The Dream Book Chapter 2

As Cameron made her way down a street and ahead on a corner there was a beautiful cookie cutter

blonde woman out of place completely. She smiled at Cameron. “Perfect!” The woman said as

Cameron walked by her.

“What’s perfect?” Cameron stopped in her tracks. The woman was clearly speaking of or to her.

The woman replied, “Who better to help me find Gregory than his own partner!” The

woman would not stop smiling!

A rush of feeling came up through Cameron but she couldn’t figure out what it was; she

hadn’t felt it before. “How do you know Dr. Jones?”

The woman smiled yet again. When the Queen smiled all the time it was a friendly smile

but this girl’s smile looks forced and unnatural. Cameron narrowed her eyes at the woman. The

woman’s smiling irked her for some reason. “Oh Gregory and I spent some time in Cairo and we had a

little too much to drink. He told me all about him and you his cute little partner. He also told me about

how he started out as an Archie thing.”

“It’s called an archaeologist and I’m about two years older than you.” Cameron glared at

the woman. Then someone kissed Cameron on the cheek, picked her up, and spun her around.

“Jones put me down!” Cameron said as she laughed.

He did so. “What happened back there, come on tell me!” Jones looked past Cameron to the blonde and stopped smiling. He took his hands off of Cameron’s waist as if her waist was steaming hot. “Monica. Hi.” Cameron went back to glaring at Monica and crossed her arms. She fake smiled at Jones.

“Monica was just telling me how she learned your life story after a couple of drinks when it took me five years to ease it out of you.”

Jones knew Cameron was not happy.

Monica put her arms around his neck. “Gregory, darling, I haven’t seen you in forever!” Monica kissed him while Cameron became increasingly interested in a bird flying across the sky.

“I’ll be back at the hotel.” Cameron walked away without looking back. She reached what passed as a hotel and went into her room. She lied down on the bed and started to silently cry and talked to herself. “Stop that you shouldn’t care about him. He obviously doesn’t care about you.” Soon Jones was back in their room.

“I’ll see if I can move to a different room tonight so you and Monica can have this one.” Cameron spat at Jones.

Jones replied, “Lily-Rose I’m sorry about today. Last time we were together she never wanted to see me again.”

Cameron angrily shot back, “Then what the hell is she doing in Brazil putting her hand on you and kissing you! And don’t call me Lily-Rose!” He blushed and didn’t say anything but Cameron certainly did, “It took me forever to get you to tell me about yourself. But for Monica it took one night of drinking for you to say it and on top of that you let her call you by your first name! It sure does seem to me that she wanted to see you again! So where is the blonde anyways?”

Jones replied, “Down in the lobby waiting for me.”

Cameron heatedly said, “Waiting for you for what? For you to kick me out of the room so she can move in? Well that’s fine! I’ll get my stuff right now and go down to the lobby. I’ll just get another room!” Cameron started throwing her stuff into her huge backpack. “Oh, by the way here’s the treasure.”

She tossed it onto the bed while she kept throwing her stuff into her backpack. Jones walked right past it and slowly grabbed her arms. He gently pinned them down against her side. “Jack, she means nothing to me right now.”

“But she still meant something to you.” She looked away from his face.

“I’m going down there and telling her that she shouldn’t have come here.”

“Do you know what she called me? She called me, a cute little helper.” Jones

laughed, “Jones I’m two years old than her and she treated me like a child.”

Jones stopped laughing, “Okay I’m sorry Cameron.”

“What does she want anyways? Can you trust her?”

“I don’t know but I’ll tell her to leave.” Jones walked out of the door and twenty minutes later he came right back.

“What happened?”

“She couldn’t believe I would choose a girl like you over her and so she slapped me.”

Cameron covered her laugh with her hands. “Oh I’m sorry. Is there anything I can do to help?”

“Well,” they both stepped closer to each other till they were face to face. Jones leaned down toward her. “You could show me the treasure.” He turned toward the table and sat down in a chair.

Cameron slowly let out her breath she didn’t know she had been holding till now. She got the treasure and brought it to Jones feeling flighty.

That was a close one girl. Cameron thought to herself as she unwound the cloth off of the golden book as she told the story to Jones. He put on his glasses and turned the book over and over in his hands. “I was right to trust you to get this one your own.”

Cameron beamed at the compliment. “So what’s on the agenda next?”

“Well we will have to go home and put this one in the museum first then we will check with the Curator at the museum and we’ll go from there.”

“Okay. Let’s pack and leave right now.”

He smiled but packed anyways. Soon they were packed and went out the door. They hailed a taxi and went to the airport. They got on the plain and Cameron fell asleep. Halfway through the flight Cameron’s head slumped onto Jones’s shoulder. He jerked awake and looked down at her. He just stared at first deciding what to do and then smiled. He went back to sleep and soon they landed in Boston.

As they made their way back to Jones’s house Cameron was thinking long and hard about something. She vowed to herself that she would ask Jones right when they got inside the house. They paid the cabby and went inside Jones’s house.

“Jones, why did you pick me up and twirl me around?”

He stopped what he was doing and stared for a bit. “Well I didn’t know if you made it and I just knew you had something good.”

“You could have patted me on the back.”

He blushed and quickly said, “Lily-Rose you’re too young for me.”

Cameron fired back, “You mean too old for you. Monica is younger than me, Gregory!”

Jones got angry, “You know I don’t like to be called Gregory!”

Cameron yelled, “Monica didn’t seem to mind. Come to think of it neither did you!” He got red but Cameron wasn’t finished, “I don’t get why you made her leave; you wanted her to stay because she is prettier, younger, and better than me in more ways than one!”

Jones violently grabbed Cameron’s waist and brought her close, “Don’t you ever say that! No girl is better than you.” Jones smashed his lips onto hers.

Comments & reviews · 3
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User avatar
Sela Locke
Review

It was okay, if there wasn't supposed to be much action or plot or point. The writing was good, and I'd nitpick on the grammar, but other's'll get to that, and I don't like to anyways. Pretty much the only part I can say I really, really, really, really, really didn't like was:

Jones violently grabbed Cameron’s waist and brought her close, “Don’t you ever say that! No girl is better than you.” Jones smashed his lips onto hers.


Well, at least she got her 'than' right. Maybe describe 'grabbed' her waist better? It makes it sound like he used one hand, and that would be -- awkward. Better make it clearer, or else it just looks like poor word choice. ;)

Er, yeah, this is... not very well done, this part here. For one, it's expected and what Jones says is very flat and cardboard-y, but also, I've seen this problem a lot: He wrapped his lips around hers, -shudder- or he smashed his lips onto hers. Not only do they sound unrealistic and downright disgusting, but the first is impossible and the second doesn't sound very dramatic at all, just kind of repulsive, which is what happened with you. Why not just he kissed her *somethingly*? It just sounds more... literary and less teenage-girlish.

I mean, seriously, people, how can you wrap your lips around someone else's? It not only sounds vulgar, it really isn't possible. Smash, yes, although that's also rather vulgar (as is crush, smoosh, etc. xD). Maybe wrap onto, but even that sounds like a five-year-old who just doesn't know what 'wrap' means. I picture... yeah, you don't wanna know what I picture when I hear the words, he wrapped his lips around hers.

Anyways, good luck writing! I hope you find better adjectives aside from 'smash,' soon. =)))

-SELA

User avatar
shadowed_mist
Review

Yes, you're grammer really is bad. Luckily, my friend's grammer is even worse than yours and I managed to decode the story.

Nice second chapter. A couple things I would like to point out, though:

1, your grammer.
2, Timing. Everything happens so quickly I don't understand it. Such as....

She tossed it onto the bed while she kept throwing her stuff into her backpack. Jones walked right past it and slowly grabbed her arms. He gently pinned them down against her side. “Jack, she means nothing to me right now.”

“But she still meant something to you.” She looked away from his face.

“I’m going down there and telling her that she shouldn’t have come here.”

“Do you know what she called me? She called me, a cute little helper.” Jones
laughed, “Jones I’m two years old than her and she treated me like a child.”

Jones stopped laughing, “Okay I’m sorry Cameron.”

“What does she want anyways? Can you trust her?”

“I don’t know but I’ll tell her to leave.” Jones walked out of the door and twenty minutes later he came right back.

“What happened?”

“She couldn’t believe I would choose a girl like you over her and so she slapped me.”

Cameron covered her laugh with her hands. “Oh I’m sorry. Is there anything I can do to help?”



It all happens so fast. Jones leaves and comes back in one sentece. Try to stretch it out, have Cameron think about her feelings while he's away, or something.

“Well,” they both stepped closer to each other till they were face to face. Jones leaned down toward her. “You could show me the treasure.” He turned toward the table and sat down in a chair.


I laughed at this. It was funny!!!


All in all, it's a good story. PM me if you need any help!!!!

Random avatar
Sparrow
Comment

Well this is the second chapter. Sorry it took me so long to post it but i hope you enjoy. Oh and sorry about the weird way it looks i couldn't get my computer to work right so i just left it. One more thing sorry that my grammar sucks ass.
Thank you and good night



The highlighted children are not mine.
— AresFig