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Young Writers Society


16+ Violence Mature Content

Ice & Magic - Chapter One

by ScarlettFire


Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for violence and mature content.

For Tenyo's LMS V! Word Count: 1,836.

Chapter One

Sunlight glinted off the highly polished, golden roofs of the temple in the distance, catching Ceri in the eye as she ducked beneath a long-hanging washing line. She cursed under her breath as she dodged the carriage headed east and into the markets. It was far too early to be up, but the Temple of the Mother demanded dedication and she’d already missed the morning worship. Ceri glanced about the square, taking in all the stalls crammed into the modest space before she decided that slipping around the edges of the main market square would probably be easier than trying to head straight through.

Lundr was a pretty little township settled in a valley between the capital of Khasas and the port of Desa--a strategic point near the border Alcoria shared with Eshon to the West. Ceri didn’t bother herself too much with politics; she was a priestess of the Temple and a damned good one. What use did she have for knowledge of the two largest kingdoms on the continent other than to know where the Temple stood with them? She didn't even know who ruled Eshon--it wasn't relevant information in the Temple. And it wasn't like Ushor to south-east showed any interest in them than Eshon did. She'd seen plenty of Eshonni, though; they were pretty and clearly liked to travel, what with their pale skin and pale hair with bright violet or blue eyes. Her hair was a brilliant golden yellow, like spun gold or straw, according to her fellow priestesses, and her eyes were a deep, sea blue. To most, she was pretty but Ceri could care less about beauty.

Besides, she was late. She could worry about beauty later.

Ceri ducked beneath a wooden beam that was propped up against a wall and into an alleyway that would lead her through the backstreets to the temple, frowning. She knew there were tensions with the Yethian pirates and Alcoria, and between Eshon and Ushor, but as far as she was aware, everyone seemed content to ignore the small kingdom of Alcoria stuck between them. It was just their neighbours throwing thousands of men and women their their deaths on the small stretch of land where their borders met at the south-western point on Alcoria. Ceri sighed, rubbing a hand over her veiled face. She was far too tired to be thinking such heavy thoughts for so early in the morning.

The vibrant colours and the bustle of the markets faded behind her as Ceri moved deeper into the backstreets of Lundr. It wasn't a small town, but it wasn't big enough to be a city, either, and Ceri loved it. Well, as much as she was allowed to love anything, that was. She adjusted her headpiece and turned right, took herself past several small streets, barely more than gaps between tall, stone buildings before she turned left onto a slightly wider one. The golden roofs of the temple came into view as she rounded the bend in the street.

She smiled and was just about to step out onto the main thoroughfare to the temple when a hand--holding a foul-smelling cloth--clamped around her mouth and another slithered around her throat, yanking her backwards into the dark alleyway behind her. Her scream was muffled by the hand-and-cloth, and when she inhaled, she gagged on the foul substance that the cloth had been soaked in. Her vision wavered, but she still saw the two men standing nearby. One held a length of rope while a dull trickle of sunlight glinted off something in the other one's hands.

Ceri panicked, fighting against the mans hold on her even as she could feel her strength--and her awareness--fading. Whatever they'd soaked the cloth in was strong, and it ate away at her strength at a terrifying pace, until her vision went black and grey around the edges with lack of air and whatever foul liquid they were using. She watched on dully, hands falling away from the arm around her neck, as the man with the glinting object approached her with a wicked smile, dark eyes narrowed in something like satisfaction. She could do nothing as what he held registered in her sluggish mind. It was a set of anti-mage bracelets, and Ceri's panicked resurfaced, but it was a dull, distant thing.

He slid the bracelets onto her wrists ad she sagged in her third captors hold. Because that's what they were and she was being kidnapped. Ceri glared at the man, even as he activated the anti-mage bracelets and pain stole her breath--and her consciousness--away.

She woke sometime later, gagged and bound, in the back of a wagon. It jolted and she rolled onto her side to take a better look at her surroundings, trying to figure out where she was past the pounding in her head and the sluggish feeling that snaked through her body. The wagon was made of wood and had metal bars encircling it, but was covered in what appeared to be blankets or, perhaps, some sort of canvas. Ceri frowned, jolting as the wagon lurched into motion.

Still weak and dazed from whatever drug they'd used on her, because it had to be some kind of drug, Ceri rolled back over and let the motion and still-sluggish feeling in her veins lull her back to sleep. She drifted between awareness and sleep for some time, unable to tell how long she'd been kept in the wagon for, before they jolted--finally--to a sudden stop. It took her a moment to reorientate herself, and finally recognise the noises outside for voices. Ceri jerked in her bonds weakly, listening as they rounded the wagon to the rear, to the door she'd only just noticed opposite her.

The canvas was flicked up and bright, mid-afternoon sunlight flittered into the dark space, blinding her. Ceri cringed away from it, blinking away the bright, dancing white spots scattered across her vision. When it cleared, there was a heavy hand on her ankle and she was being dragged out into the fading light, hair and ski catching against ragged edges and rogue nails as she was unceremoniously dumped onto the ground beside an already-lit campfire. she could feel long scratches even through her light, summer uniform.

"Ah, there she is," said the man sitting beside the fire with barely glance in her direction. Ceri's head and back throbbed with pain, but she managed to narrow her eyes into a glare and watched the man carefully. He was older than her, with dark brown hair that was turning grey at his temples and dark, cruel eyes an odd shade of amber that she knew meant he was probably a mage. She'd heard of priestesses being kidnapped, but had never thought that she'd be one of them. Despite her calm facade, her heart was pounding and she was starting to panic. She couldn't let them figure out how scared she was. He turned to look at her, a knowing smirk on his face as if he knew how scared she really was. "Finally back with us, hm?"

Ceri snorted and raised her head just a little. Terrified as she was, she wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of behaving like any other woman would. Ceri was proud to be a priestess of the Mother, and she was a powerful healer. She wasn't going to let this man dictate his twisted terms to her, not when he was looking so msug that he'd caught a priestess. Everyone knew the priestesses weren't to be touched, that the Goddess and all those she protected were considered sacred. How dare this man take what the Goddess had claimed! How dare he lay hands on her and take her away from all she knew!

The man snorted and leaned back on the log he'd claimed as if he hadn't a care in the world. "Well," he said, gaze flickering to either side of her. Ceri refused to look because she was sure she'd see more of her captors lingering nearby. "The Goddess taketh..." With that, he stood slowly, stretched and then approached her with a lazy, bored stride. He stood over her for a moment, then crouched down and grabbed her chin before she could jerk away from her. His grip was tight, bruisingly so, and Ceri winced as his fingers dug painfully into her skin. "If I take off the gag, do you promise not to scream?"

She nodded and his other hand went to the back of her head, working the knots behind her head free. She spat the soft cloth out and sucked in a deep breath. The man's gaze narrowed and then Ceri screamed, loud and ear-shattering. He jerked away from her, and the force of the magic she'd put into it. Just because she was a temple healer didn't mean that she didn't know how to use offensive magic. She did, she just chose not to. After a moment, when Ceri's magic-fueled scream faded and she lay panting in the dirt, he sat up and smirked at her.

"Oh, darling," he purred, dark eyes dancing with cruel amusement. "You're going to wish that you hadn't done that."

Suddenly, a blinding, bone-deep pain surged into her and through her veins, burning her from the inside out. This time, when she screamed, it wasn't the offensive, magic-fueled scream of before, but one of pure pain. She screamed until her throat gave out and the pain faded, leaving her laying limp in the dirt and panting harshly,barely able to suck in enough air to keep herself conscious.

"Lesson learned, hm?"

"Screw you," Ceri muttered, staring blankly up at the sky. "I refuse to tell you anything about the Temple--"

"What makes you think that we want to know about the temple, pretty girl?" Ceri lowered her gaze to the man, pinning him in place with a sour, angry glare. He grinned at her, standing up and returning to his seat by the fire. He tossed a log into it, making the flames flare up and spit sparks up into the sky, before glancing back towards her. "It's never about the temple, my dear. It's always about the girls who are in the temple's service. Do you understand what I mean?"

And damn him, but Ceri did. She knew what he was implying. Those who served Lundr's temple were usually untouched--young, pretty girls with little knowledge of the world. Ceri, though... She knew she was different. She'd come to them older, already jaded by life and already damaged. She didn't bother to tell him that, just stared at him in disgust and growing horror. This man and his goons... They weren't just any old kidnappers. They were slavers, and they'd just decided she was worth her weight in gold to some idiot out there who would pay for her.


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174 Reviews


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Sun Dec 29, 2019 12:26 am
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soundofmind wrote a review...



Bro!!! I'm here two months late from when you posted this but I wanna give you a review on your chapter my dude!

The moment I started reading I felt very immersed in your world! You put a lot of thought into your world building and it shows.

It was just their neighbors throwing thousands of men and women their to their deaths on the small stretch of land where their borders met at the south-western point on Alcoria.

Tiny little thing, but I assume you meant to their deaths. But on another note, I like hearing about her world - how she lives in a nation between two warring ones. That creates for some intense tensions in her homeland I'm sure. Even if she says she's not one for politics, I'm sure it affects her.

Ceri panicked, fighting against the mans man's hold on her even as she could feel her strength--and her awareness--fading.

Okay, so I know like, you don't really specifically indicate how long it takes for her to lose consciousness/strength and all that, and I think you actually paced it pretty well, but a part of me is still wondering if this happens too fast? I just have omnom's voice in the back of my head when he told me how chloroform and most irl knockout drugs don't work as fast as they show it in the movies.

It was a set of anti-mage bracelets, and Ceri's panicked resurfaced, but it was a dull, distant thing.

OOOOH!!! There's magic? Is Ceri a mage? Ohh this just got more interesting. I figured this was all a fictional world but it'll be interesting to see how the magic fits in with the temples and the religion and stuff. Now I'm wondering how magic plays into it all - who has it, is it something people are born with or learn, is it exclusive to the temples, etc, etc.

He slid the bracelets onto her wrists ad she sagged in her third captors hold. Because that's what they were and she was being kidnapped.

Okay so for some reason, this reads really funny to me. Just because the "because that's what they were" explanation seems a bit unnecessary (it's fairly obvious what's going on lol) but if that's legitimately Ceri's inner thoughts that's just... really funny to me.

...hair and skin catching against ragged edges and rogue nails as she was unceremoniously dumped onto the ground beside an already-lit campfire.

I assume you mean skin here lol, but OUCH!!!!! That sounds really painful!! Idk about you but when I get scratched by a bunch of sharp things ?? Um?? Owie.

Also practical question - why is the fire lit if it's afternoon... unless I guess, they're cooking something. *sweats nervously*

She couldn't let them figure out how scared she was. He turned to look at her, a knowing smirk on his face as if he knew how scared she really was. "Finally back with us, hm?"

The repetition of this similar wording took me out for a second - and I know it's LMS so like! It's chill! Just thought I'd point it out.

But also, this guy seems to know her, but she doesn't appear to know him. And the implication that she's left or escaped because he says she's back with them??? VERY INTERESTING. I wonder what kind of trouble she's left behind in her past... she doesn't seem to indicate that she knows him, but maybe I should keep reading.

Ceri was proud to be a priestess of the Mother, and she was a powerful healer.

OHHH??? So she's a HEALER!!!

And yeah, uh, YOU BET SHE WAS GONNA SCREAM, but it sucks that the guy did icky pain magic because he's a meanie. :(

But oh man... poor Ceri. This does not sound like good news for her at all, but I like that you took us right into the action in the first chapter. I definitely look forward to seeing where this will go but I also dread how dark it might get. It sounds like Ceri has a lot of trouble ahead of her, and with it happening so early in the story, I wonder what more there is to come.

Also interested to see if the claims that those who touch the girls of the temple will regret it b/c of the goddess deal, or if that's just superstition and traditional belief.

I'm gonna go read more!!!! You did great on this! :)
-sound




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Thu Oct 10, 2019 12:41 pm
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JabberHut wrote a review...



Hi, Scar!!

This is SO intriguing. I can tell you have such a detailed world already for your story. There's so much geography, politics, even culture! I'm really just excited to learn more about how the world operates. I have so many questions!!

I really like Ceri and the setup you have here. She clearly has a history and is unique to other priestesses. While I AM interested in the Temple and why they function the way they do, Ceri is an even more curious case because clearly the Temple made an exception for her! Perhaps the goddess knew Ceri and knew how valuable of an ally she would be?! And it sounds like Ceri accepted whatever calling she had from the Temple because it at least got her off the streets.

Speaking of which, it was very interesting that she lived outside the Temple! Considering the priestesses require a high amount of security, and they aren't even supposed to be touched, I'd figure they'd all just live in the Temple. Granted, she was leaving super early, so perhaps the town was quiet -- but that could still be a security risk for kidnappers AS WE CLEARLY FOUND OUT!

I love this idea of innocent priestesses being preyed upon by a sort of black market. This just sounds like a HUGE crime, and the fact that you put us in the thick of the action so quick is really exciting to me. I already have a good idea of what's happening and the possibilities it could get into. I don't really have much allegiance with Ceri yet, simply an understanding of her background and nature at the Temple, but I am intrigued and hope to grow emotionally attached to her over time.

Also, how fortunate for her that her capture is kind of a dunce! OF COURSE CERI WAS GOING TO SCREAM. Even if he was looking for a chance to hurt her, she still... screamed. XD Though, I guess she's also still shackled! SO. I FEAR FOR THE UGLY DIRECTION THIS IS GOING TO GO.

I'm super interested in reading more of this! I can't wait to read your next chunk. I wish you luck on your LMS endeavors!! :D

Keep writing!

Jabber, the One and Only!




ScarlettFire says...


Thank yoooooou, Jabs <3




I *do* like flipping tables.
— Faye Whitaker, Questionable Content