taught to count heads quickly. Seventeen people stood up as they applauded Alicia. Astrid did not even clap.
As Alicia glided off the stage to sit down, her five final-year classmates all leant over to talk to her.
“I thought you weren’t preparing anything,” said red-haired Genevieve loudly enough for Nathaniel and Charlie to hear three rows back.
“Just because you didn’t,” Charlie muttered, rolling his eyes. “Honestly, if my aunt and uncle had heard Gen’s speech, I think my aunt may have fainted.”
“No, Alicia said she hadn’t prepared anything,” Nathaniel confirmed, still watching the row of girls. Astrid was sitting stiffly next to the Princess, looking straight ahead at the now empty stage. “They were going to let Astrid win.”
“Why?”
Nathaniel shrugged. “Because she wanted it the most. She spent hours and hours preparing for this.” And, he would have bet, Alicia had simply stood up and said what came into her head.
“Astrid’s proposition was good,” Charlie said slowly. “But not better than Alicia’s. I mean, a party in a rose garden? It’s been done before, a thousand times.”
It was true. Nathaniel had been to far too many garden parties in his life. That was where he had first met Alicia, where he had first met all the girls. “I just don’t think Alicia should have done that, that’s all. It’s too much like a betrayal.”
“Whose side are you on, anyway, your fiancée’s or Astrid’s?”
“Firstly, she’s not my fiancée yet, and secondly, Charlie, knights never take any side except the side of justice. No wonder you failed the final exam. Again.”
Charlie flicked back the orange hair that he and Genevieve shared, unperturbed by the fact he was the only nineteen-year-old squire in the country. “I’ll get there eventually, I’m sure. But look, nobody is ever going to choose a party in Wolfe Castle over the Royal Palace, no matter how pretty the Hazel Peninsula might be.”
On this point, Nathaniel had to agree. Astrid’s home, Wolfe Castle, was crumbling and damp, whereas the image of Alicia’s ballroom bathed in golden light was practically irresistible. There was no question, though, that the competition was between the two of them, he thought, ticking the other girls off in his head. Genevieve’s party plan had been scrawled on a napkin at lunch beforehand. Antonia, Lady of Blue Wall, had spent longer describing the dress she would wear than the entertainment she would provide for her guests. Bette, Duchess of the Glass Islands, would have been a strong candidate except that speaking in front of crowds made her stutter. And Setter, Countess of Jagged Isle, in true Setter fashion, proposed a party in the dark where nobody was allowed to speak.
No, it would either be Alicia or Astrid who would win this final honour that Avery’s Academy afforded them.
Madame Avery stood up and took to the stage, sapphires glinting on her fingers and in her iron-grey hair.
“This year has had some particularly strong candidates,” she said, establishing a diplomatic tone to events, although Setter’s and Genevieve’s proposed parties were far from strong. “However, we believe there is one clear winner who went above and beyond in her preparations. That is why this year’s graduation party will be hosted by Her Royal Highness Princess Alicia.”
Alicia laughed gaily and humbly as she went onstage to shake the Headmistress’ hand and the room applauded. Some of the younger girls jumped up immediately, ready to leave as soon as possible.
Astrid’s seat was empty.
“Excuse me.” Nathaniel stood up and Charlie hurried to get out of his way, standing up only to knock his chair over backwards on a teacher behind him.
“Oh, my goodness, I am so sorry,” Charlie said, trying to right the chair, his face flushing madly behind its mass of freckles. Nathaniel slipped away.
He found Astrid sitting where the two of them so often sat, the third step up at the entrance of the Academy, her yellow blonde head in her hands. He took the steps two at a time and sat beside her, slinging an arm around her shoulders. She looked up in surprise, her mahogany coloured eyes rimmed red and damp.
“You-you should be inside with Liss.”
“You need me more than she does.”
Astrid’s next sob racked her whole body. Her dress- red to match the theme of her party- was hanging loose, the stress of this their last assignment had made her lose too much weight too quickly over the past few weeks.
“I-I thought I had won for sure,” she whispered. “I had it all planned. Ceci’s even bought a dress and –oh, gods, what will I tell Ceci?” She burst into a fresh spout of tears.
“Cecilia won’t mind,” he said, thinking of Astrid’s gentle, flat-faced and simple sister.
They sat in silence while the noise and yellow light of the hall filtered out of the windows.
“I preferred yours,” he told his friend truthfully. “I’m terrified of jesters.”
Astrid laugh-sobbed. “A knight, scared of anything? Surely not.”
“You’d be surprised by the amount that scares me.”
The people were now spilling out of the doors and Alicia tumbled down the steps.
“There you two are! How am I supposed to celebrate anything when my two favourite people in the world aren’t there?”
Nathaniel pushed himself up off the step and kissed Alicia on the soft skin of her forehead. “Congratulations,” he said softly, and she laughed again melodiously.
“I really just made it up on the spot. It just came to me, which was lucky, because what I originally had planned was entirely dull.”
Nathaniel smiled then jerked his head in the direction of Astrid, who was still sitting by herself, looking at the trees looming towards them. Alicia’s grey eyes widened and she moved towards Astrid.
“Oh, Ast, I am sorry.” She went down the steps. “I know it meant a lot to you. But you’ll help me plan my party, won’t you? It’ll be so much more fun if we do it together.”
Astrid sniffed and dabbed at her face with a handkerchief. “Of course I will. Congratulations.”
The two embraced. Only Nathaniel could see the tears still shining on Astrid’s face.
Author's Note- I usually am not a fan of prologues, so I don't know if this will stick around. Only this whole concept of a party is, while confusing and vague, important, and I thought showing this moment by itself would help clear up confusion later on. Also, I wanted to write something from Nathaniel's perspective- the rest will be from Astrid's. Thoughts? Particularly on clarity. Chapter One coming very soon! Thanks for reading!
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Hey there!
Though I'm not a fan of romances (which I think is where you are heading with this), this wasn't bad. I thik it was fine for a prologue, and think you can do much with the actual story, do to how vague this is. I didn't notice many grammatical or spelling errors, though I did spot a slight error when you said her "yellow blonde head", because most blonde hair is attributed to "yellow" hair. Other than that, I think the prologue allows for leeway in the story, so you won't be bound to something you addressed in the prologue. As far as writing the story from Nathaniel's perspective, I think that's a good idea, but I think that writing it from the two ladies perspectives would make it more interesting. Other than that, nice work.
~Epic
Hey Epic! Thanks for the review! The novel isn't actually a romance, although romance certainly plays a part, and the main body will all be told from Astrid's perspective (Alicia vanishes on account of being kidnapped by a dragon, the story revolves around finding her... xD) But thanks for the help!
Stella! So, the first read-through I was a bit lost until about half way though - who was who and why do they care? Then again, to add any more would be a total info-dump ^^
)
Anyway, definitely intriguing, and once I was done reading I think everything was clear enough - relationships are established, names, titles and such. I'm still unclear on some of the finer points, like social status (where do the knights/squires fit in with a princess/duchess, etc?), and what is Nathaniel, other than almost fiancee to Alicia?
Fun stuff, Stells! Tell me when you post more!
(also, "mahogany colored eyes"? That def. felt like a bit much