Published November 26, 2007
[pre]Incomplete
A pen runs out of ink.
A ruler falls to the floor.
A fierce shout of:
“No More!”
She is at the very brink.
She pulls at her hair.
She harshly sobs out:
“Not There!”
Her work is not finished.
Not done, incomplete.
She quietly gives in:
“Why Me?”[/pre]
------
If you know what category this is supposed to go into, please tell me. I'm currently brain dead and can't figure out which one it is.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
140,101 Literary Works • 673,000 Reviews
D; You're right! *goes off to rewrite* Thank you!
The rhyming isn't an asset to this poem; I think it should be rewritten without it.
I think that the first two stanzas could set the last one up very nicely; the idea behind them is kinda cool. But the last stanza doesn't really hold up to what it could have been. I think it should have made more connection between the "No More"/ "Not There"/ "Why Me" idea. There's this idea of incompleteness, but she only says "why me?" she "gives in" but what she says following that doesn't seem to be giving in as much as giving up.