Heavens vocal cords

by Seven

Published December 27, 2006

She sings harmonious symphonies
that entrap my heart and soothe my soul
I cannot control my passionate feelings
toward her enchanting role
my ears yearn to hear her
rich and radiant tone.

The happiness that i feel is unlike
any other that i have felt before
sheer bliss envelops my body and
i am grateful to be blessed by her
divine vocal superiority.

Comments & reviews · 6
Random avatar
misspriss
Comment
misspriss commented Comment · Dec 30, 2006

This is good, but I think it would be better if you capitilized your i's. :-)

blackwings_angel commented Comment · Dec 30, 2006

I liked it. Who's this amazing singer you wrote about? You should do more poetry it really works for you

Random avatar
misspriss
Comment
misspriss commented Comment · Dec 30, 2006

It's good, but I'm not a poetry person, so I wouldn't know much about poetry, but please, PLEASE, capitalize your I's.

A shrink would say that it shows lack of self-confidence, but I know that is shows a lack of grammar!

User avatar
yoha_ahoy
Review
yoha_ahoy wrote a review Review · Dec 30, 2006

I love your style. This captured me right away. And it's short and simple which makes me like it even more. Great descriptions. I think you've got something good here. Welcome to the YWS! Keep writing! :D

User avatar
smanda4
Review
smanda4 wrote a review Review · Dec 29, 2006

okay i like this and it is oviusly well thouhgt out but the fact that it does not have any commers makes it kinda hard to read. i dont like the last line it just dosent seem to go with the rest of the poem. and you should look at that but other wise the use of words is realy good.



If fortis was here, we could have a teal party
— Pompadour