Fingers, bloody, in the rain.
The sky is falling - what's to gain?
Beasts in cages, lovers scorned.
Sometime, somewhere, someone yawned.
Writers one and writers all,
We cannot let our artworks fall,
If books are dying, then die we must.
Before our beauties turn to dust.
Dickens. Poe, Austen too.
Which of these compare to you?
It's far too hard to write that well,
In vain our pens, on paper fell.
But, maybe, some hope remains,
The title "Classic" stands to gain.
Perhaps, imbued with our swift passion,
Our works will never die and ashen.
We know there's hope - it isn't found.
When by Writer's Block we're bound.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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125,008 Literary Works • 672,828 Reviews
This made me smile! I loved it
I agree that "somewhen" should be changed, as that is not actually a word, and kinda confused/bothered me. Also, "our works will never die and ashen" could maybe be changed to "our works will never be ashen and die" or something as it makes a bit more sense, but it's cool either way.
I really like this poem because it speaks the truth. Too many kids are reverting to the exact same slang language forbidden on YWS. It pains me to find such a revelation in your works but nonetheless, I loved it.
There's a lot of inspiration in this poem and I liked how you chose your rhyme scheme. If it was any other, the poem wouldn't have flowed so well. Here's a couple errors I found, or things that altered the perfect transitions.
I'm not sure somewhen is actually a word. Perhaps you could use sometime as a substitue?
Another thing I noticed was this:
The "our pens ON PAPER fell," sounds odd to me. Perhaps you could switch it to "In vain, on paper, our pens fell" or "In vain our pens, on paper, fell," It would just look better with a comma in there since I don't think that's grammatical. I give this poem, however, a thumbs up! *clicks like button*
I found this poem particularly amusing. It was well written and had nice structure and speaks a terrifying truth, which is, literature is becoming a dying art. I completely agree with that statement, but there is hope because things like this are written, which have substance. I found the way this was written made think of a funny limerick, but one which actually had a point. Good job with this. Keep writing in this style and you will go further with your writing career.